Full Moon
by up2nogoodj5
Summary: Its beena long year since he left, no note, call, nothin. Wat happens if the cullens return. Will Edward return to Bella? Will/would sheforgive him Or will she cont. to fall for Jacob. and then what happens when Vicoria returns with some surprising allias
1. Chapter 1

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Chapter 1: Lost for forever

Time passes even when it seems impossible. Even when each tick of the second hand aches like the pulse of blood behind a bruise. It passes unevenly, in strange lurches and ragging lulls, but pass it does. Even for me.

A Year. It's been almost a whole year since he left me sit here in forks, the rainiest place I've ever known! Its hell, with out Edward my angel, its pure torturing hell. To me time seemed to stand still, the year, it felt like much more than just one year, few years, decades maybe. I looked out to the crashing waves of the beach, the sun glistening, sparkling off the water, wishing I would see the real sparkle I wanted to see in the sun, and it wasn't the water. I sat there remembering the day he told me he didn't want me anymore. _'The day he realized that I was no good for him, I was a mere human, I wasn't anything special he could have someone much better than me. Less breakable, less fragile, something more. Someone special.'_ I thought to myself bitterly, wishing I could just shut my mind off completely, away from all the thoughts and the memories.

The first few days my mind my body my entire being, didn't believe it, I was in denial. I wouldn't except it. I couldn't. I woke up every morning after he left to nightmares, screams, torture. Thinking it was juts ALL one big bad dream. That it didn't happen, id open my eyes and he would be there sitting in the coner of my room on the chair. I imagined it all. But I knew my imagination wasn't that good. My room was empty, silent, no one was there, no one was there to greet me. To hold me and shake away the bad dream, because it wasn't a dream, it was a nightmare, come true.

I went to school, still with the hope that I would see that stupid shiny Volvo in the parking lot, I'd see Edward smiling waiting to greet me as I got out of my truck. Alice hopping up and down, in anticipation for our next shopping spree. I knew I was only fooling myself, no one was there, no Volvo, no Alice and defiantly no Edward when I got home no one was there to open the door for me. Or greet me by my window. My mind had acknowledged the fact he wasn't coming back. But my heart, now that was a different story. It only just now started to except the truth. The Cullen's were gone. Emmet, Jasper, Rosalie, Esme, Carlisle, Alice, and I couldn't even think the name. but I had to, he was gone, Edward was gone. He left me, and took a huge part of me with him. Maybe he it all. I knew I would never be whole again. I would never get that missing piece back. It was like an unfinished puzzle because one single piece was missing the whole puzzle, ruined.

I knew it would never be the same. I would never find anyone like Edward. He left me bitter, a part of me hated him for leaving me. But that was a small part. The rest of me just wished he would come back to me, wrap me in his cool embrace, and just hold me. But I was only fooling myself. When he left, he took me with him, and left behind a cold hard shell of my former self.

Tomorrow it will be a whole year since he left me broken. 'You… don't… want me?' 'No.' The words still echoed in my mind. Now worse than ever, it faded and slowly it didn't hurt so bad, but now its all coming back, the feelings, the memories we shared. The pain of loosing him, it was almost unbearable, it was almost like him leaving me all over again. I dreaded twilight. Another end to another day, and that next day would bring the pain I so deeply wanted to avoid.

I didn't know that all that work I did trying to ignore and push the deep void I felt deep down, so no one would see how I really felt would miraculously just be ripped open again by the shear memory of what he did to me, just because the day came slowly creeping up on me. Slowly that shell seemed to be filling up. I was beginning to actually smile and laugh and be kind of normal. I owed that mostly to Jacob. At first I thought he was fixing the whole Edward left, fixing me filling that whole that was there. And the closer it got to the day he left, the faster it all got ripped open again. And I soon realized no one and nothing could fill that void I felt. Not even Jake. There was only one person one thing that could fill that gaping deep whole.

And they were never coming back, he was never coming back to me.

Time passes, but time doesn't heal all wounds.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Jump**

I sat there on the beach thinking over every word, every memory. Trying to suppress the demons that haunted me, and wished for my end. Wished for my demise I tried to find out what I was going to do when tomorrow finally came. I didn't want to think about it anymore. But I had no choice. I had to find away to keep the monsters at bay. Keep myself from returning to that shell, that scared everyone I loved so much, that scared Charlie, and Renee, and even myself. Apparently I didn't do a good job of hiding the fact that I was empty, a hallow shell.

"Bella, Bells" I heard shouting, as my thoughts were interrupted. I didn't mind. Anything to forget. I saw Jacob come running toward me. I smiled. "What's wrong?"

"What are you talking about Jake?"

"You, It took you like forever to realize I was calling you, I said your name like 6 times"

"Oh." What could I say to that? 'Oh sorry Jake I was to busy trying not to sulk and turn into the shell again'? Mope. that's better, I remember Charlie using that, 'Moping would be better-that would be doing _something. you're_ just … lifeless, Bella I think that's the word I want.' Lifeless I was, and I'm not even sure that holds any light to what I really was.

"Bella? Bella, are you listening to me?"

"What? Sorry Jake I'm just not, in a good mood right now. I'm sorry if you want I can go home and you can call Quil and Embry." I smiled faintly.

"Not a chance, I told you today was your day, no pack, no patrolling, they can handle patrol for one day with out me. I haven't been much fun lately, I know, I'm sorry, but we still have to find that bloodsucker Victoria."

"Oh I know."

"Is that what has you all worked up? Victoria? Don't worry about her Bells, we'll get her."

"Have you found something new?"

"No she's still no where to be found, she disappeared again, hopefully for good." I knew it wasn't for good, and I could tell Jake new that too. His eyes lowered when he said it. This past year, She's been back, trying to get me, because of James. She would try to get through to forks, to me. But the pack would hold her at bay, she would weave in and out of the boundary lines. Although they didn't matter anymore, the Cullen's weren't in forks anymore. And when they'd get close to getting her, she would disappear, sometimes for weeks on end. But she always returned.

"Yeah, Wishful thinking, she'll be back though." I frowned.

"And we'll be waiting." Jake smiled at the thought. "As for today, we have better things to worry about. I have a plan for today that your going to love!" he was just twitching with excitement, and it got me wondering, a little excited. I shouldn't be excited. I shook the thought away.

"Bella." he said softly. Here it comes. "What's wrong, and don't lie to me and tell me its nothing I can tell, Bella I know you. Something's not right. You haven't looked like this since…" There it goes, it clicked in his head. Like the switch of a light bulb. "It's 'him' isn't it?" he knew I didn't like the name said, I don't know how he knew but he knew a lot about me, and what I needed. "Tomorrow, it'll be.." He stopped when he looked at my face. And he put an arm around my shoulder and pulled me to him. I smiled up at him.

"So what are we doing today." I asked him as I pushed him away gently and smiled again.

"Well… what did I promise you I would take you do, but I didn't ever get the chance, and you almost killed yourself trying?" My smile vanished. He was talking about when I almost jumped off the cliff. Into a hurricane. Of course the entire pack new, they saw it through Jack. And they all had the same conclusion, I wanted to jump into the hurricane, I wanted to drown. I wanted my life to end. Even though that's not was I was thinking. I wasn't really thinking at all. I was just doing. Looking for the voice. But sometimes I wondered if my subconscious wanted it. Wanted to drown. I told them over and over again that I didn't know, and that was so far from the truth, but sometimes I wondered if I was just ignoring the truth. Thank god they didn't tell Charlie. He would have been furious!. And I would never of heard the end of it.

"Bella, did you hear me? I'm not going to keep talking to you if your not going to listen, or answer or even show that I'm talking to you. I bet I could call you a retard right now or say your in love with Quil and you wouldn't even hear me." he smirked, and I hit him, hard.

"Ow, I heard that!" I said as I glowered at him.

"Well, what do ya think?"

"I think it's a great idea! Can we do it from the top?" I asked, I was actually excited.

"Uh no." He saw my face drop to a pout. "At least not the first time. Show you the ropes, and how to do it first. That sound fair?"

"As fair as I'm going to get I suppose." I grinned.

We finally got to the lower outcropping part of the cliff, I already had some cuts and scrapes on my hands and knees. Jacob just laughed at my clumsiness. And helped me as much as he could.

I didn't realize how high it was. I could hear the ocean beneath us, the calm wind blew my hair all around my face. I sighed.

"Scared? Jacob grinned.

"No, I.. just nervous."

"Least your not jumping into a hurricane this time."

"Ugh will everyone please just forget that? Will I ever be able make people realize I wasn't trying to kill myself!" I shouted.

"Bella I was joking, I know you weren't trying to, you know."

"I'm sorry its just, lets get this over with so we can go to the top."

"You just said you were nervous about jumping from here and you want to go to the top?" he looked puzzled. I just laughed. I was laughing, I smiled, no matter what the situation I could always be myself with Jake, I couldn't not be happy. He grabbed my hand and squeezed. "Ready?"

"As I'll ever be." he backed me up, and laughed, I guess I had a smirk on my face. I could feel it.

We started running, and we took a leap. I heard Jake laugh. We were falling, plunging, and I was screaming. The water was icy as we sliced through. I was breathing deep. And trying to resurface. And Jacob pulled my arm up and we were out. I took in a deep breath of fresh air. As he pulled me toward the shore. We both plopped down in the sand. He was still laughing. "So how was it? As good as you thought it was going to be?"

"Yea, it was great." I lied, I didn't hear what I thought I would, what I needed to hear. I needed that voice. I needed that soft velvet musical voice. "Lets go to the top." I exclaimed as I stood up and started walking

"Are you sure, you don't want to try the outcropping one once more?" he said as he caught up to me.

"Nope, top, now."

"Uhm if your sure."

We got to the top faster, less climbing over or in my case stumbling over rocks. Just a small trail. The ocean sounded further away. The wind wasn't as bad as it was up here. I smiled into the sun and took in a deep breath.

"You ok?" Jacob asked me as he grabbed my hand.

"Yes, are we going to run?"

"Uh we can, I usually just jump, but we can get a running start if.."

"Yea lets run" I said cutting him off as I led him back away from the cliffs edge.

"Bella?" He looked nervous, serious, what should he be nervous about? He's done this before.

"What is it Jake." Now I was nervous.

"I, I just wanted to do something before we, you know in case we don't make it." He grinned. I wanted to hit him for scaring me like that but I held it in. and just glared at him. He laughed, and then we were both laughing.

"No I'm serious though."

"Ok, what is it Jake?" I asked, and then realization hit me as he wrapped his arm

Around my waist. And leaned forward, closer, to close "Ja.." I tried to protest, but I was to late. His lips met mine, his warm lips, were on mine in seconds. They weren't the cold hard lips I grew to love, they were soft, and warm, to warm. I was to shocked to move, I didn't know what to do, I tried to think of what I should do, pull away, smack him, shove him away. And before I could do anything he let me go. He saw surprise, shock on my face, and took it the wrong way. I tried to shake my head but before he could even see he was dragging me toward the cliff, we were running we were close to the edge when it hit me.

"Bella, what are you doing?" The soft velvet voice hit me with so much force it knocked the wind out of me. After that, after Jake kissed me, it was still there, it came out of the silence. I fell backward, and landed on my butt. I caught myself with my elbows. As I saw Jake leap off the edge. And I realized my feet were hanging over the edge. I scooted myself back. I sat there memorizing the voice I so lounged for, the voice I hadn't heard in over a month. Memorizing the music, memorizing it all taking it in.

Bella, BELLA??" I heard Jake below yelling. "Are you ok?"

I pulled myself to the edge and stood. "Jake?"

"What happen are you ok?"

"Yea, I, uh, I tripped." we were both yelling over the noise of the crashing waves.

"You want me to come back up and get you?"

"NO! I'm coming." I needed to hear that voice again, I needed to her him.

I stepped out further to the edge, keeping my eyes focused. My toes were over the edge. I waited, I held my breath. Waiting for it, it wouldn't catch me off guard again.

"Bella" I smiled. There it was, the voice I needed. My smile grew as I lifted my arms up in the air, about to dive.

"Bella don't be stupid what the hell are you thinking?" I heard the voice, he was angry. I flung myself off the cliff. A scream escaped me again. I hit the water, to hard, it felt cooler than the last time. It knocked the wind out of me, and I took in gasp of air, only It wasn't air. The salt water pierced my throat, it felt like knives in my lungs. Oh no I was really going to drown. I couldn't breath, it was happening I was really drowning. I just let it come. At least they couldn't all say I did it to kill myself. This wanst suicide this was just a happy coincidence.

**A/N Please review, tell me how im doing, what you like, what you dont like. tell me if you would like some one elses point of veiw, like edwards also. im thinking of added his point of veiw on things to, but im not sure. so let me know!:)**

**this is my first fanfic so please be gentle. **


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I would like to thank jls4438 for giving me my very first review! Thanks so much for reading! Uhm I had asked if people would like Edwards point of view also. Instead of just bella. So I decided to give it a try. Let me know what you think. And if you don't like it I have another chapter 3 in my head that I can write a different way. I know its kind of twilighty. But just read, you'll be surprised. lol**

**Chapter 3: Lifeless**

EDWARDS POV

UGH I signed this is as hopeless as the last time. Why am I hear? I had left for a reason, I was no good for them, I was no good to anyone. Not even myself. I couldn't even track Victoria. I growled at the thought of her. I started shaking my head, this is insane I cant stay here this isn't my home. Not anymore, I don't have a home. But Alice, Alice made me promise to come visit, and I did, I didn't stay long. Enough time for them to see that I was, o… well, to see that I was still here, and alive, or as alive as a vampire can be. But never more than that.

I didn't want them to feel pity, or feel sorry for me, and they always did. I can hear it, even if they tried to hide there thoughts it always played in the background, and I could hear what they thought of me, what they thought I looked like. Hell that's what it was I looked like hell. I felt like hell, and they knew it. But there was nothing they could do. Nothing anyone could do. I did this to myself. I left for a reason, and I wasn't going back. I made a promise. '_It will be as if I'd never existed._' I shouldn't exist, I want to die, but I knew the minute I thought about it, or planned to do it, Alice would see, and she'd stop me. It was stupid to even think about, I could go to Italy, and beg. I pushed the thought away. I can do this, I thought, I can go in, say hello to my family. Stay the night, and leave. Go back to my life. Or well you couldn't even call it a life. I had no life anymore, I left my life back in forks, with, I shuttered to even think the name. Bella. My Sweet clumsy Bella.

If there was even a chance I thought just one chance, she would take me back any at all that Bella would take me back, that I could make her happy, I would have taken it. But I couldn't, all I ever enforced on her was pain, day after day minute after minute, I risked her life. First James, and then from my own family. I knew Jasper felt guilty, when I would visit he would try his best to avoid me, so I wouldn't be able to read his mind I wouldn't be able to see how bad and hurt he was that. He blamed himself for me leaving Bella, he blamed himself for me being so unhappy, so not me. I was lifeless. And he felt my emotions, and told himself it was his fault. But it wasn't his fault. If it wasn't him, it would have been someone else. I mean everyone is curious about all of us, 'vegetarians' and they'd be double curious that we had a human around with us. What did James' coven call her, a pet. that's it we had a pet. I mused at the thought, if only that were true, this wouldn't be so hard.

Bella was so much more than a pet, she was so much more than just a regular human. She was my Bella, my love. My soul mate, as Alice told me the day I told her we had to leave. I was never scared of Alice in my life. But the day I told her we were leaving forks leaving Bella, she was scary. I had never seen rage in her eyes before. _'She is your soul mate Edward, you cant leave her!_' Soul mate, ha I laughed at the thought as if I had a soul. _'Edward don't be selfish, she knows what shes getting herself into, she chose this, she wants this! She loves you, don't do this to her, don't do this to yourself' _I hated her for trying to make me change my mind, cause she knew exactly what to say to make me do it. I didn't listen to her after that I just ran, and knew she couldn't keep up. If only I would have listened to her. She was right, it was true. I did this to myself, I had no one to blame but me.

I was lying listlessly on my couch staring at the ceiling. Like I had for the last 3 days, I hadn't moved once. I didn't feel like moving, I had no need. I could hear them outside my door, but they never dared come in. Sometimes I could hear one of them sit outside in the hall by my door. Someone was there right now. Probably Alice. Not wanting me to be alone. But I was alone. I had my family yes, so technically I wasn't alone, but I felt alone, without Bella there was no need for anything else. Life for me was over. Alice had convinced me to come back to live with the family 3 days ago. No, convince wasn't the right word. She had conscripted Emmett and Jasper to forcibly remove me from my rat infested attic. I had been wallowing in my own misery for so long I didn't have the strength to fight back. I hadn't visited in to long. According to her it had been over 3 months since I last visited them. It couldn't have been, had I really stayed away for 3 months. I must have, or she wouldn't have freaked out so much. I usually had to visit at least once a month, she wanted more. But that's all I would allow myself to do is stay for a day or two a month and then leave. I couldn't put them through the pain I was in.

But really I had just put them through more. Alice got mad when I said I wasn't staying she forced me to see the things she thought about, she thought about everyone. So I agreed to stay, only because I saw what I had done to my family. They never smiled, joked, or even laughed. Emmett didn't do much except watch TV anymore. And he didn't even really watch, it just stared at it blankly. Carlisle worked obsessively, he wasn't home much, Esme never stopped cleaning and she looked horrible she looked like someone had died.. Jasper spent as much time away from the family as possible hiding from their emotions. It was to much for him to bare. And even Rosalie threw constant tantrums, and Alice rarely shopped. My idiocy had sucked the life from not only myself but my family, who had loved and cared for me for eighty years. Ironic. In my self imposed exile I had managed to become the thing I feared the most, a monster.

I heard a bang and it shocked me out of my self loathing. I heard someone running, and then I heard yelling. I sat up.

"Alice, Alice?" Jasper was yelling, they were in front of my door for yelling. Why were they yelling. I ran to my door and wrenched it open annoyed. And then it hit me. The end of Alice's vision swirled in my head. Bella falling into the water and not coming up.

She gasped the same moment I collapsed to the floor with a thud.

"Alice please tell me that's not real. Tell me that's not happening!" I pleaded with her. I looked into her eyes and I knew the truth.

"I, I, Oh no, I don't know when but we have to do something Edward, we have to go back!" she shouted at me I was shaking my head. We couldn't go back, what if she changes her mind what if I see her and I cant leave again. What If I couldn't, I already knew the answer, I wouldn't. I wouldn't leave again.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: ****I would like to thank Ava-Night for giving me some feed back and that will help me write some future chapters! **

**Thanks again for those of you who are reading, and leaving reviews, I hope you enjoy! And if not then tell me what I can do! : ) **

**Chapter 4: **

Before I could even think strong arms grabbed my waist pulling me, pulling me to the surface. And we were free. I choked and spit the water out of my mouth.

"Bella, are you ok? Bella?" this wasn't my velvet soft voice. It was Jake. I tried to talk but my throat killed, it felt like I had just drank acid. So I just nodded my head. The next thing I knew we were on the beach and he was laying me in the sand. And then he was gone, I tilted my head all around looking, but I couldn't find him, he left me. Why does everyone leave. I thought to myself, before I could do anything else I was being hoisted into a sitting position, and a bottle being shoved in my face. What was I two years old?

"Drink Bella, Please, it will help your throat." he insisted, Jake was back with a water bottle. I gulped the water graciously like It was the last drink I would ever have. It was gone. I sighed, and looked up at Jake he still looked worried.

"I'm, fine." my voice cracked, apparently he found it funny, he was laughing. I rolled my eyes. "I'm glad me drowning gives you a laugh." I said bitterly. I wasn't amused.

"Oh come on Bells, I wouldn't let anything happen to you, ever." I smiled up at him and rolled my eyes again. "What?" I didn't answer, I wasn't going to answer. And then it hit me. He, Jacob. Kissed. Me. I said the words over and over and the flash of if happening overwhelmed me and gasped.

"What? Bella, Whats wrong are you ok?" Jacob said startled.

"I, You, me ugh!" I groaned as I stood up and walked away. Jacob came after me looking more confused than ever. I wanted to scream to yell to hit him in the head with a big rock. But I think I was more confused than he was. Jacob had kissed me. I knew how he had felt but I never thought he would do anything about it. He knew I loved Edward, he knew! But I love Jacob to. Don't I? Yes, I do, I really do, but.. Oh my god I was actually answering myself. I'm going nuts, I'm crazy. No I'm not, I love Jacob but its not enough, he will never be what Edward was. But could he be enough..

"Bella, where are you going? Did you hit your head? Your not making any sense." my thoughts were interrupted which just fueled my anger and annoyance.

"Jacob Black how dare you!" I scowled

"What are you talking about Bella?"

"You! You kissed me! How dare you!"

"Bella your just now realizing I kissed you? And your freaking out about it?"

"I am not freaking out Jacob. I am mad I'm upset!" I could feel the tears ready to brim over. "I cant believe you! Why would you do that, knowing full well! Knowing FULL well how I felt about Edw.."

"Don't you even bring up that bloodsucker, Bella, Don't you dare!" He was yelling, he was angry, he was also shaking.

"Don't upset up him, Bella, calm him down. Don't do anything rash." The velvet voice warned me, but I didn't care.

"Shut up!" both of you I thought. "I can't believe you Jacob I can bring up the 'bloodsucker' all I want!" the tears were falling now, and I was screaming.

"Bella he has been gone for a year! Tomorrow it will be one year since same found you laying on the ground in the woods, near death! Only you weren't dead, not really, just on the inside! Because of HIM! So don't you dare bring him up! This has nothing to do with him dammit!" I was crying hysterically and he was still yelling at me. And all I could do was shake my head. "I've seen you Bella, you were better, your were beginning to be normal again, you were happy, you were happy with me. don't do this." he was pleading now.

"I'm, I, I'm sorry Jake." and I turned to walk away. He grabbed my arm and turned me around to face him.

"Bella, please. I love you! More than anything else I love you, this can work if you just give it a chance. I am what you need, you need someone warm, who can be there for you! Edward." I flinched in pain at his name I haven't heard that name out loud in a long while, he saw me flinch and started shaking his head. He grabbed me in a warm embrace and hugged me trying to will me to listen I suppose. "Bella, I'm sorry, but he left you, I know you don't want to hear it but I also know you know I'm right. He's not coming back Bella he's just not. Why cant you see that? Why cant you just except that, and move on. Move on with me." I've never seen Jake that sad before, never seen him in that much pain. And he was in pain, and I was the cause of it.

How do I make him see without hurting him more. Or could I, now I shook the thought away. I couldn't do that to him, knowing full well he would only ever be second place. But I wanted to, I wanted to feel I don't know, I knew what I wanted to feel, I wanted to feel Edwards cool embrace around me, but could that be pushed deep down could that want be subdued by the warm arms around me now? No I wouldn't do that to Jake I wouldn't let him be second place to someone. He deserved to find someone who truly loved him, like he loved them.

"Because I love him Jake. It's not going to change, the heart wants what the heart wants. and mine wants Edward. I'm never going to forget or move on. I don't know how to. Part of me wants to, but part of me wants to believe he'll come back." tears still streaming down my face. I close my eyes trying to suppress them. He pushed me away and I thought I was going to loose someone else. I opened my eyes to look for him, for his face. And the anguish I saw looking back at me, was unbearable. I broke down. I couldn't take it "I'm so sorry Jake. I never…"

"Stop Bella, never be sorry, its my own fault. One day you'll wake up, you'll realize I'm right, that you love me, and that I can make you happy, I already do. And when that day comes, I'll be here waiting." He grinned as he wiped the tears from my face. How can he say that, did he not just hear me? Maybe he couldn't believe it. I didn't really want to believe it, to believe that I was broken forever, never to be fixed again.

"Jacob, I'm serious, its never going to change, I love you, but its not enough."

"It will be, eventually. Think about it Bells." I shook my head and he brought his lips down to mine, his warm soft lips. For a split second I didn't mind, it made him happy.

"Jake." I said softly. "Please, not now. I don't need more to think about, not today."

"Eventually. Because I'm sorry Bells, but he's gone there hasn't been a whiff of him in a year. I would know." I knew he would, but would he tell me if he had smelled Edward, or any of the Cullen's for that matter? I didn't know.

"We should go, I'm sure your getting hungry." He suddenly said as he led me away from the beach.

"MMM, more like the wolf is hungry, your always hungry!"

"Maybe that's true, but I'm sure your getting hungry too."

"I don't know if I can eat right now. But I'll make you something. I should probably get back and start it so its ready for Charlie when he gets home."

The ride was silent, not a single word was uttered the entire way to my house. When I got inside I went upstairs to change, and came down to start dinner.

"What are you doing?" I asked as I walked into a smoke filled kitchen. And found Jake trying to make, god knows what. He was almost as bad as Charlie at cooking. "Jake go open the window and door hurry! Before I die from the smoke." I laughed

After the smoke was cleared. I went to the kitchen and cleaned up Jakes mess, but he didn't let me, so I just went to work on cooking an edible meal while he cleaned. I ended up making meatloaf and mashed potatoes with corn. I forgot that I was dealing with a werewolf and should have made twice as much. After Jake finished his serving he went up for seconds, and thirds. Leaving just enough for Charlie not to starve. After we ate we sat in the living room and watched some TV.

"Not that I know of, Quil or Embry would have come found us, but don't worry when she comes back we'll get her. I promise." I knew the pack was looking out for me and Charlie but that still didn't ease the feeling I had, I felt like something was wrong, something was coming for me. I just didn't know what. I heard Jake let out a moan.

"Jake, are you going to be ok? You've been holding your stomach for the last since you finished eating."

"I'm fine, that was just really good, you can cook for me any day!" He grinned as he grabbed the remote from me, and laughed.

"Hey!" I grabbed for it but ended up falling of the couch onto the floor, it just fueled his laughter. I kicked his legs out from under him and he fell on top of me. We were laughing so hard I couldn't breath.

"Jake, JAKE GET OFF ME!" I yelled through the laughs. Trying to catch my breath.

All of a sudden there was a loud bang and a crash as the front to burst open.

**A/N: oooooooohhh what do you think it is? or who?**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5: Unforgiving **

All of a sudden I see Jake fly through the air and hit the wall on the opposite side of the room. I gasped. To shocked, to terrified to move. I saw Jacob jump up from the corner of my eye. I still couldn't release my self to look away Jake came running snarling teeth bared, he was shaking, it looked like he was having a hard time keeping his form. NO was all I could think, NO, NO. but nothing was coming out. I jumped to my feet, and ran in front of Jacob, he stopped dead in his tracks still snarling and convulsing.

"Bella? Bella are you ok." No not now not here not that velvet voice. "Please. Bella, please look at me." I shut my eyes tight as I was turned around, I heard another snarl come from behind me, from Jacob. "Bella open your eyes." It wasn't going away. Please go away. I can do this not again. I shook my head, that's all I could do.

"Don't touch her you sniveling bloodsucking parasite!" Jacob growled. and then I heard it a snarl come from far behind me, it wasn't Jake. Who ever it was let out a gasp.

"Ooo, what the…?" I knew that voice, I never imagined that voice. It was like soft music, it was, Alice

"No, No, No not again please not again i cant do it again. I cant go through that again." I continued to shake my head.

"No what Bella please? Bella are you ok. Please speak to me. I cant believe your alive, I mean I, Bella oh god Bella." I felt cold hands on my arms pulling me closer, I felt the coldness through the tight, shirt. UGH I side, why did he have to be so god like. "Bella please say something."

I was still shaking my head, eyes still closed. I willed myself to wake up, this had to be a nightmare it had to be. I wrenched my eyes open. Staring back at me weren't the same topaz eyes I was so fond and familiar with, these were dark, unlike the first day I ever met Edward, these eyes looked hallow, empty. Lifeless. I gasped again, and did the only thing I could think of to escape this nightmare. I screamed.

"NO." I shouted and began to shake my head again I tried to back away but he had my arms, I finally pulled one arm free and slapped him across the face as hard as I could. It hurt. But he let go. I backed up and tripped, I fell onto the floor, he tried to help me up, but I screamed and pulled away, I scrambled up the stairs into my room slammed the door and locked it. Tears started to fall, as I slid down the back of my door, into a pile, a blubbering, hysterical pile.

I heard yelling and sounds of feet running up the stairs, more like an elephant. It must have been Jacob, now way were Edward and Alice that noisy. I pulled my knees up to my chin. I felt someone try to open the door, no doubt they could hear me crying.

"Bella. Bells." Jacob bellowed. "Don't make me call Charlie! Bella, open the door. Hunny, please!"

"Stop leave me alone, just go away!" I Screamed, I pleaded through the sobs. I heard him plop himself down on the other side of my door in the hall. It annoyed me, why couldn't he just listen.

"GO AWAY JAKE!" I screamed.

"Bella I'm not leaving you like this, I wont leave you like he did!"

"Dammit Jake just stop please." the last part came as a whisper. I didn't know what else to say, what else to do, I couldn't go back out there. I couldn't face those demons again. I couldn't, I wouldn't do it. I wondered what happen to Alice and.. I sighed I still couldn't think it. No, I imagined it, both of them it was just a nightmare, to force me back into this shell of a life. Life I scoffed it was no life. I had no life. I lost my life a year ago. When Edward left he took my life with him. I felt cold hands on rub my back. No I shook my head, not here to, please. I opened my eyes. To see Alice sad sullen face looking down at me. If she could cry, I'm pretty she would be.

"Are you ok Bella?" she said in a low voice. I heard shuffling from the other side of the door. And a loud growl.

"Bloodsucker, how did you…"

"Don't you growl at me mongrel."

"STOP please. Both of you."

"Open the door Bella, Please." Jake pleaded with me.

"She will when she's ready, I have her right now, why don't you go home and take a flea bath!." Alice hissed. I had never really seen Alice angry, but she sure did look angry. Why was she mad at Jacob he didn't do anything.

"I am not going anywhere you leech."

"STOP I MEAN IT BOTH OF YOU!" I shouted over the snarls and growls.

"Humph." Alice sighed and returned to rubbing my back to console me. I was still crying. "Bella, are you ok? Please say something, anything." she said softly.

"Why?"

"Why, because your scaring me that's why."

"No, No why, are you here, why are you back. Do you guys want to torture me some more, like some anniversary from hell?"

"What?" she asked amazed, she looked horrified.

"Your back, which means Edward wasn't my imagination playing tricks on me again, he was really down there, and oh." Realization hit me, I slapped him, I just now noticed how much my hand hurt. It was red. And was starting to swell. "I hit him." I said holding up my hand.

"It'll be ok, he wasn't hurt, hard as rock. Remember?" she smiled slightly. "And as for your hand, it doesn't look broken, but I could have Carlisle look at it to make sure."

"Carlisle?" he was back, Alice was back, Edward was back. "Were all the Cullen's back?" I asked myself, realizing afterward I had said it aloud

"Yes, there back at the house, I, he, you jumped, I saw you jump and you fell into the water and you never came up. I saw , I saw you drown. You never came up, I waited I watched, nothing. You should be dead!." she was ranting "Dead, why are you here, how are you here?"

"I, what?" I asked confused. How did she see me drown? "I was cliff diving. The kids down at La Push do it. And It looked fun, I didn't drown."

"Oh well I mean, I saw you run and then you fell, and then you looked really sad, and then you just jumped. And you never came back up. I got worried, Edward saw, and everyone got worried, I was worried, oh Bella I'm sorry, I should have never came, we should have stayed away, like he promised. He made us promise to stay away, ugh why didn't I listen to him. Why didn't I stop prying. I wasn't even looking for you at the time it just came to me, I saw, I didn't think…"

"Alice, slow down, calm down. I did fall, and I was sad, I am sad, but I didn't do it to kill myself I didn't drown. I fell to hard and knocked my breath out, but Jacob, he pulled me back up, he jumped first before I fell we were going to jump together but I fell and he went first." I was trying to understand. Why did Edward care. Why did any of them care. They left, they left me here! "Why does it matter, what if I DID jump off intending to drown, what would it matter?" I was mad now tears still spilling over. "You left, you left me! You don't care! Why would you? I'm just some mere human after all!" I got up and walked over and collapsed onto my bed. I was angry, I was furious. How dare she, how dare him!

"Bella! Don't you dare think for one minute that I don't care, that I don't care about you. Or that I would throw a party at your death! I was scared, I thought I had lost you when I didn't see you come up for air. So don't you sit there and tell me I don't care! I love you Bella, you're my sister and I love you!"

"HA you love me, but you leave me!"

"I left, because I thought it was what was best for you! We all did, I tried to make him change his mind, we did. But he was set in is ways, he's stubborn you of all people should know that! I tried to tell him it was wrong that you loved him that you were soul mates but he said that it didtn matter, he said we had to do what was best for you, we couldn't keep putting you in harms way."

"Harms way? I was safe with you, I was safe with him, all of you! Made me feel safe! I didn't care! Jasper made a mistake he didn't mean it, it was my fault I should have been more careful. I didn't mean. AH keep me out of harms way? But yet you leave me to Victoria!" I shrieked.

"Victoria? What do you mean?"

"Like you didn't see! She's back, she's back for me, she wants mate for a mate. Edward killed James so she wants to kill me, torture me. Get back at him. Little did she know that I was so disposable. He threw me away like the rest of the trash! That was torture enough." I cried. I couldn't believe her, I shouldn't, but I wanted to. She wanted to stay with me, she didtn want to leave me.

"Oh Bella, please listen to me, he loves you, he did what he thought was right he did what he had to, to keep you safe, if any of us for even for a minute thought Victoria would come looking for you, we wouldn't of left you alone. To survive and put your life in the hands of werewolves! Never in a million years did any of us think you would be in any danger. That was the whole point in leaving. To keep you from danger." She was shaking her head now, she looked mad. "I cant believe this, I told him I knew! I knew you were a danger magnet, I told him you were safe with us, I told I tried, he didn't listen, I told him that it wouldn't work, that you wouldn't be safe. Your never safe, walking across the street your less safe than a two year old! But now he knows best, he's Edward he's always right." She was ranting now. I have never seen her like this. "Oh Bella, I am soooo sorry, please forgive me, I should have looked after you, I should have tried to look for.. But Edward made me promise not to get in it he made me promise not to pry. Not to look, I didn't always listen but I shouldn't have listened at all. I'm so sorry." she cried, and if I wasn't sure before I was positive now, if she could cry, she would drown us both. She placed her hands on my arms. And I turned over on my side to face her.

"I, Alice." I sat up, and put my arms around her neck. I was hugging her, I dint think I would ever see her again, let alone touch her, and now I was hugging her. "Alice, it's ok."

"No its not ok, I shouldn't have been so naive, I wanted to believe it was for the best. Its not ok Bella, but ill make it up to you some how I promise. Ill take you shopping and get you pointless thins you don't need but want."

"It's ok Alice, and you can make it up to me by _not _taking me shopping." I grinned.

"Oh Bella, I thought you were dead, I am so relieved. Oh, everyone else will be awaiting my call. They will love to see you again Bella, it broke everyone's heart. Including his." I just grinned halfheartedly at her, I don't know if I could forgive him like that. After all it was only after his orders that they left. I didn't know if I was ready to see them all though. I had cried enough for one day. "Alice not .."

"Ah your coming I see it, Esme is going to be thrilled." ok maybe I could cry some more today. I sighed. We just sat there for a while hugging each other. I was the first to break the silence.

"Alice?"

"Yes Bella""

"Why did Edward throw Jacob into the wall, and why did you guys burst my door down?" I was curious, what could possible be the reason behind that if they thought me to be dead.

**A/N please review, tell me how I'm doing, and what you think. Or what you think should happen or go on… **

**I love your input. I'm not only writing this story for me but also for all you readers out there.. And if your idea doesn't fit right with this story hell ill make another one lol… **


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6: Reason to exist**

"Bella, we thought you were dead when I saw you jump, I didn't think we'd make it in time. But I had to be sure. And if we didn't, then I needed to be there for Charlie. But when we got here we were going to just stop and see if Charlie was here and wait. But then Edward smelled you. And then we heard screaming and we heard you yell for someone to get off. He didn't think he just acted on instinct."

"Oh." I couldn't think of anything else to say, oh seemed to do fine. "Ed.. He thought I was hurt?"

"We both did, you didn't sound normal you sounded strained."

"We were joking and he fell on top of me and knocked the wind out of me."

"There's always an explanation." she said quietly.

"Where's, Where is he?" She sighed, she looked reluctant to tell me. "Please?"

"He saw how hurt you were, and knew he was the reason behind it all. And then you hit him and he, I could see the hurt in his eyes, but he left, he didn't want to bring you anymore pain." She closed her eyes, and sighed again. "He's in the meadow."

**Edwards POV:**

I was laying in the middle of our meadow. God how I longed for her warmth to come, I knew it never would. I had left, for a second time. But she wanted me to, she screamed at me she hit me!

I felt as though I had been ripped into a thousand pieces. Everyone of them at different parts of the earth, and only _she _could put me back together.

My world had fallen apart. I could imagine her sweet breath, her eyes; chocolate, my holy sin. Her pale body, twisting as she slept. Oh, how I longed to touch her sweet face, kiss her crimson lips, and stroke her silky hair.

I imagined her, Her lovely taste of freesia. I could only imagine.

The truly sad part was, I couldn't sleep. I couldn't dream about her. I could not fall into a slumber to escape the vile pain that filled every vein in my body. I missed the steady beat of her melodic heart, it was the most beautiful piece of music I had have ever heard.

I told Bella we never sleep, which is true. I believed I never dreamed because I couldn't dream, but I discovered my thinking flawed. I didn't dream in the normal sense, but every time I closed my eyes, my memories create indelible images so real that I watch my time with Bella constantly replaying itself. If they are dreams, they will fade, but I know they won't; yet they are still dreams because I can never make them a part of my life again.

I had one chance at heaven and I gave it up. I left the angel of my life and have since lived in hell every day. I don't have nightmares, but my visions can very well pass for nightmares. Whenever I close my eyes, I see Bella. Her deep expressive eyes, her soft luscious kissable lips, her heady blush, and her extremely desirable body, but then the vision alters and I see someone with her, and he is enjoying the physical relationship with Bella that I was denied. In those moments, my anger flares up and the need to destroy something overwhelms me. I've learned not to range to far from wooded areas, so when the compulsion consumes me, I have a place to go. Now I see her with Jacob. She no longer belonged to me.

My eyes ached with the need of tears. she didn't want me anymore. How's that for ironic, that's what she had said to me. And now it was true for her. She no longer wanted me. She screamed, no she freaked when she saw me. But she cried, maybe there still was hope. I could dream right? Ha I laughed at the thought. Crying didn't mean she wanted me, didn't mean she still felt something. She cried for small things, when she was angry. So maybe she was angry with me. Of course she was, who wouldn't be. Anger was a good thing, you needed emotion for anger. I just hoped it was backed up by the emotion I so needed her to feel, love. I needed her to still love me.

I never had a day go by, a minute go by that I wasn't thinking about her I needed her to realize that, but how. It had been so long. Maybe to long. Maybe she wouldn't understand. She had to I had to make her understand. It was for the best. But it wasn't really, werewolves, out of all the people in the world, out of all the towns in the world. They had to be in forks,. And Jacob black of all people. She really was a magnet for danger.

The images I got from Jacob weren't happy ones. He was making me see what I had done to her. What I put her through, what I still am putting her through. And the kiss, she kissed a dog. Ugh. Why was I so stupid. I put her through so much pain, and he made me see it. How can I live with my self knowing that's what I left her. in I did that to her. She loved me for real, true love, even though I was a monster she still did, and I broke her. I killed her.

All those thoughts, plus the realization that Bella's love was true and I threw it away, were bad enough, but what made it even worse was that every time I closed my eyes I saw Bella's face. Every expression, every feeling, and every endearing feature crossed before my eyes. It was like watching a rerun of the times I saw her. The first being in the biology class when I saw the monster I was reflected in her eyes. That was the first vision to cause a sharp stabbing pain in my chest. I knew what I was, and I knew I was a danger to Bella, but I had never meant to play a role in her death. I had tried so hard to prevent her demise. She wasn't really dead, she was like me, empty, lifeless.

The vision Alice had still played its way in my thoughts to, she had jumped. But how was she still alive. It didn't matter she was here, she was alive, breathing. that's all that mattered. When I had first saw her jump I couldn't think straight. All I could thing was I failed her. I would never again be able to catch her if she stumbled and fell. She had fallen for the last time and I had let her down by not protecting her. Although, I had never imagined that I would need to protect Bella from herself. But she was here, for some unexplained reason, either Alice was horrible wrong or something else had happen. It was like a sick game.

Torture me more, make me think she's dead, for even that tiniest moment. It was like my world was being ripped apart. I couldn't think that way, she was here, she was alive. I had to think of something, I had to do something say anything to get her to realize why I had left. Why I had done what I did. No I needed to leave I cant go back to her, what if she's moved on, what if she's happy. What if she found someone else.

I on the other hand will never find anyone else I will love, no one other than Bella. She is my other half and no one will ever replace her. I know this is true and there is no changing this fact. It's been a year since I said goodbye. that's long enough for things to change. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do leaving her, and Bella's reaction was not what I had expected. That is something I'll never forget about Bella; she never reacted the way I expected, or the way any other human would have reacted. I had waited for her to break out in tears and maybe even yell at me, but she didn't. If I could only have heard her thoughts, it would have been easier to know what to say to have made it easier for her.

It also surprised me that she so easily accepted the idea that I didn't want her in my life.

My life, that is a joke — I don't have a life. That's what I'd been trying to make Bella understand; I wasn't alive, I just existed. I want more for her then that, but the fact that she honestly believed I didn't love her is hard to fathom. How could she not know that leaving her was the hardest decision I've ever had to make? That when I turned my back on her I was ripping my own heart out. It was like dying all over again.

If I ever thought my existence was lonely before, it was nothing to what it is now. Before, I had thought I could be complete in myself and be happy, but now, when I watch the others together, I know I'll never be complete because I ripped myself away from the only person, in all eternity, who can make me complete. Now I see an eternity of darkness, misery, and loneliness looming on my horizon. I made a promise to her, I cant put myself in her life again, I cant put her in danger. But what am I thinking she's already in danger. Werewolves of all things!

No I had to go back, I had to go and beg for forgiveness, I had to make Bella see that I did it because I loved her to much to put her in danger. I had to go back I needed Bella. My life my reason to go on.. My only reason for anything. How can I make her understand I love her, I always have, I never stopped. I lied to her, to protect her.

She would never understand. But I had to try. She was my reason to exist.

**A/N: please read and review tell me how I'm doing, let me know what you think. Do you like Edwards POV? **

**And a heads up, I have updated this quickly. And will continue to do so. Except there will be no updates for 3 days. I leave tomorrow.. (Friday) for the weekend and will return Sunday.. And I will continue there after to update frequently. At least one chapter a day. Unlike today I had nothing else to do so I as a writing machine and got the first 6 chapters out. Kudos to me! YAY lol.. Hope your enjoying so far. Again let me know whatcha think!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7: Meadow**

"Bella. Please come out, talk to me." Jacob begged, I sighed and got off the bed. And opened he door.

"Thank god!" He scooped me up into a big bear hug. Alice didn't like that much, but she didn't make a noise. He finally placed me back on my own feet, and I turned to look at Alice.

"Your sure? The meadow?" I asked, she closed her eyes and began to shake her head/

"Yes he has no immediate want to leave. If he had it his way he'd lay there forever sulking in self pity." she told me, although I could have done without the last part. I didn't want to hear that he was hurt and upset. It would make talking to him more difficult. But I knew it must be done. I had to talk to him again. I had no choice. It was inevitable, if I didn't go, he would surely come find me. And if not him, I'm sure some one else would force us together.

"Bella, no, you cant!" Jacobs frustration toward me locking him out abruptly turned to anger the moment I mentioned going to see Edward. "Don't do this please. Your stupid if you go."

"Shes stupid if she doesn't go dog, she loves him! And your stupid for trying to make her think she doesn't!" Alice hissed and flashed Jacob her teeth.

"She loves me too, he left her, he left her here to rot in hell. And I will be damned if I let him do that to her again!" he was snarling and shaking, I wondered how much longer he could control himself in the presence of his enemy.

"Ha don't make me laugh mongrel I mean it, stay out of it, back of, and go home and lick your wounds. You will never be more than a friendly pet to Bella!"

"Both of you enough! This is my decision and I'm going. I'm sorry Jake I love him, and I love you but as I have said before its not enough. I'm sorry I need to at least talk to him, I owe him that."

"Bella, you owe him nothing, he left you, her broke your heart into a million pieces! He left you broken and bitter and your just going to go running back to him?"

"Do you see me running Jake? I just need to talk to him. There's so many questions, and he is the only one who can answer me truthfully."

"Bella he lied to you, he told he wouldn't leave, and he did. What makes you think you can trust him?"

"I don't know, I don't know if I can but I at least need to find out some answers. Please Jake, I'll be back, just go home. I'll call you when I get home."

"Bella, no, don't do this, Please!" he was pleading now. I felt bad but I didn't know what else to do, what else to say to him to make him realize I needed to talk to Edward. I needed answers.

"I'm sorry Jake." he shook his head. And grabbed me in a hug again, and before I could do anything or say anything I felt his warm soft lips upon mine once again, and Alice growling in the background. I tried to push away but it was no use. Alice growled louder at the sight of me struggling to get free. Jacob pulled away and growled back.

"Don't Bells, stay with me. Please."

"I cant, I'm sorry. And I went to walk away. But decided against it, I looked up at Jake and saw the hurt in his eyes. I knew I was the reason he was in pain. I stood on my tipy toes and reached his cheek, and kissed him softly on the cheek. And whispered I was sorry.

"I'm sorry I have to, you know how I feel, now please understand."

I grabbed Alice and walked away. Leaving Jake probably no doubt shocked and hurt.

"Bella." Alice said as we walked outside and I was about to climb up into my truck. "let me take you, it will be faster." I just stared at her blankly. Not really sure if I wanted to go through the nausea again. Or if I wanted Alice to go at all. No doubt she realized I was hesitant. "I will run you the way there and drop you off right out of Edwards hearing, and he wont be able read my mind either. And I will point you in the direction to go. It would get you there faster. Just close your eyes."

"Ok, but will you stay there and wait for me?" she looked confused, but agreed anyway. I didn't really want to tell her that I might not want to stay there with Edward. I still wasn't sure what I wanted to do. Or say for that matter. He left, he had left me here alone and broken. And it didn't bother him that it would hurt me for him to leave. He thinks its for my own good but I know different, he didn't feel what I felt when he had left me. It felt like I was torn into a million pieces, and no one would ever be able to fix me, to put the pieces back into place. It was like I was one big puzzle or problem, no one would ever figure out and make right, because only he had the solution. I must have been so in my thoughts because I didn't even realize when Alice had lifted me on her back and took off running, all I knew now was the trees were whipping by, and I felt the breeze in my hair. No doubt when I got close enough he would be able to smell me.

"Were here." She lifted me off her back and placed me on the forest floor. I kneeled down and tried to regain my composure. I felt dizzy, sick maybe. I didn't know whether it was from Alice quick speed, or from just the sheer knowledge that I would soon be standing in front of Edward again. "Your going to want to walk straight that way." she said and pointed toward a small opening of light. "I'll be here waiting I guess." she looked annoyed but said nothing. I started walking, trying not to stumble. All the while having battles in my own mind. Should I forgive him? Tell him all is forgotten it was nothing, for my own good. But then the thoughts of how broken I had been fly in, and I become bitter. No he should beg, get down on his knees at my feet and beg for my forgiveness. How could he leave me? Why would he make a promise to me and not keep it. Maybe Jake was right. I forgive him now, and something comes along again and he gets freaked, and decides to leave. Taking my entire life, my entire existence with him. I couldn't do it, I couldn't go through that again. I might just decide to fling myself off a cliff and really drown this time. No its Edward he thought he was doing what was best, he left because it was the only thing he could think of to do to protect me, the only thing that he felt right doing. Ugh but he still left, he still left be broken behind repair. I finally made it to a clearing, and then I saw it, my sparkling glistening Edward laying in the middle of the clearing. And all my bitter thoughts flew out the window. I took in a deep breath, and continued toward him. He was still laying there. It looked like he was mumbling to himself, about what I couldn't hear. I had never seen him like this, he looked so out of place, like he didn't know what to do. It looked like any wrong move would scare him away, so I took my time careful not to trip. I sighed, he was still as beautiful as ever. But he some what looked like I did, a bit, well, a bit broken. Why was he broken, what did he have to be broken about, he left on his own free will. I didn't send him away. I stopped, I couldn't do this, it was hard enough just to stand here and look at him, let alone talk to him. For if he left again I would surely die. To broken to do anything, but that, die. I couldn't live through that pain of him leaving again. I went to turn around, and the wind. God really didn't want me to escape this on harmed. The breeze whipped my hair around my face. I saw Edward tense, his eyes shot open. And soon he was leaning on his arms to hold himself up. And he was looking right at me, those topaz eyes cut deep. My dreams didn't do him justice. He was so god like it should be illegal. I had no other choice, I walked forward.

"Bell, Bella?" He looked nervous, scared even. I chuckled to myself at the thought, a vampire, scared, of me. "I, are you, uh hi."

"Hi." I could do hi, I could say hi. I really needed to stop gawking at him. It was un natural, unhealthy, I would have these visions these images in my head, and it would take all my effort to fight them away when he was gone.

"Are you ok?" and he was on his feet. God why did he have to be so fast. It startled me. "Sorry, I, I didn't mean to.."

"It's fine."

**EDWARDS POV**

AH, I could smell her, my mind, my body just rejoiced in her presence. It was like nothing I could have ever imagined. She was here right in front of me, so close I could reach out and touch her. No I mustn't. Control yourself Edward, I thought to my self. But I could feel all my will to keep it in failing me, and fast. And in the next second I had her wrapped in my arms, lifting her off her feet, before I realized what I was doing. I placed her gently back on the ground. It was moments like this that I wish I could read her mind. God did I wish I could know what she was thinking. What she wanted me to do. What she wanted me to say. Ugh what was I going to say to her, I left Bella I'm sorry but I had to? It was for your own good. No she wouldn't believe me, would she? Ugh she was beautiful, maybe even more beautiful than she was before. But there was something off, something, she wasn't my happy Bella, she seemed to be filled with sorrow, almost empty. God I had don't that to her. I needed to say something I cant just stare at her.

"Bella. I, didn't mean to, it was a reaction, I'm just so, relieved and happy to see you. When I thought you were. I mean when Alice got that vision I thought, I thought I had lost you." Her face dropped, maybe I shouldn't have said that, said anything, maybe I should have just run, when I saw her just ran left before I could cause her anymore pain.

"Edward." hearing her say my name startled me, god I haven't heard that voice, that wonderful beautiful voice of an angel in forever. "You, I mean, ugh!" she looked mad now. I wanted to comfort her tell her it was ok, but I knew I couldn't, I shouldn't. "Edward, you did that on your own free will, you didn't loose me, you never could. Instead you chose to leave me. You chose that. Not me! WHY? What did I ever do you to?" She came forward and tried to shove me, tried to push me, I think to hurt me, she must have forgotten I was hard, because she came with such a force I didn't even feel it, but I knew her arms did. "All I did was support you and love you, I wanted to be with you Edward, but obviously you didn't want to be with me, so please, don't tell me you thought you lost me when Alice had the vision, because you had lost me on your own will a year ago!" she was sobbing now, tears rolling down her face. I wanted to wipe her tears away, but I knew I was the reason they fell.

"Oh Bella, sweet innocent Bella, that is not close to the truth, I did loose you, and yes I did leave on my own free will, I chose to leave to protect you, nothing more." Oh god I loved the look on her face. It spoke of her confusion, her desire to understand, and something bordering on what might, if I was lucky, be love. "I love you Bella so much I left knowing I would leave my life, my heart with you." she looked confused, why should she be confused.

"You what?"

"don't you remember anything I told you before?"

"I remember everything!" her voice rose on the last part. "But you, What? You told me! You told me you didn't love me anymore,." She was shaking her head over and over again, and then all of a sudden she was hitting me over and over again in the chest. She was in so much pain, I had never seen her in this so much pain, well yes I have thanks to Jacob. I grabbed her in a hug trying to hold back the rage she felt, the pain. Everything I wish I could just take it all away. "Everything you ever said to me was a lie! You never loved me! If you did you wouldn't of left me! You didn't want me!" She screamed at me tears streaming down her face. And I could do nothing to stop them nothing to suppress the anger within her the angst she was felling was my doing. I didn't think she would believe me but she did. She did think that. I was utterly shocked that she couldn't see right through me and know what was in my heart. How could she accept that I was callous enough to declare my love and then so quickly lose it? I found that concept unbelievable. She readily accepted the idea that I never truly loved her; she honestly thought I had lied when I told her I loved her. I didn't know which hurt more, the fact that I almost lost her, or at least thought I had. or that she so easily believed I was so callous enough to profess a love that I never felt. I mean, even though I wanted her to think I didn't want her anymore – only to discover I couldn't survive without – I didn't want her to think I never loved her, and I guess, I also didn't want it to be so easy for her to except.

The love I had professed to her before was spoken sincerely and honestly.

I was looking as deeply as possible into her eyes trying to read her thoughts to discover what was confusing her, and then I remembered what she said earlier that she remembered everything. It was what I said to her in the woods outside her house when I had tried to make my leaving easier on her; I had lied to her, and she had believed me. Amazing, I thought. I tell her I love her and she doesn't believe me. I tell her I don't love her and she instantly believes the lie. How is that possible?

"I'm a good liar, Bella, I have to be." That must be it, otherwise she would have seen right through the lie.

I felt her entire body tense up and then a tremor rippled through her. It felt as though she were ready to – I wasn't sure what she was ready to do, but it didn't feel like a good thing, but before she could continue, I gently shook her shoulders trying to get her to listen, "Let me finish! I'm a good liar, but still, for you to believe me so quickly," I felt my own pain rip through me but I continued, "That was . . . excruciating."

She was still rigid, but she seemed to be listening, so I began to explain, "When we were in the forest, when I was telling you goodbye," I felt her tense even more and it worried me. I found myself whispering as I continued, "You weren't going to let go, I could see that." The memory was so vivid, and the details so clear. I could see her lovely face staring up at me almost pleading with me to stay, or at least to take her with me. That was the face I saw when I thought she was dead. That look of hurt and pain kept reminding me of what a monster I was.

"I didn't want to do it, it felt like it would kill me to do it," and it had almost killed her, If Alice's account was true, and what I saw was true, she didn't just jump for fun, there was another purpose a hidden meaning. "But I knew that if I couldn't convince you that I didn't love you anymore, it would just take you that much longer to get on with your life. I hoped that, if you thought I'd moved on, so would you." And maybe she had, maybe she would now tell me there was no room left in her life for me. She as with Jacob. Uh werewolves what I had I left her with.

Very softly, I heard her whisper, "A clean break."

"Exactly. But I never imagined it would be so easy to do! I thought it would be next to impossible you would be so sure of the truth that I would have to lie through my teeth for hours to even plant the seed of doubt in your head. I lied, and I'm so sorry, sorry because I hurt you, sorry because it was a worthless effort. Sorry that I couldn't protect you from what I am. I lied to save you, and it didn't work. I'm sorry." But I wasn't sorry that I hadn't lost her permanently; for that I was heartily thankful to whatever providence made it possible that both Alice and myself were wrong, and that Bella was before me alive.

"But how could you believe me?" It was the one question I asked myself during those first months of separation. "After all the thousand times I've told you I love you, how could you let one word break your faith in me?" I wondered, Had she ever truly believed I loved her? Will she be able to accept the truth that I still love her?

Bella only stared at me offering no response, which led me to conjecture that she still might think I was lying to her. Her eyes had almost the same look I had seen that night in the forest when she believed the villainous lie that poured out of my wicked mouth.

"I could see it in your eyes, that you honestly believed that I didn't want you anymore. The most absurd, ridiculous concept," I thought my world could never be the same without her in it, as though I could continue without her near me, or I near her; I had to admit what everyone else in the family had all known, Bella and I were a perfect match. In all truthfulness I added with as much feeling as possible, "As if there were any way that I could exist without needing you!"

Her eyes were still glazed over and she was not responding to anything I had said. If only she would cry, or scream at me; something to let me know she had heard what I was telling her. As the seconds dragged on, I became worried. Alice had told me on one of my visits, well not really told me but I saw the vision she had about Bella going into to a catatonic state after I left, and I couldn't afford to have that happen now because there were too many questions left to be answered. I shook her shoulder again in an attempt to draw some response from her. I would even be happy if she were to yell at me and tell me to leave; at least I would know she was still conscious of what was happening around her.

If only I knew what she was thinking. As it was, my nerves were sitting on razor sharp edges, and she still hadn't told me why she believed my lies. "Bella," it came out as one long sigh. "Really, what were you thinking?"

It was becoming harder with every passing minute. My words were so softly spoken I was afraid she might not hear them, but try as I might, I could speak no louder because the pain was threatening to overwhelm me. I felt as if I could barely draw in enough air to form coherent sounds. It was as if I were losing her all over again and once more my life would be meaningless and void of every good thing this amazing woman once offered to me. "Why can you believe the lie, but not the truth?"

Her response was astonishing. "It never made sense for you to love me, I always knew that." Her voice broke up as she spoke.

She had told me once before that she saw herself as plain and unattractive, and I remembered telling her she didn't see her true self, and she definitely didn't see her own worth as a person deserving of love. Instead, she saw herself as unworthy to be loved by me when just the opposite was true. What never really made any sense to me was why an angel like her would ever love a monster like me. I had to prove to her how much I truly loved her, and that she definitely was awake. The only solution I found was something I had wanted to do even before I left her house. In fact it was the first thing I wanted to do as soon as I saw her.

"I'll prove to you that I love you Bella, I always have and I always ALWAYS will," and I wanted to add 'and that I love you with every fiber of my being.' Both were a promise I wanted to put in the kiss I would give her. But I didn't want to say to much.

I took her radiantly lovely face between my cold hands and held her tight enough so she couldn't turn away from my kiss. Her warm sweet lips on mine, ah it was heaven all over again. Oh how I missed this, I felt her cheeks flush I looked down sure enough they were red. God I loved that. Her hair was still whipping in the wind, and it made the smell even that much more unbearable. But it was a good unbearable. I had no thirst, at least not thirst for her blood. It fell like minutes hours were passing. Even though when it was over it didn't seem, it didn't feel long enough.

"Edward, I, I can't, I mean I, oh.." she collapsed onto the ground in heavy sobs. All I could was grab her, and hold her. I rubbed her back soothingly trying to console her. I didn't know what else to do. What was she going to say? She cant what? Oh god did she have someone? Had she moved on? Was I to late? Please god don't let me be to late! If you cant grant be access to your kingdom please don't take Bella away from me now.

"Edward, please I cant do this, not now. I'm sorry." she cried, if I could cry, god how I wished the tears that I wanted to fall so bad, maybe it would help her see that I meant every word I was saying now.

"Do what? Bella, answer me one thing. Please" I was begging now, pleading with her, pleading for me not to be to late.

"Anything." she said softly it was almost a whisper. And I was sure if I didn't have super sensitive hearing, I would have completely missed it.

"Am I to late? Do you not love me anymore?"

"How? What? Are you stupid! Of course your not Edward, I love you, so much. Who would I move on with? How could I move on?" I could see the pain in her eyes but just the thought that I doubted her.

"I just had to be sure, I knew, but I mean I saw you and Jacob and I'm sorry."

"Were friends Edward, he was just there for me, when I needed someone."

"I'm so terribly sorry, you will never ever in a million years understand how truly sorry I am. I understand if you never want to speak with me again, after all I have done to you it is the least I deserve. If you will allow me however, I would like a chance to explain my actions to you. You at least deserve to know the truth. I don't expect you to forgive me, what I did was unforgivable.

Please know that everything I told you in the forest that day was a falsity, as I said before, I didn't mean any of it. I thought that by leaving I would ensure your safety. Every moment you spent with me I was putting you in more and more danger, simply by being there." She rolled her eyes at my last words, she obviously didn't understand how dangerous I could be, how being with me was just dangerous. Did she not remember her birthday? "I expected that you would move on and have a happy normal human life. The possibility that your human life might not be happy, never crossed my mind. I am so truly sorry Bella I thought it would be easy for you." She wanted to say something but I put my finger over her lips and gently silenced her. "Please let me finish. Bella you know, I am essentially a selfish creature. If Alice would not have had that vision I would have come back anyway. You would have seen opened your door or your window in a few days, and see me on my knees begging for your forgiveness. I was not at all happy. I was empty everyone around me thought I was lifeless. I couldn't put my family through that, I left them also Bella, I couldn't take there thoughts of pity and telling me it would be ok. Because I knew it would never be ok again, not with out you. But I every time I told myself you needed me, I needed you. I also told myself I made you a promise, not to come back. My control of staying away was slowly diminishing. I would have returned in a few days. As I'm sure Alice had already had a vision of me returning to you. Before she had the one of you jumping." I sighed, I still didn't know what that other meaning to her jumping was, but I figured this wasn't the time to ask. She was still looking at me, looking for something more? I didn't know. But I went on.

"I've never stopped loving you, and I think of you constantly. I don't deserve your forgiveness, but know that you are still the most important thing in my world. I apologize for my idiocy. But Bella, please, forgive me, I never meant to hurt you, that was the last thing I ever wanted to do. " hmm all that was a very accurate description of my feelings, if only because no words existing can describe the way I feel. There is no way I can depict exactly how deeply I regret my actions or even how much I love her. The anger and remorse I feel are no easy matter to convey.. I wasn't at all satisfied with what I had just said, but what else more could I say to make her understand. I knew my love for Bella would never end or decrease, but had her feelings faded at all? Would she be able to forgive me, take me back?

She looked satisfied, I think. She looked less sad. I just hoped it was enough. She didn't know what to say, I could tell by the look in her beautiful eyes she was at a loss for words.

"Bella please let me make it up to you, tell me what I can do, to make you forgive me, to let you be able to forgive what I have done to you, what I have put you through. I know I may never be able to, but please let me try. I miss you Bella Marie Swan, so much. I cant live without you." I was pleading, begging for her to take me back, if she would have me, I would gladly provide for her every whim just for the privilege of being in her life again.

"Edward, I forgive you. But the fact that you thought you leaving me would be so easy for me to forget, so easy for me to get over. Makes me think you didn't realize how much I truly needed you, how much I still do need you. I love you so much Edward but I cant do this again. I cant go through this again." She was crying again, I could see the pain in her eyes. I wanted nothing more than to take that pain away from her. But I knew I couldn't.

"You cant be around vampires anymore. In danger anymore." I sighed. She laughed, it caught me off guard, I looked at her puzzled.

"Why does everyone think I am always in danger? You left and that didn't help! I can handle danger as long as you are around I know I am safe, you didn't have to leave. I was safe with you!" She was breathing deep, trying to catch her breath, and keep calm. "And I can be around vampires Edward. But the fact you think I cant is exactly why I cant do this again, not right now. I can be around vampires. I'm not afraid, I'm used to it. There all my family. But what I cant do again, is loose them I cant have them leave. The pain is unbearable I cant go through that again. I don't think my heart can take it. I would die." I was shocked that's all it was, she's afraid I'm going to leave her again. Were going to leave again. Thank god.

"Bella, I am not going anywhere, as long as you'll have me, I will be here. I'm not going anywhere, unless you send me away. Where you go I go. And vise versa. I wont make the same mistake twice. I will never leave you! Not again. Not ever." I vowed to her, and I knew I couldn't leave her again. I didn't have enough strength to go through that all over again either. She was shaking her head, I didn't understand.

"No, you say that now Edward." she was crying, it took all I had to understand what she was saying through the sobs. "But what if a few, weeks from now." she took a deep breath, this cant be good. " What if another vampire comes after me, besides Victoria, there curious abut why a human is around you and they don't like me. Or what if Jasper takes another snap at me!" Ah she did remember, I flinched at those words, that was one of the main reasons we had left. Why I had packed my stuff and left her. Even my family threatened her. "What then? I cant go through that pain again, I cant do it!" She was shaking she was sobbing so hard. I did the only thing that I could think to do. I pulled her onto my lap and held her tight, trying to take away the pain will the pain away.

"That's not going to happen Bella, I wont let anything come between us again, not even my own stupidity. Please believe me, No matter what happens what comes our way, we can get through it together."

"Edward, its not that I don't believe you" she cried. "I just don't trust that, you still with it!" she rubbed her face into my chest. God why did I leave her, why did I do this to her. To me?

"Bella, I love you so much, I am not going anywhere ever again, unless you go with me. You are my world, my life, my reason to exist. And I will spend the rest of my days proving to you just that. And that I will not leave you again. I will take you with me. I promise." she nodded her head, I think. "I'll give you however much time you need me to prove to you."

She looked up at my face. "Edward, you may have forever, but I don't." She said glumly. I could see, and tell by the sound of her voice she wanted forever, she wanted eternity, whether eternity for me to prove it, or eternity just to be with me I didn't know, I'm going with the latter though.

"I know you don't have forever Bella, but if I'm with you it will feel like forever."

"Well what if I.." she froze. "Never mind." God why cant I read her mind? If there was any god at all, he would give me what time she had left, cause she was right, I have eternity I have forever. Bella is mortal, human, she has as many years as her life grants her.

"Please, Bella, Tell me."

"No, I don't want you to get mad at me."

"I could never be mad at you."

"well you'll be upset, or you'll get sad, I know you Edward."

"Isabella, tell me, I don't want you to ever be afraid to tell me anything, to tell me how you feel or what your thinking. Remember I cant tell." I tapped my temple and grinned the crooked smile I knew she loved. "So I want you to know you can tell me anything, no matter what.""Ok." She frowned, and looked away from. Again not a good sign. "What if I want forever? What if I want eternity. Eternity with you, as, a." She took a deep breath and sighed.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N it was a fun weekend, i still wrote 2 full chapters. i am working on the 9th chapter right now so it should be up by the end of the day. PLEASE let me know what you think.. ****especially about the edward and bella part. do you think i made bella to mean? should she run back to edward just like that and forget everything. or did you like how i made it. she loves him, and wants him but she cant trust him, not yet. or was that still to easy for edward? i love the new moon. but i still think she took him back way to easily.. but i also didnt want to make bella a complete bitch lol.. but still LEMME KNOW WHAT YA THINK! also if you have any ideas or oppinions or where you want or think the storie should go and what should happen.**

******PLEASE AND THANK YOU!! **

**Chapter 8: Untrustworthy**

**BELLAS POV**

"As a vampire!" I blurted out, I couldn't hold it in any more, he had to know what I wanted, I not only wanted him but I wanted eternity, eternal damnation. If you could even call any kind of life with Edward in it damned. Or hell for that matter, it was the complete opposite. It was heaven, hear on earth. I felt him tense up, and his face wiped of all emotion. His mouth curved into a tight line. I thought I saw his lip twitch but I couldn't be sure. Everything was silent for, what felt like hours. I couldn't hold it in anymore. The pent up anger and bitterness overcame all other emotions I had at the moment. "Why is hat so hard to understand? Instead of leaving me, you could have changed me! Why didn't you change me! Do you not want me for eternity? Do you think your going to get bored of me? Is that why you left? I know, I know it was for my own good, but Edward I loved you, you knew how I felt! And if it was about danger, and my well being, then why not change me! Then no one could touch me!" I was sobbing again. It was all just to overwhelming. I wanted to strike out and hit him, but I held the urge, I had hurt my hand enough for one day.

"Bella, I, you know why, I couldn't, I cant change you, I will not do that to you. Its so much pain. And I wouldn't wish this life on anyone. I wont force you to choose, you can have me the way it is. Or not it is up to you."

"Your not forcing me! I want this! I want you!" I was shouting, and I could see the hurt in his eyes. "Edward please. I'm going to get old, your going to stay seventeen forever. All the while I'm just going to be getting older and older each day. How is that going to look in 10 years?" why couldn't he see this was the best idea, no one could hurt me, victoria would no longer be after me, jasper wouldn't have the urge to take a bite out of me. And Edward wouldn't have to fight the urge to drain me dry. "Please, Victoria will no longer want me dead, Jasper wont accidental take a snap at me if I cut myself, because I wont cut myself. And you will no longer be tortured every minute to not drain me dr.. dry. Pl.. please Edward, Please." I was begging, pleading. "Just think about it, at least do me that." I didn't know if he was going to listen to me or if he even agreed with what I was saying, all I knew was this was the best thing. If he couldn't see that then I might have to go over him and talk to the others. He was still, silent for long while until he finally just nodded. I could see the sadness in his eyes.

"Bella, never think that its because I don't want you. I could never get bored of you. In a million years you wouldn't bore me. I want you, forever, eternity. Its just, this isn't what I would have wanted. We didn't have a choice. This is your soul were talking about Bella, I will not take that away from you, I will not take your only chance at heaven away from you." The sadness in his eyes was overwhelming. He did want me, for eternity. But he didn't want to take my chance at heaven. The thought boggled my mind, he was my heaven.

"You just did." I said sorrow all the way through my voice. He was my heaven, without him I was in hell.

"What, what do you mean?" he was confused.

"Edward, without you, there is no such thing as heaven. Its just hell. You left I was in hell. And now your dooming me to an eternity in hell." he flinched at my words, they had hurt him.

"Bella, I, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. Bella, you cant honestly want this life?"

"I want this life, I want you in my life. This is the only way to keep you in my life, forever and eternity."

"No, I want you to have a normal human life, live out your life, grow old, ha…"

"NO!" I shouted and cut him off, how could he want me to grow old, and be an ugly old woman when he was still seventeen! "Edward no! I don't want to grow old without you, you cant grow old. There for I don't want to either. Please Edward. Please"

"Ugh Bella you don't know what your asking!"

"Yes I do, I'm just asking for you to think about it, realize that I'm right, it's the only way."

"Fine, I'll think about it, but I am not promising anything. I already know I don't want to do that to you. But for you I will think about what you said, that is the best I can do for now."

"Fine." I said glumly. He saw the hurt in my eyes and placed his arms around my waist and pulled me in close. I laid my head on his shoulder. I felt him lower his head to my hair, he breathed in deep. His chin rested on my forehead. We were like statues frozen in time for a long time. Neither one of us daring to move. And then he slowly lifted my head up to face his. And leaned down I didn't have a moment to think, the next second his cold, marble, lips gently on mine. I pulled away a few second later and shook my head. I couldn't do this, not now, not yet. I still didn't want to go through the pain of him leaving. My body and my mind wanted him, but my heart wasn't so trusting.

"I'm sorry Edward I want to, but I cant, not yet. If you…" he cut me off.

"I will not leave you again, I am a selfish creature, I know I shouldn't, continue to be around you, I'm a monster, but its what I want. I want you, I need you. I know what my limits are, I could not leave again if I wanted. The pain was unbearable. But I'll prove myself to you Bella, I'll prove my love for you, I'll prove to you that I will not ever leave again. And if I do, I will take you with me. Always." I could see the sincerity in his eyes, he meant every word. I think deep down I knew he meant every word. But I just needed to be sure, my heart needed to be sure. I nodded my head and smiled. It was all I could do, I didn't really know what to say, I didn't trust myself to say anything. Knowing my mind, an my heart both wanted two completely different things. They were fighting, one wanted to be with Edward kiss him so patiently he would never ever leave again. And the other didn't want to go through the pain of him leaving again, I didn't trust so easily anymore.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9: The Family**

**BELLAS POV**

"I should get back." I didn't really want to go, but if I stayed much longer I knew I wouldn't be able to keep my distance. He was to god like, gorgeous, beautiful.

"Will you come to the house? I know Esme and everyone, there dying to see you again. It would mean a lot to them." He smiled down at me begging me with his gorgeous topaz eyes to come.

"Sure, I guess so, I can have Alice bring me." How could I say no to a face like that.

"Uh ok, or I could pick you up." He wanted to pick me up, he wanted as much time with me as possible, I could tell by the tone in his voice, he was slightly jealous of Alice.

"Um Alice is waiting in the woods for me. She's far enough away for you not to hear her thoughts and for her not to be able to over hear."

"Oh, ok. Do you want me to take you to her?" He was sad, I didn't want to hurt him, but I couldn't ride in a car with him, and continue to keep my distance. I wanted to trust him I really did. But there was part of me that was screaming he left once.

"Ok, we can walk though." His face dropped. "I think I can only take so much super human speed for one day." I smiled up at him and he grabbed my hand and lead me to the woods. The walk was silent.

**EDWARDS POV**

She was afraid of me. She didn't want to get near me. I could tell from her eyes. She also was fight her self. Part of her wanted the same thing I did. To be in each others arms, have her warm embrace. Feel her warm cheeks flush. And look into those deep chocolate eyes forever. It was like she didn't trust herself. At least I hoped it was herself. I hoped she trusted me, and believed me. I wouldn't leave her again, ever. No matter what. I vowed to her, and to myself. Never to put her nor myself through that pain again. It was so much worse than pain, worse than death even. I wished for death during that long year. Death would have been heaven compared to that.

We walked through the woods to Alice in silence. I wanted to talk to her, tell her I love her, over and over again. But I didn't want to push my luck. She agreed to come over to see the rest of the family, and me included. She wanted me in her life. That was enough for now. Far more than I deserved. I deserved to be smacked, I deserved for her to yell at me, scream at me tell me leave. Get on my knees and beg for her forgiveness. But she was far to caring of a creature, to ever make me do that. She loved me, she still loved me. That was all that mattered. As long as she still loved me, we could get through this, through it all.

"Alice?" She was laying in the grass singing to herself. She looked bored. Apparently annoyed by not getting her and see what happen between me and Bella.

"Hey Alice, we can go back to my house now, I have to cook dinner for Charlie, and then you can take me to your house to see everyone else." I wanted to pick Bella up and take her back to my house, I wanted as much time with her as possible. The more time the better, being away from her for so long was excruciatingly painful.

"Unless you don't feel like it, I can pick her up if your not up to it." I was hopeful, hopefully Alice would know what I meant, that I wanted to be with Bella, I wanted to bring her to house, pick her up and take her home. I saw Bella's face drop a little. She didn't want me to pick her up, I frowned at Alice. Do I want to do something that is going to make Bella uncomfortable?

'Do you want me to be, busy?' I heard Alice, she was thinking so Bella wouldn't hear, even though she was a very observant person, she probably knew what we were doing. I frowned back at her again and shook my head. I wanted Bella to be comfortable. Me picking her up would not have been comfortable for her, I could tell she wanted Alice to come get her.

"No Edward that's fine, I can bring her, I'd like to see Charlie again." Alice smiled at Bella. And as they got ready to lave.

As much as it hurt to let her go. I was comforted by the fact I was going to see her in a few hours at my house.

**BELLAS POV**

I didn't even notice I was home until Alice slid me off her back. It was like my mind was somewhere else entirely. Back to Edward in the meadow. The sun sparkling off his god like figure. His cold gently lips against mine. God how I wanted to stay like that forever. But how could I? what if he did leave? I couldn't think about that. He promised me, but he had promised hat before, and went back on it. What was I going to do. I tried to push the entire thing out of my mind. And concentrate on cooking Charlie's dinner. But how much concentration can you give to chicken, baked potatoes and corn? Not enough to distract other thoughts from creeping into your head. Alice sudden movement to the kitchen startled me back to reality.

"Bella?" it was almost a question, I didn't like the look on her face, this wasn't going to go over well.

"Yea Alice."

"Can I talk to you? I mean without upsetting you, I don't mean to I just want to tell you what I think." Hmm. This should be good. But I did need all the advice I could get. What could it hurt?

"Sure Alice, I could use some advice. I'm at a loss." I said glumly.

"Edward's made it plain for everyone to see that he can't exist without you." She sighed. "You might be able to live without him, but he certainly can't manage without you."

I felt angry tears well up in my eyes. I was wrong this could hurt. "Live without him? You didn't see how I was Alice! Charlie thought I was getting deranged and Renee was practically going to drag me out of my room and into a plane with her if I didn't get any better soon! My friends said I was like a zombie and all the while, I felt like my heart was slowly being ripped out." The tears were now flowing freely from my cheeks.

"You may have been like that at first, Bella. But you coped with it and moved and did something. Edward though… He wasn't just making us worry. He frightened us. Even Jasper couldn't read his emotions anymore. It was like he was empty the entire time. There was nothing left. You're doing much, much better at managing." She looked at me sadly. "I saw it. You were joking, laughing with Jacob.

"I love Edward. You know that! And if you don't then your stupid." I was yelling now. How could she think that I was managing? I wasn't managing I was hiding. "I was hiding Alice, I wasn't happy, I was hiding from the pain of it all. I just need time, I love Edward, I want to be with Edward. But Alice, he left me! He left me broken! Its going to take more than a few hours to fix. Its going to take more than a few hours to repair!. I cant just heal my heart like that. I know he promises he wont leave again, but he made that promise before and broke it! How can I trust him now. I cant, I wont go through that pain again. I cant Alice, Please understand, I cant go through it again, I cant let myself get caught up in the love I have for him, unless I'm sure he isn't going to leave again."

"I see he isn't going to leave again Bella."

"Alice! You can be wrong, you have been before! You and I both know you wont see him leaving until he has decided to leave!" I was screaming,

"Bella, please calm down, I didn't want to upset you. I know you love my brother. But Bella, I know he wont leave you again, I saw what it did to him. He wouldn't choose that life again, life without you. And I know he hasn't decided to leave, but I also know he wont decide to leave, and if he does, he wont decide to leave without you."

"How do you know Alice? How do you really know?" I was sobbing now. I thought Alice was seriously mad at me. Any normal person would be, but she just came over and put her arms around me.

"Because Bella, I just do, I know my brother, and I also know I wont let him do that again." she whispered softly.

"You left me once too." I reminded her glumly. She frowned.

"Because I thought it was what was best for you. Edward told us you would be fine, you'd move on. I didn't believe him. I fought against it Bella, we all did. I told him he was stupid. But then he asked us what we would do if something terrible happen to you. If by some chance we couldn't stop it. What would we do. How would we feel. And we all knew we didn't want it to come to that. We all love you to much." I knew what she said was true, I could see her now, fighting with Edward telling him he was stupid for even considering it. But then I could also see Edward, doing and saying anything to get them to agree with him. No matter how horrible the thought was. Like my death for instance. They all thought they were doing me a favor. Little did they know they were allowing my life to be taken.

"You sure you want Charlie to know were back now?" Alice asked me, I can hear the worry in her voice. Did she know something I didn't?

"Uh yea, it's a better time than any. He's going to have to find out eventually. And if I'm to go to your house he is going to want to know where I'm going."

"Ok, because I hear him coming." She stated matter a fact. Sure enough I heard Charlie's cruiser doors slam shut. I almost felt like fainting, when I heard the door open.

"Bells?"

"Yea dad, in here." My voice was shaky, I just hoped he didn't hear it.

"Dinner smells great Bells!"

"Thanks dad." I said as he walked through the kitchen and froze. His eyes got wild looking when he saw Alice sitting in the chair at the table, my empty plate in front of her.

"Uh, I, Hi Alice."

"Hello Charlie." he didn't look pleased, he looked shocked, scared. I doubt it was because Alice. He was scared that with Alice, came Edward.

"It's good to see you Hun." Charlie said as he came forward and gave Alice a little hug. So far so good. Now all I had to do was tell him the rest of the Cullen's were back , and I was going over to see them. Including Edward.

"Thank you Charlie its good to see you too. How have you been." Alice smiled. He was putty in her hands. Charlie grabbed his plate and walked into the living room with Alice, still talking. I hurriedly cleaned up the dishes, and the kitchen. Making sure it was spotless. So Charlie couldn't have an excuse not to let me go. Charlie came back in and handed me his dirty plate. I tried not to make eye contact with him, but he continued to stand there looking at me. I finally gave up, I looked up at him meeting his gaze. He continued to look at me. He looked puzzled, confused, wary. It was almost as if he was looking at me for a sign of weakness, like I was about to break down. Turn into the lifeless form he once knew me to be. I smiled up at him. As I turned back to clean of his dish. I heard him turn and leave the room.

I walked into the living room, and heard them talking about the game that was on TV. How Alice knew anything about it, astounded me. But I let it go. I walked over and sat down next to Charlie on the couch. And sighed. I had to tell him we were leaving now, to go see the rest of the Cullen's.

"Dad." I paused, how to word this so he wont freak out. "I'm going to go with Alice. Back to her house to see Esme and Carlisle." I figured leave Edward and everyone else out. Mention of Alice's parents would go over better than 'I'm going to see Edward and everyone else.' I figured the less he knew right now the better.

"Bella, I, uh." He looked over at Alice, she continued to smile as she looked up at him. "I, uh ok. Just don't be out to late." Oh my god, he agreed, no fight. I went upstairs to grab my jacket and came back downstairs and Alice was at the door. Telling Charlie she would see him later.

"Bella. Can I talk to you for a minute. In private." He looked at Alice she nodded her head and walked outside and shut the door. Ugh this wasn't going to be good. We were so close.

"Yes dad?"

"Bella, I don't think this is a good idea. What if, I mean. You know.. He mit…"

"Edward will be there, there's no might about it. There all back and there staying." I cut him off, I was annoyed.

"Bella."

"Dad." He finally sighed and opened the door for me.

"Just be careful Bella, remember what happen last time."

"Dad, you don't know everything. And I haven't forgotten. Ill be home later." I shut the door behind me not letting him to say anything in reply. He didn't know everything, if he did he defiantly wouldn't let me go. Hell if I told him the truth, he'd have me locked up in a rubber room. "Ready to go Alice?" I smiled up at her. I was as ready as I would ever be.

We arrived, and I just stood outside. Staring at there old house. I remembered the last time I was here. It looked like a ghost house. You figured it would be creepy with vampires living in it. But it was as far from creepy. It was more stunning than I remembered. I sighed as I stood there looking at the door. Not really wanting to move.

Alice put her hand on the small of my back. As we walked toward the door. It swung open and Esme came rushing out, down the stairs into the yard, embracing me in a huge hug. I hugged her back. I smiled up at her. As Carlisle came out and smiled down at me as he put his arm on my shoulder. I glanced up at him. And the next thing I know I was being swung around like a rag doll. And breath knocked out of me. I looked up and smiled.

"Emmet, Emmet.. Can't.. Breath." He just laughed his booming laugh and placed me on my feet. I almost tumbled over. Which made him laugh even more as he caught me by the arm. I smiled up at him as I tried to catch my breath,

"Ah we missed your corky human self." he replied with another laugh.

"Uh thanks, I think." out of the corner of my eye I saw Rosalie frown as Emmet walked over to her. She still hated me, and I had still had no idea why. But I smiled at her any way.

I turned and saw Jasper eyeing me carefully. I smiled at him. Why did he look scared. And why was Alice frowning? Had I done something wrong? And then It dawned on me. Edwards making everyone leave was an aftermath of the fact he tried to attack me. He must feel guilty. I walked slowly over to stand in front of him. Finally I hugged him. He tensed up. I didn't know if I should have hugged him or not, maybe he was fighting the urge to drain me dry again. But I saw Alice smiling. Finally he put his arms around me. And sighed.

"Bella, I."

"No, don't you dare. It's not your fault." I said weakly trying to make him understand that I didn't blame him.

"It's not yours either." Damn him and his empathy. He must have sensed that it wasn't him I blamed it was me. If I hadn't of cut my finger none of this would have ever happen. I just continued to smile up at him. We finally stepped away from each other and I saw Edward standing in the door way smiling weakly at us.

I wanted to race up the stairs, run into his arms grab him and never let go. I fought the urge. Instead I smiled at him. He smiled back, but it didn't touch his eyes. Something was bothering him. Of course something was bothering him I thought. I mean I just denied him the reunion he really wanted. The reunion I really wanted in the meadow. I told him I couldn't do it again. That I was afraid he would leave me again. Of course he wouldn't be happy.

We all walked inside and I was amazed. It looked exactly as it had a year ago.

We sat down in the living room and talked. I asked them how there old home had been, they all replied the same, they didn't like it, it wasn't home. Forks, now this was home. They told me Carlisle got his job back, the hospital welcomed him with open arms. The school allowed them to return to school. At least the ones that weren't suppose to graduate yet. That left Edward and Alice. I didn't want to ask what class they had. I think I already knew the answer. When Alice told me they were welcome back at school. I saw from the corner of my eye Edward had got a big grin on his face but when I had looked up at him, it was suddenly gone. Wiped clean.

We were finished talking and Carlisle and Esme had went upstairs. Rosalie I assume as in her room. Emmet and Jasper were playing a game. I watched intently, even though I had no idea who was who, or what was going on. It was racing game, that's all I knew. And that Edward had beaten Emmet, and refused him a rematch so Jasper took over. I looked away from the TV and saw Edward was staring at me. I tried to look away, but I wasn't fast enough. I felt my face flush red. I could have sworn I heard him suppress a laugh but I couldn't be sure.

"Bella?" I heard Carlisle call me from the top of the stairs. I glanced up.

"Yes?"

"Would you come here for a minute I want to show you something in my study."

"Ok." I got up and walked upstairs to the study.

"I didn't really want to show you something, but I also didn't want the others prying and trying to listen." He wanted to talk. About what I didn't know.

I sighed "Ok, what is it then?"

"I heard that you have befriended werewolves?"

"Yes, Jacob Black and the rest down at La Push." Was he going to try to forbid me from seeing them? I knew they were enemies but I was in the middle. It would have been a war, if it hadn't been for the treaty.

"Well as you might know we have a treaty with them. No harm from either sides. But you also know, both sides want to get Victoria. As I assume they are tracking her right now, but are having a hard time, same as myself, Emmet and Jasper. You see, she keeps running along the boundary line. When we get close to her, she goes across. And we can not follow her unless we want to break that treaty."

"Ok, I know that, well except for the fact that you guys were after her as well." I didn't like the idea of any of them going after her. Victoria was lethal. She as vicious. What if something happen to them. I knew they didn't care what happen to one another but I did.

"I was wondering if you would be able ask your friend, Jacob, or any of them if they have had any trace of her recently. We haven't sensed anything on our side."

"Sure, I can ask them next time talk to them. But she does that often. She would come and tease them a bit, testing herself. Trying to find a way in, a way to me. And then all of a sudden she would disappear again. Sometimes for weeks on end."

"Ah I see, but with us here, I doubt she will go far this time."

Carlisle was worried about me, he wanted me to be safe. He told me that someone would be looking after me and Charlie at all times. And Alice was on full alert for any special visions.

I walked back downstairs, but Edward and Alice were missing. I walked toward the kitchen and I heard them talking. I didn't want to listen, but it was very tempting. So I figured a little wouldn't hurt.

"Can I do nothing right Alice?" I heard Edward. His voice seemed uneasy. "I left to keep her safe, and instead she gets stuck with werewolves. And its … "

"It's not your fault you know." Alice cut him off.

"I thought I was the mind reader," He said to her grumpily.

"You are, but I know you to well. Its not your fault. You couldn't of known what you were leaving her with."

"I should have just listened to you. I'm Sorry Alice." He apologized for not listening to her when she said not to leave. I felt bad, he blamed himself for it all. It wasn't his fault he honestly thought he was doing what was right.

"Yes, you should have listened. But its still not your fault. Edward, she will forgive you, she already does, its just. She's afraid. She doesn't want to go through that pain again, and I know you don't either. But she's afraid. Just give her time, I see it. You two will be back to normal soon. She loves you." I decided I had heard enough and backed up and started walking loudly into the kitchen. I smiled as they both looked at me.

"Hey."

"Hey Bella, uh where's Jasper?"

"Out there with Emmet."

"Ok ill be, right back." and she strolled right out the kitchen, leaving me with Edward.

**A/N: hows it coming so far? tell me what you like, what you dont like. what you want to see happen.**

**i might have chapter 10 up today, most likely i will. so look foward to chapter 10. **


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10: The kiss**

**EDWARDS POV**

She stood there looking at me for a long while. Neither one of us knowing what to say. I wanted so badly to hold her, wrap my arms around her. She looked sad. I couldn't figure out why.

"Alice is right you know?" She broke the silence.

"Ah you heard. And i thought I was the with the super vampire hearing.." I didn't know if I was annoyed or relieved that she had heard.

"Unfortunately, you are." She said glumly. "But your not the only one who can eavesdrop." she frowned "I'm sorry."

"For what. There's nothing to be sorry for. She was right, I should have never left. It was, I was.."

"Not that, about it not being your fault. She's right, its not your fault. You did what you thought was best for me. Even though it turned out to be the worse idea you have ever had." She was still upset, but she was talking to me, alone, that was good. "It's still not your fault. I don't blame you." How could she say that? It was my fault, I told everyone we had to leave, If I hadn't of told them to. They never would have left. It was my fault everything, Victoria coming after her, the fact she had to be with werewolves. All of it was my fault. She must have sensed the fact I was still blaming myself. Her abrupt movement toward me startled me. She grabbed my hands and looked at me. Could get lost in those chocolate eyes forever. Her warm soft lips just inches away. I wanted to make them closer. Bring mine to hers. But I knew I shouldn't. I had to fight that urge. She snapped me out of the battle I was having with myself.

"Edward, I mean it, stop blaming yourself. Its not your fault, none of it is your fault. Victoria, the wolves. I was already friends with Jacob before he transformed. That's not your fault. You didn't know he was going to transform into a werewolf. Neither did it. But it doesn't change the fact he did. And its not your fault. And as for Victoria. She would have come for me, even if you had stayed."

"But we could have gotten her, she wouldn't be a problem right now. I.."

"Stop. Please Edward stop blaming yourself for things that are entirely out of your control." She was almost begging me to stop blaming myself. I saw the sadness in her eyes. She was fighting to keep back the tears that so wanted to escape. She failed.

Tears started brimming up in her eyes. Falling down her cheeks. She tried to look away. I hesitated to put my hand on her chin and wipe them away. She didn't want this, not yet. But I couldn't just let her stand here in front of me tears flowing freely, and do nothing. I gently placed my hand on her chin, and lifted her face to mine. She looked up at me into my eyes. I slowly reached for her cheek, to wipe the tears away, expecting her to fight it, tell me to get off her. Yell at me, scream at me. But she didn't. I wiped the tears away softly brushing her cheek with my thumb. She sobbed a little. I reached around her and rubbed the small of her back with my left hand. Trying to console her. I slowly placed my right hand on the back of her head, and slowly pulled her closer to me. Waiting for the instant she pulled away, she showed no sign of resisting. She didn't even tense up at cool of my touch. She slowly put her arms around me, she was as hesitant as I was. I wanted to laugh. But I held it at bay. She had her arms around my waist, slowly tightening her grip on me, to the point that if I were human I wouldn't been able to breath. We stood there in each others arms what felt like hours. I memorized this feeling, afraid It would be far to long before I ever felt her arms around me, or had her in mine. Memorizing the smell, the feeling, ever feature.

"Edward." she broke me out of my trance. My thoughts, no it wasn't long enough. I knew she didn't want this. I slowly pulled away.

"I'm sorry." I said as I let her go. She looked horrified, scared. Oh god what did I do. "I'm sorry." I repeated slowly. She started shaking her head.

"Wh.. What are. Y you doing." She stuttered. "Sorry for what?"

"I, you, you don't want this, you told me you needed time and that's not giving you th.." I couldn't finish my sentence the next second she had her arms wrapped around me tightly.

I sighed, and put my face in her hair. God she smelled incredible.

"I thought, I mean I thought you needed time?" I asked slowly not wanted her to pull away ever again.

"I do." It hit me like a hammer. How could I have been so stupid. Again she brought me out my own thoughts. "But I also need you." She said faintly as she nuzzled her face into my chest.

**BELLAS POV**

I was in his arms again, it felt like days passed before we finally walked out of the kitchen. everyone was staring at us as we walked into the living room. No doubt there super sensitive vampire ears heard, or Alice's all seeing eye, had told them what happen. It as getting late, and as much as I didn't want to leave, I knew I had to. Charlie would be pissed if I came home late. Especially knowing where I was. I agreed to let Edward drive me home. I was a little reluctant at first but then I saw hurt in his eyes and couldn't deny him anything. It felt to short, the drive from Edward to my house. Even for Edwards speed. It didn't seem long enough. He parked outside my house, I looked down our hands had been interlocked ever since we got into the car. I didn't want to let go. But I had a feeling Charlie was watching. I sighed as I looked toward the window. Edward chuckled.

"He's trying to see, but he cant see into through the car windows. He just knows its my car." He laughed again.

"Crap." I'm going to get a huge lecture when I get inside.

"He's not to mad at you, just worried, he's upset that your talking to me again, after." he didn't finish, I knew what he meant though. After he left. Charlie was pissed, he had really liked Edward, and for him to turn around and do that to me he didn't understand. Edward smiled at me.

"Thanks." I smiled back at him. "But I should probably get in there before he comes out." I said glumly. I looked down at our hands, and sighed, I didn't want to let go. But I had to. I pulled my hand from his and reached for the door handle. He placed his hand on my shoulder and turned me back to face him. He was so close. I could feel his breath on my face. I could smell, it. It made me dizzy. My face flushed red, and he placed his hand on my cheek. And smiled as it flushed even more.

"I've missed that, so much." He sighed. He smiled up at me, and leaned closer. I didn't know what to do, I didn't know if i was ready. I knew what was going to happen any second now. So I just froze. And then I felt his cold hard lips gently press against my forehead. I was surprised it wasn't what I expected.

"I will give you time Bella, as much time as you need." before I could even feel his hand release my face he was at my door holding it open for me. Charlie must have stopped trying to spy.

I reached the front door, and sighed. I really didn't want to go in. I heard Edward behind me, the passenger side window rolled down.

"It will be ok Bella. He'll go easy on you. And don't worry about anything else. Some one will be keeping an eye on you. I promise." I smiled back at him. As we both heard car tires squeal to a stop right behind the Volvo. I heard Edwards small low growl come from the car. As Jacob stepped out of his rabbit. Before I could even move Edward was out of his car crouching protectively in front of me.

"Get out of my way parasite!" Jacob growled. I heard my door open, we all looked and saw Charlie's wide eyed expression in the doorway.

"Bella, why don't you come in the house. And you boys both go home. I don't want any problems and i don't want a fight in front of my daughter." Charlie said, in a low mean voice. But he smiled up at Jake. Jake nodded.

"Dad, I'm fine, no one is going to fight anyone." I said as I looked back at Edward and Jacob.

" I wasn't going to fight anyone. I was just walking you to your door and wishing you a good night." Edward said with a sneer smile on his face.

"No fights here, Charlie." Jacob said as he grinned. I saw Edwards face drop. "I just came to talk to Bella, about earlier, and the kiss." He smiled up at me. I glared at him. How could he bring that up here. I looked at Edward, his face was still empty, he looked hurt, sad. I tried to smile at him, make him see me smile at him, but he wasn't looking he was looking at the ground. Pain on his face. And Jacob was grinning from ear to ear just staring at him. What was he doing to Edward. I wanted to strike out and punch him make him stop. But I didn't even know what he was doing.

"Stop it!" I yelled, I felt Charlie jump.

"Bella, calm down what are you yelling about? And what kiss Jacob?"

"Oh its nothing Charlie, Bella and I…"

"Shut up Jacob! You shut up right now Jacob Black, and go home!" I ran toward him fist flying. Edward grabbed me around my waist. And held me back.

"He's not worth breaking hurting your hand Bella. He's not worth it." Edward said in my ear as he kissed my cheek. Jacob winced, and glared.

"Bella! Bella, what is wrong with you?" Charlie yelled after me.

"Go inside dad!"

"I'm not going anywhere. Especially while he's, these two are out here." He said but he was only looking at Edward.

"Just go inside nothing is going to happen!"

"Bella. Then you come in with me."

"Ugh, I'll be right back!" I said as I stormed off.

"Where are you going? Bella!" Charlie called after me, but I wasn't paying any attention.

I grabbed Edwards arm and pulled him along with me. I walked up toward the woods. I knew Jacob was still watching. Probably still listening. But I didn't care, there was nothing I could do about that.

"Edward." I sighed.

"Bella don't, I don't need an explanation. I left you. Its normal for people to move on. I just…"

"Move on?" I cut him off, I couldn't believe him. "Are you kidding me? Come on, all day that's all we talked about, was how I didn't move on. And just because Jacob comes here and tells you that he kissed me, against my own will I might add. You all of a sudden think I moved on? What the he…" the next thing I knew his cold, gentle lips were on mine. His arms around my waist pulling me in closer. I could have sworn I heard A growl come from somewhere near the house. And then I was sure of it when I felt Edwards lips turn into a grin.

I couldn't hold it in anymore. I wrapped my arms around his neck. Pulling him closer, as close as I could get. Knotting my fingers in his hair. This wasn't something he allowed but at the moment I was glad he didn't care.

"That was all I needed to hear, to know he initiated it." he whispered in my ear as he pulled away. I smiled up at him. "So I don't think the dog is to happy with what he just saw."

I sighed. "I wish you both would just grow up with the name calling."

"I'm sorry, Jacob." He rolled his eyes.

"Thanks." I laughed.

"We should get you back, before Charlie sends out the national guard." He joked as he lead me back down to the house. I tried to ask him what Jacob was doing to him but he put his finger over my mouth and told me later.

Charlie and Jacob were on the front porch talking. Jacob no longer held a grin. He saw what happen with Edward. He saw us kiss. Her frowned as I Edward kissed my cheek and got into his car.

"Someone will be watching you, you'll be safe." He winked. "Bella, I love you." and before I could respond he was driving off around the corner.

I sighed and turned around to face Charlie and Jacob.

"What the hell was that Bella?" Charlie was angry. But he looked confused.

"What the hell was what Dad?" I asked, annoyed.

"Bella." He said sternly. "With Edward. What was that? What, are you two? I mean he left you Bella."

"It's none of your business dad, and no were not back together, officially. Yet!." I screamed as I stormed past them into the house. I was about to walk up the stairs when Jacob grabbed my arm.

"We need to talk Bella." He pulled me back out side. I waited for Charlie to object to yell tell me to get back in the house. But both me and Jacob knew he wouldn't, he liked Jake. More than Edward.

Twice that day I was at the edge of the woods near my house.

I sighed, not wanting to talk to Jacob. There was nothing to talk about. He kissed me, end of story. It meant nothing and never will. Edward was back, hopefully he wanted to talk about that. I had to talk to him for Carlisle anyway.

"Bella." His voice was low, uneasy.

"Hmm?"

"You know what we need to talk about." He grinned at me.

"What Jake? What do we need to talk about?"

"You know what. Although now there's more to talk about." He frowned as he looked back at the house. And then into the woods. Like he was searching for something, someone.

"What Jacob. I don't want to be out here all night. So can we please what ever this is over with?" I rolled my eyes and crossed my arms. I refused to meet his gaze. So I looked back at the house.

"Bella, we never got a chance to talk about earlier. And the, I mean, the kiss."

"What about it? Is that your way of trying to apologize?"

"What?" he snapped. "Apologize? For what?"

"Kissing me!" I turned around to face him.

"I would never apologize for that. And you kissed me back."

I fought back a laugh. "Are you serious? I didn't kiss you back! I stood there, I was in shock! I couldn't believe you kissed me!" I was shouting.

"Call it what you want, but I know what I felt. And I know you felt it to."

"Jacob." My anger slowly faded into sadness, I was going to break his heart. I loved him. Yes. But it would never be like I loved Edward. He would never be Edward. "it's not like that. I didn't, I didn't feel anything. It wasn't, I'm sorry."

"Stop denying it Bella. You felt something. I love you, and you love me. There's no reason to pretend."

"Jacob. I do love you. But not like that. I love Edward."

"He left before, he'll do it again. Bella don't be stupid. You kissed me back. You felt something!"

"You don't understand, you don't know the whole story! He wont leave again!" I was shouting again. "And Jacob I didn't feel anything. You saw when Edward kissed me. That, that was something! When I kissed you, here was nothing!" how dare he bring up last year. How dare he, he didn't know anything. He didn't know the whole story. I looked up and saw agony in his face. And I realized what I said, had hit him low. "I'm sorry Jake. I love you, I always will. But it wont ever be enough." I frowned as looked to the ground. For a long while all was silent except the sounds of the woods.

"Are, they. Is he back?"

"You saw him didn't you?"

"Well yea, but is he back, for good?" He was hesitant to hear my answer.

"Yes they all are!" I snapped, Edward wouldn't leave me again.

"Ok. This changes things, we have to stick to the treaty, and the boundary line. We cant protect you all the time now." he changed the subject. He had been defeated. I could stills see the sadness in his eyes. But at the same time I was annoyed.

"Uh I don't need protection! I am not a baby. I don't need a baby sitter!" I shouted why did everyone think I needed watching?

"I never said you did, its just safer. I don't want anything to happen to you. And with Victoria out there. The more people keeping an eye out for you the better."

"Speaking of that." It was a better time than any to ask him what Carlisle wanted. "Have you guys picked up anything or seen anything from her? Carlisle wanted me to ask you. Because they haven't sensed or smelled her on there side."

"No, not for a week or so. but it will be more difficult now. We cant pass the line again. If she goes over we have to let her now. We cant go onto there land anymore."

"Ok." and then it hit me. The stupid treaty. The stupid boundary line. Why would they need it. They can life it. Make it easier on themselves. "What if you talk to same and I'm sure Carlisle will agree to it. But what if we life the boundary line." I saw his face drop, he started to glare. "At least for now. Until I mean it would be easier not having to worry about going over into some one else's land. wouldn't it?"

"It would, but Sam would never go for it."

"Well Sam is an idiot!" I frowned why worry about 2 things, when you can eliminate one. It made no sense. It would be easy without having to worry all the time about where a stupid invisible line is.

"Bella, seriously there vampires, we cant trust them, any of them. There all blood thirsty parasites. Who feed off of humans!"

"And you're an easily angered werewolf who if gets to upset can lash out and anyone no matter who they are with out warning and permanently scare them if not kill them!" Jacob cringed at my words, they were harsh, but I was upset, why couldn't they just play nice. Why couldn't they just get along. It was simple neither one wanted to cause the other any harm but yet they call each other names like there five years old.

"I, Bella, I would never hurt you."

"I never said you would, but you could! And they are not ALL blood thirsty human drinkers! They drink animals Jacob, they don't want to cause any harm. Just like you guys don't. but what ever. Act like 5 year olds. What does it matter to me. While you guys are calling each other names. Victoria will find an opening and BAM. Good bye Bella." I was ranting now, I started walking back to the house. I was done talking.

"Bella, don't even joke about that, we wouldn't let her get to you. Ever!" He growled.

"I'm tired Jake, I'm going inside. I'll see you later." I said as I got to my porch.

"Bella, are you." He couldn't finish.

"Yes Jacob, I'm back with Edward. Sort of."

"What does, what exactly does that mean?"

"Were working on it. I love in Jacob that's all that matters. But I want to be able to trust him. I do trust him, but I, I'm scared." I decided honesty would be better than a lie.

"You can always trust me." He stated as he kissed my cheek and walked toward his car.

**A/N: please review. tell me what ya think. what ya like what ya dont like. what you want to see happen, what you think is going to happen ect. ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING. lemme kno!! please and thank ya.. hope your enjoying so far. **


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11: Stay**

Ugh. I sighed as plopped myself on the bed. This has been one of the longest days of my life. First I almost drown with Jacob, he kisses me. The Cullen's are back. Edward and Alice find out Jacob is a werewolf and so are about half a dozen other boys from La Push. I break Jacobs heart. Edwards trying to heal mine. Ugh one long day. And I had a feeling tomorrow wouldn't be much better. On top of it being a school day, I still had a lot of un answered questions, and I'm pretty sure I had a lot of answers to give. The only upside would be that Edward and Alice would be there. I wondered how the rest of the school would take to the fact that the Cullen's were back. And I was with Edward once again. I sighed. Tonight would be a long night, I finally get Edward back in my life. I didn't want to be with out him a minute longer. But he had went home.

It was like a light bulb snapped on in my head. '_Someone will be watching you_.' I just hoped it would be the some one I wanted.

I ran to my window tripping as I jumped of the bed. I wrenched the window open and stuck my head outside.

Wow all that talking and arguing I hadn't realized how late it was. I turned to look at my clock it was after ten. I looked back out side and squinted trying to search in the dark. For any sign of movement, a blur, a shadow. Anything to give a me a sign that someone is out there. I sighed as I turned around and slid to a sitting position on my floor under the window.

"Looking for someone in particular?" I jumped at the sound to hear Edward chuckle under his breath. I looked up. To that gorgeous god creature standing before me. With the crooked smile that made me weak.

"No, no one in particular." I grinned. He laughed

"So, how was your talk with Jacob."

"Like you didn't already hear." I assumed he was the reason Jacob was looking around before.

"Yes, but its still polite to ask." I looked at his face. What was he smiling about.

"What?" I asked. He was making me nervous.

"Nothing, I just like what Jacob was plotting to do, to make you, well, change your mind."

"What was he planning on doing?" I was curious now. And a little worried.

"I don't know if its my place to share. But you wouldn't of liked any of them." He stated with a grin on his face, he was amused. To bad I didn't find it so amusing. I found it rather annoying.

"Just tell me already!"

"Well there was more than one idea that ran through his head. kidnapping you for a day to show you how much he 'loved' you." he did the quotes in the air with his fingers and rolled his eyes. He looked jealous, and I was loving seeing this side of him, he was annoyed just like me, but for different reasons. "against your own will I might add.. Running us out of the state for good, that would have actually been quit funny to see, I don't know how he would have done it. But all it would have done was force me to take you away from him for good." he smiled at me. I knew that meant he would take me with him if Jacob even tried. I was comforted by that fact. "And then there was a confusing one, where he was going to set me up, and make it look like, well, I don't really know what. But he was trying to set me up as the bad guy." He rolled his eyes again.

"Was that so difficult?"

"No, but the mongrel seriously needs to be a little creative, he has no imagination. Sorry, Jacob." I smiled he remembered I didn't like it when they called each other names.

"Thank you." I whispered.

"Your welcome Bella, I would do anything for you." He leaned down and kissed my forehead. "I am going to respect your decision on needing time. Just please tell me when you no longer need it." He looked down and put his hand on my cheek, and slowly rubbed it with his fingers. There was a sense of longing in his eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I, I should get back out there." He started to walk toward the window. I didn't want him to leave, I wanted I'm to stay, or did I? No that would be bad. But, I wanted it so I didn't care.

"Edward." He turned to face me again. His eyes narrowed. "Please. Stay." I said the words separately making them each stand out. I needed him to stay, I lived so many nights alone, longing for him to be there next to me. And I wasn't about to pass up the chance to have him there.

"But, Bella, I'm doing what you asked I'm giving you time." He was confused, so was I to honest. I did need time, I think. Or was it I just wanted time. Time to be sure he was serious, be sure he wanted me forever, be sure that he would stay. Forever.

"Times up." I smiled up at him. It was the only thing I could think to say. I didn't know how to explain myself without hurting him. Time, I wanted time to be sure. But I didn't need time. I needed him.

Suddenly he was standing directly in front of me. He moved fast, to fast for a human anyway. He was so close I could touch him. I could smell his breath, I could feel it on my face. I flushed. I was beginning to get weak. And suddenly again to fast to notice any movement at all. His lips were on mine. I was in the air in his arms, he was carrying me to the bed. He placed me gently on my back.

He moved to fast for me to realize how, but he was suddenly laying next to me. Lips still on mine. They had never left, after all the moving they had never left mine. Cool, hard gently lips moving simultaneously with mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck. And slowly ran my fingers through his hair, As I gasped for air. Again his lips never left my body. Moved from lips to my cheek. And to my neck. I felt his cool breath on my throat. He kissed my neck and down to my collarbone. It sent chills up my spine, but it wasn't from the cold. I was having a hard time concentrating. I forgot to breath more than once. I was getting dizzy. He traced his lips down my chin, and found my lips again.

This was far, far more than he allowed. Than he had ever allowed. I didn't want to ruin it. And have him pull away abruptly. Just as fast as he had began. But I couldn't help myself. I let my hands drop from around his neck. And slowly traced his neck to the front of his shirt. I ran my fingers down the middle of his chest, to his waist. I slid my fingers up and around his waist to his back. I felt a small part of his bare back. I followed it up lifting his shirt even higher. He sighed.

"Bella." He groaned. And rolled over onto his back. I sighed, and. realized just how out of breath I really was. We laid there for a few moments, trying to catch our breath. And me trying to slow my heart down. It was doing car wheels.

**EDWARDS POV **

If I had a heart, it would have jumped out of my chest, I was breathing so deeply. I didn't even know why, I didn't need to breath. It was just the only thing I could think to do. That was amazing. But I had to stop. couldn't continue without loosing myself completely. And that would have been a bad idea. I could have hurt her.

"Sorry." She sighed. What could she possible be sorry for. That was incredible, it confused me. Did people normally apologize for things like that.

"For what?" I breathed deep.

"That, I know, I shouldn't have."

"Bella, don't, please, that was, terrific, better than that. I just." I pushed my self up to look at her.

"I know I know. Self control, and your lack there of." She was annoyed. Hell so was I. I wish I could just let go. Let go of everything, but then she would get hurt, and I would never be able to live with myself if something happen to her, especially by my own hands. "But if you have so little self control then how were you able to stand all of, that without wanting my blood." sh spat at me. It made me laugh.

"Self control isn't my problem anymore. I can handle, that urge. Its, well the other urge I have trouble controlling." god how I wanted to just give up fighting, give up and let temptation take me. But I couldn't do that. I couldn't risk it, risk everything.

"What? I don't understand, I mean I thought." She was confused. The expression on her face made me laugh again. She started to pout. Which just made it even cuter. I laughed. Which made her pout into a frown. I laughed again. She was getting annoyed.

"I'm. Sorry. It's just." I tried to explain but she was making it rather hard not to laugh. "Stop making faces or I wont be able to explain. Your making these cute expressions and when I laughed you'd just change to an even better one. I'm sorry it wasn't anything bad." I smiled at her and leaned forward to kiss her forehead.

"Ok, well I'm glad I can be good for a laugh. But I still don't understand. Why isn't my blood, my smell to much for you?"

"It's just, I lived so long with out you, all the while still needing you. Thinking about you, about your features, your smile, your eyes, your hair, and your smell. I think I thought about you so much I just got immune to it. Or it could be that I went through a long few hours believing, thinking that I would be to late to save you. And you'd be dead. It gave me a new way of looking at things. I know what my limits are. And your smell, is appealing. Way to appealing, but living without you is far more painful than ignoring my instinct to drain you dry." I hope she would understand that, I didn't know if I explained it right. I didn't really know how to explain it. It was like I lived so long without her. That the need to be with her, was much, much more appealing to me than her blood.

"Ok, but what did you mean, 'other urge'" she said as she lifted one eyebrow. God I loved her face expressions. All of them, they were all to much.

"Bella, I'm a vampire, but I still have manly urges." I smiled. Her eyes got slightly larger, she looked amused. Hopeful.

"Let go of your urges." she wrestled her way on top of me. And pressed her lips tightly against mine. I kissed her back. No, no I had to stop, I had to control myself.

But this, this was what I longed for now. I had Bella I no longer needed to long for her, I had her. It was what I always wanted, but no. I had to stop. She could get hurt. This was to dangerous. She must have felt my sudden battle I was having with myself. She pressed her body tightly against mine. That was enough, that was what my body needed, as all my effort to fight went out the open window. I wrapped my arms around her neck. And traced her shoulder blades, down her arms, to her waist. She ran her hands through the top of my hair. As I placed my arms on her sides. She gave me chills, me a vampire, chills. It baffled me. But none the less I had chills. I squeezed her sides. A little to hard? She moaned. I tensed up, and soon realized it was a good moan.

She ran her hand through my hair, all the way to my cheek. It felt amazing, to good. I think I was the one moaning now. How could something so forbidden be this good. And it wasn't even close to the actual moment. The moment when we became more than one. The moment that, I was eternally damned. My virtue was all I had. That sudden thought brought the panic back, brought the fight back. I was fighting the urge again I tried to pull away, but she just came even closer to me. She slid her hand across my cheek again, but didn't stop.

Her hand traced down the side of my neck. Down to the shirt collar and traced my shirt. She reached the front. I felt her fingers search, searching for the first button. She got it, and moved to the next.

My hands were still on her sides. I slowly traced my fingers up and down her back. Her shirt had come up a little, so I traced the bare skin near her pant line. I wasn't thinking anymore. I was just doing, and before I even realized it, my hand slid up her back under her shirt. And the next second my shirt was completely open. Open to my bare chest. She traced her fingers down my chest, around each crevice, each curve of my abs. Her fingers found it. I let out another moan. And grabbed her around her waist. And rolled her over, careful not to place my weight on top of her.

I didn't even realize when it had happen, but her shirt was now laying next to us on the bed. So many emotions ran through my head. Love, longing, lust, the urge to continue was over coming the urge to fight. I didn't want to stop. I never wanted it to end. But I knew eventually it would have to end. One way or another it would have to end. I didn't want to hurt her, but I knew if I continued I might loose control. I could slip, and break a bone, her arm, a rib, something, I shuddered at the thought, her neck. I could kill her.

I heard her let out another low moan, I couldn't control myself any longer. I needed her, and I needed her now.

**A/N: short chapter I know. I'm sorry!! But I had to end it here. I didn't want to end on a cliff hanger… but I myself havent decided what I want to happen here.. if I want them to go all out. Or if I want Edward to fight against his urges and win. And tell her they had to wait. Shes to fragile, he could kill her, ect. Blah blah.. **

**Any opinions please let me know what you think should happen. What you think they should do lol.. **


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12: Giving In**

I felt her fingers trace along my waist around to my back. She dragged her nails up my back to my shoulders. She was ripping my shirt off. When I realized just how far we were going, I gasped. And lifted my head away from her, she sighed. I laid my head on her shoulder. And whispered I was sorry in her ear.

"Edward, seriously! You couldn't hold of on being responsible for a little longer?"

"I'm sorry, Bella. Really, it has nothing to do with being responsible, and more to do with the fact that I could break you. Bella I could kill you." she laughed at me.

"Edward, your not going to kill me!" she sighed again.

"Bella. I could kill you and not mean to. I could kill you and not even notice right away. I loose focus, and stop concentrating on not killing you, not using my full strength and I could snap your neck. Please, don't be mad, I love you, I do, so much. And I want you so bad, god I want you Bella. Please. Please understand."

"I understand Edward I'm not mad at you. I'm annoyed. Irritated."

"I'm sorry Bella." I didn't know what else to say. I couldn't even look at her. I laid back and stared at the ceiling. Ugh what did I allow. Why didn't I stop.

Well that's easy. I didn't want to stop. I still don't want to stop. But what if I hurt her.

"You couldn't have let it go on a little longer? Edward. You lasted that long. See me, I'm fine. I'm better than fine. Please stop putting up these rules, boundaries. I'm not a werewolf. I don't need boundaries!"

"I know your not a werewolf. Thank god for that, but Bella, I could kill you with just one finger and it would be a total accident. I couldn't live with myself if something ever happen to you. Let alone by my own hands."

"Edward,. Nothing happen earlier. Look at us!" She threw her arms in the air as she sat up completely. Showing off her perfect figure. If she could have raised her voice without waking Charlie, she would have been yelling. "Edward. Please, give in to the urges. Just try." She was begging. She leaned back down on her arm and faced me. I looked into her eyes, they were pleading with me. I had to look away. That was a bad idea. Her shirt was no longer on the side of the bed, it must have fallen off. She was sweating, her chest was shimmering. She was wearing a light green bra, with pink lace. God she even looked appealing.

"Please." she begged again. I couldn't resist anymore. I put my hand around her neck and pulled her to me.

**BELLAS POV**

Edward was pulling me closer, I was right up against him.

"Bella" I heard him moan. And then he pulled away abruptly, eyes wide.

"Your dad!"

"What?" I was shocked why would he be worried about him.. Then I heard Charlie's door open. And Edward was gone. My shirt was laying on my lap. I threw it on as fast as I could and laid down. I didn't have time to grab a blanket, I heard my door open. I laid very still. Careful not to move, not to breath to deep which was hard, I was still catching my breath. I decided it would b better not to breath at all. I heard my door close. I waited, and then Charlie's closed behind him.

"Breath Bella." I let out a whoosh of air. I was disappointed to see Edward was fully dressed and buttoned. "You ok?" I nodded. "You should probably go to bed now." He smiled.

"What why?" I glared.

"Because I think we've both had enough excitement for one night."

"No, I don't think so." I grabbed his arm and pulled him onto the bed.

"Bella, please. That was entirely, that was, to far. We let that go to far. I'm sorry I didn't stop earlier"

"Edward! Please. Don't!" I was annoyed.

"I'm not saying never Bella, I promise you."

"Edward. Why. You didn't hurt me at all."

"I understand what your saying Bella, and I promise you. Soon. Just, not tonight."

"Why not tonight?" I snapped.

"Because for one, Charlie is still in his room debating on whether or not to come check on you again. He's worried my presence earlier today will send you back into the 'catatonic' state as he so vividly recalls it. Little does he know I'm sitting on your bed with your right now."

"UGH."

"Bella, not tonight."

"You promise? You promise soon? Because you cant keep doing this to me, giving me a taste and then snatching it away! I don't want a bit of the cake, I want the whole damn thing!" He laughed at my analogy.

"Bella, if Charlie wouldn't have woken up and came in here, I have no doubt in my mind you would have gotten your wish. I had no self control left. I had no urge to fight anymore. I gave up. I decided to give in."

"Ugh Charlie!"

"Yes, ugh Charlie." He laughed. "Now get some sleep."

"I cant sleep at a time like this. Not after, that."

"Try. Please. We have a long day tomorrow."

"What?"

"School. I can only imagine the talk, and thoughts I am going to hear when we both stroll into the school tomorrow with Alice."

"Oh, that." I forgot about school. I didn't really want to hear everyone's questions nor did I want to answer any of them. "Edward, can I ask you something?"

"Anything."

"What was Jacob doing to you earlier?"

"What do you mean?"

"Earlier, you looked like he was causing you pain?"

"Oh, that. It, was nothing."

"Edward." I eyed him suspiciously. He was hiding something. "Edward, tell me. No more lies. Just tell me."

"Bella, I'm being honest it was nothing. He just has a very good memory."

"What do you mean?" and then it hit me, Jacob was using his memory of how I was against Edward.

"I mean he showed me how serious things were, when I left you. I left you broken, and I am so terribly sorry. I will never ever leave you again. He thought about all the times you were with him and the subject came to me, or something that reminded you of me. And your face, your actions. And then he showed me Sam's memory of the day I left you. It pained me to watch and see all that. But he was shouting it at me, he was making it to difficult to ignore. And it killed me. I wanted to die right there, after seeing exactly what I had left you like. I am truly sorry you will never understand how sorry I am."

"Edward, don't be, its ok, I understand why." I wrapped my arms around him and pulled him to lay next to me. I placed my head on his chest. "He doesn't play fair. And he doesn't know everything. So please Edward stop apologizing. Its not your fault. I am sorry Jacob did that."

"Its ok, it gave me even more incentive to fight even harder, and I just might not play fair either. What dear little Jacob doesn't understand is, I already have you. And I am not letting go. Ever." he smiled down at me and kissed my forehead. "No sleep Bella, Sleep my love."

Ugh the morning was a nightmare, I didn't feel like getting up at all. I didn't know how much sleep I had gotten, I just knew it felt like I hadn't slept in days. Edward had left to go home and get his car and change. I was downstairs eating a bowl of cereal. When Charlie said goodbye. I rushed to finish eating and rinsed the bowl. And ran to the door.

I wasn't disappointed. Parked in the driveway was the shiny silver Volvo, and Edward leaning against the hood. I bounced down to hug him.

"Your surprisingly awake." he laughed.

"Maybe I'm more vampire than we thought." I smiled, he just frowned and held the door open for me. I was surprised to see Alice sitting in the backseat. "Alice!"

"Hello Bella, ready for school?"

"Ugh not really. So anything exciting going to happen?" I asked I had a feeling she already knew how the day was going to go.

"Oh yes, the Cullen's are back." she laughed. "Everyone is in an up roar about it. And you and Edward of course."

"Of course." I rolled my eyes.

We made it to school in record time. We got out of the Volvo and the number of people staring, watching us as we walked to school. Was alarming. It was like they had already heard they were back, and were waiting for them.

Angela was extremely happy, to see me happy. The first half of the day was like a blur. The whispers and all the eyes. All just melded into one big blur. No one wanted to ask why they came back. They all just assumed stupid different reasons.

Lunch was no better, we sat at my no over crowded table.

They day finally was over we drove Alice back to the house and dropped her off. Edward was going to come back to my house and we were going to do our homework. Charlie couldn't object to that.

The days went by faster now, the Edward was back. They school days all were a blur. The talk about the Cullen's return had died down in the first week or so. No one cared anymore. They accepted it, and accepted the fact of me and Edward. Class' went by fast. Edward had every single class that I did.

We would go to his house some days and be with his family. Some days I would make dinner or him and Charlie. Charlie didn't like the fact that we were together so much, and the fact that he was in his house eating his food. But I didn't care. I was happy. Nothing else mattered.

It was Saturday. It was a nice day out. Me and Edward had spent most of the afternoon in our meadow. We decided to head back to my house, after my stomach had growled.

"I'm going to have to keep reminding myself to not forget you eat more than me."

"I'm fine honest." my stomach betrayed me, at that moment it growled so loudly I think the entire town could hear it. Edward just peered at me and smiled. "Ok maybe a little hungry." I admitted.

We were almost to my house when Edward let out an annoyed sigh.

"What?"

"He is beginning to really bug me!"

"Who?" I asked as we turned around the corner to my house. There sitting behind my truck was the rabbit. Jake laying on the hood shirtless soaking up the sun. Quil and Embry were standing next to him. "What do they want?"

"To talk."

"Ugh I dotn want to talk! I'm done talking."

"Not with you. With me. Jacob wants me to relay a message to Carlisle."

"Oh."

We pulled up slowly. And Jake hopped off his car and walked toward us.

"We need to go inside, if that's ok. I cant really stand outside and have a conversation with them" he smiled as he held his hand up into the sunlight. It sparkled throwing colors every which way. I loved it.

"Ok, stay here ill get them inside first, and you can follow."

"NO, ill go with you."

"Edward don't be stupid, it would be easier for you to sneak in, without a big crowd around you. I'll be fine."

"I'll go first." he stated and then the next second he was gone. I stepped out of the car and walked toward Jacob.

"What do you want?"

"We need to talk to the bloodsucker." I glared at him for his use of words.

"If you cant be nice then you can just leave right now!"

"Whatever, Edward then." he rolled his eyes.

"Good, now inside." We walked inside and found Edward sitting on the couch. I walked over to him and he pulled me down to sit on his lap. Jacob let out a low growl. And I heard Edward hiss.

"What do you want D.. Jacob?" I smiled at Edward. He kissed my forehead. I looked up to see a hurt expression on Jacobs face but it was gone quickly.

"I wouldn't do it if I were you Jake. Not only would you not win. Bella would be furious." Edward smiled up at Jacob. As he answered Jacobs thoughts.

"What did you come here for Jacob?" I was annoyed. What did they want. Quil smiled slightly at me, and I smiled back.

"Victoria." I tensed and shuttered at the name, and Edward let out a long hiss.

"What do you mean? What's happen?" Edward asked concerned, look on his face. "Ah, we figured she would."

"Stop doing that, please let him talk. I cant read minds!" I blurted out annoyed. I wanted to be in on the conversation. It was because of me Victoria was back in the first place.

"Sorry love. He just said they came across her trail last night. She's back." he hugged me tightly. She was back, she was back for me.

"We'll get her Bells don't worry. It'll be easy." Jacob tried to calm me. I was scared. Not for me, but for all of them.

"It'll be fun!" Quil said excitement in his eyes.

"Fun? FUN? You call this fun? Risking your lives trying to keep her away from me? that's fun to you?" I was angry how could they think so lightly of this. How could they be so calm.

"It will be ok Bella. I wont let anything happen to you. I promise." Edward said as he kissed my cheek.

"We wont either." Jacob growled.

"That's the problem. What if someone gets hurt? What if you get hurt?"

They all laughed, even Edward. I Groaned and stood up. How could they be so calm at the fact of going to face Victoria and hunt her down.

"I'll tell Carlisle. We'll all be on close look out on our side." Edward said as he stood up to be next to me. "I have that covered, you don't need to worry about her." He snapped.

"What to you have planned then?" Jacob snarled and glared. What were they talking about? Were they talking about me?

"She will not be alone, ever."

"What happens when you need to, feed." Jacob said in disgust as he made face.

"I don't need to 'feed' as often as you would think. She will never be out of my sight. And when the occasion calls for it, and I do need to feed. She will be at my house with my family, or Alice will be here with her." Jacob glowered. And growled lightly. "No I don't think so, that wouldn't be safe for her. None of you can be trusted. And in a pack even worse."

"What? She'll be safe, She wont dare attack her around all of us."

"Maybe, but I don't trust you. There for my answer is no. we will protect her. You just keep us informed if you have anything, and we will do the same. Now Bella is very hungry and needs to eat. So if you'll excuse us." Edward was walking toward the door and held it open. A smile still on his face.

"Bella?" Jacob looked at me.

"It's ok Jake, he's right I'm hungry, but I don't have enough food to feed the three of you. You guys eat like pigs." I smiled at him. "Thank you for telling us."

"Sure Sure." he said as he walked toward the door after Quil and Embry. He paused in front of Edward and stared at him. Concentration on his face.

"Nice try dog, it has no effect on me anymore. You see, you may have a part of Bella, but I have her entirely. She's already mine. I don't need to fight with someone else to get her like you. I already have her. And I assure you, I am not letting her go."

"We'll see." Jacob spat. And tried one more time. Edward just chuckled.

"I don't have to dream about that, I've already seen it." Edward grinned his eyes never leaving Jacobs face.

Jacob let out one more fierce growl and walked out. Edward shutting the door behind him.

"What was that about?"

"He just showed me the same thing he did before. Only he didn't know we had talked about it. It had no effect on me." he smiled again and bent down and brought his lips to mine gently.

"Now lets get you something to eat." he walked toward the kitchen.

"Edward, what did you mean when you told him you didn't have to dream about it, you've already seen it?"

"Lets just say Jacob has very vivid imagination, and fantasies." My mouth dropped. "Bella, I love you, but I'm sorry, I told you I wasn't going to play fair."

"You didn't have to tell him that! What if, what if he tells Billy, and Billy tells Charlie?"

"Bella, he didn't believe me. Although I think it was more of the fact he didn't want to believe me."

"Ugh, now he probably thinks we did more than we actually did! Which you still haven't kept to your promise!"

"Bella, I never said when, I just said soon."

"Fine." I said grumpily as I opened the fridge.

Charlie came home later than usually, and he was in an even worse mood than usual after seeing Edward.

"What's wrong dad?"

"Bella, Edward. I don't want either of you hiking in the woods anymore. Until I tell you both its ok. You understand?"

"Um Dad, what is it? Why?"

"No problem Charlie. I'll keep her out of the woods." Edward promised.

"What's wrong Dad?"

"There's been a, an incident. Someone a hunter was killed. He set up his camp, and something, or someone attack him. There was animal tracks. Huge animal tracks. But there was foot prints leading away. The animals might have smelled it. Just promise to stay out of the woods until this is settled."

"Ok Dad." I could tell by Edwards face there was something else going on, something more than what my Dad was telling me.

When it was time for Edward to leave. Or at least take his car back home. I walked him out to his car.

"What's going on? What isn't Charlie telling me?"

"Bella, listen to him. It was bad, I think, I think it might have been Victoria."

"What?"

"I can't be sure until I go check out the scene."

"Edward, no. Stay here." I pleaded.

"Bella. You'll be safe. Alice is already in your room waiting for you. I'll be back later tonight. I promise." he kissed my forehead and walked to his car. I couldn't let him go out there alone. It was to dangerous. What if something happen to him.

"Edward!" I ran after him and jumped into his arms and kissed him.

"Well that was nice surprise. But ill be back in like 2 hours tops."

"Please, if you have to do this, don't go alone. Take Emmet and Jasper please!"

"Ok, I wasn't going to go alone. We were all going to go."

I sighed, they'd all be in danger, but at least the odds were against Victoria.

"Be safe. I love you."

"I love you!" He kissed me again, and then drove off. I walked into the house and up to my room. Sure enough Alice was sitting on my bed.

**A/N: no one answered any of the reveiws telling me what they wanted to happen. so i made sum up myself lol.. idk how i like it though. i might change it lol. im not sure.. tell me whatcha think... PLEASE R&R**


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13: Realization and Tears**

"It's been three weeks! Three weeks Alice. And they haven't seen her, sensed her or smelled her! Can we please stop with the babysitting? I don't need a babysitter. I will be fine."

"Bella, I am only doing this because I love you." Now the rest of the family is out hunting. Your staying the night with me at my house. It will be so much fun, I have new makeup and some new clothes for you to." She was chipper. Great torture, just the kind of fun I wanted. "I still cant believe Charlie agreed to let me stay."

"Oh yes. He called Esme, she told him she was staying there all tonight but was going to meet up with Carlisle tomorrow. But its just going to be me and you."

"Great." I rolled my eyes as we walked into the house.

"You can go put your stuff in Edwards room. Meet me down here when your done."

"Ok." I stalked upstairs toward Edwards room. The sofa in his room was long enough. It wouldn't be a comfy bed but it would have to do. The floor probably wouldn't be half bad either. Edwards room was at the farthest end of the third floor hallway, hard to mistake even when the huge house had been less familiar. But when I switched the light on, I paused in confusion.

There was a stunning colossal sized bed that now dominated the center of the room. The coverlet was dull gold, just lighter than the walls, the frame was black, made of intricately patterned wrought iron. Sculpted metal roses wound in vines up the tall posts and formed a bowery lattice over head.

"What the hell?" I said allowed. Even though I knew I was alone.

A bed, there was a bed in a vampires room. Even though said vampire never slept. couldn't sleep, and yet here in front of me is this beautiful bed. I hurried and put my stuff down and ran down the stairs.

"What is with the bed?"

"Oh Bella, be reasonable. You didn't really think he was going to make you sleep on the sofa did you?"

"Well, I suppose not."

"Are you hungry? There's some food in the kitchen."

"Ok." I ate slowly. The slower i ate, the longer it kept me away from Alice and her makeover. I couldn't stall forever though. Eventually we were in the bathroom, and she was putting god knows what on my face.

"Oh Bella, you look so pretty."

"I don't feel pretty."

"But you are. Look." I looked in the mirror, I actually didn't look that bad. I would never admit it to Alice. But It wasn't as bad as I had thought it was going to be.

"Thanks Alice." she smiled at me as she put away all the makeup.

We were downstairs watching a movie. I don't really remember which one. I wasn't paying attention.

"Hey Alice. Can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"Do you still see me, I mean." I frowned. I didn't know how to say it.

"Do I see you becoming one of us?" she asked for me. I loved how Alice knew what I was thinking before I even could say it.

"Well yeah." I sighed

"Bella, the short answer yes. The long answer. Edward doesn't want you to have to go through that. He doesn't want to take your life away from you. I know he is your life. But he doesn't want to take anything away from you. You being human and having a human life, and human experiences, he wants that for you. He wants you to be able to have everything you want. Even if you don't think you know you want It right now. You might some day. And he doesn't want you to ever regret anything."

"But I wouldn't regret it, I want this, I want to be with him forever. I want to be a part of this family."

"You are a part of this family. Vampire or not, you're a part of us now."

"How did you know Jasper was, the one for you. Did you ever think twice about it?"

"No I knew he was the one I was supposed to be with. First time I saw him, I had the vision I knew. And when I first met him, it just made me believe it even more. I still remember exactly what he looked like, what he smelled like, what he was wearing."

"Whoa. that's, you guys love each other. You guys are going to be together forever. I want that with Edward. Why cant he see that?"

"Bella, it was different, me and Jasper, we were both already vampires. We didn't have to choose to turn into one to be together. And neither do you. Edward doesn't want you to choose. He's not forcing you to."

"I wish he was." I stated. I wanted to be with him forever. Why couldn't he just realize I wanted this, no strings attached. I wasn't going to change my mind.

"I think in a way he does, he wants you to be changed. but he also doesn't want you to have to be changed just to be with him. He wants so much more for you. He thinks were cursed, soulless."

"I know, but any vampire who chooses the road you guys take, isn't evil. There not doomed to hell. They cant be. I believe that."

"Yes, but Edward has a hard time believing."

"Alice. You see me becoming one of you, right?" she nodded.

"Change me!"

"What? Bella its not that easy."

"Why not?"

"Because I could kill you. I wouldn't be able to stop. Changing some one is really hard. Most vampires cant do it without killing the person there trying to change. I only know Carlisle can do it. I don think I can. I'm sorry."

"Don't be, wishful thinking again."

"Don't force it. He'll come around."

"I hope your right. So you knew Jasper was the one, just from a vision? And you remember everything about him." it wasn't a question. She laughed.

"Yes, don't you know that about Edward?"

"Yes, of course. I just wish, I want to be changed. its not being forced on me, I'm choosing this because I want to. Not because I have to."

"I know."

"I'm going to go up to bed. I'm tired." I got up and walked up the stairs. I plopped onto the bed. I wasn't tired. Even if I was I doubt id be able to sleep. Thoughts were swimming in my head.

It was a few hours later, and I was still awake. I heard my door open. Alice must have come to check on me. But then I felt arms around me. I jumped.

"Sorry did I startle you? I thought you were sleeping." Edwards soft velvet voice echoed in my ears. I sat up and looked at him.

"What are you doing back? I thought you guys were supposed to go hunting?"

"We did. Well they did, I did to, I just didn't go as far. I decided I didn't want to waste this time. You here at my house." his lips gently placed on mine.

"Edward." I pulled away.

"What's wrong?"

"I nothing, I was just talking with Alice."

"I know she was thinking about that when I came in." he frowned.

"Edward."

"Bella, no."

"But."

"No I will not damn you to an eternity in hell. You mean to much to me to put you through that." he said calmly. I was mad.

"I'll be immortal, I wont die! I wont go to hell. Ill be able to live my entire existence with you!"

"Immortal or not, you can still be killed!"

"So could you!" I was yelling now. I jumped off the bed and was passing back and forth. Edward was next to me trying to calm me down.

"Bella please. I will not force this on you."

"Your not forcing this on me!" I shouted. "I want this. I want this more than anything except you." Tears were flowing down my cheeks.

"Bella, you already have me. Don't make this even more difficult. I will not let that happen to you. I will not change you."

"Your not the only vampire I know Edward!" I looked to the door.

"Alice would never!" His voice was a little higher, I had struck a nerve.

**EDWARDS POV**

Alice wouldn't dare. She knew what I would do to her if she even thought it.

"Edward! Again she's not the only one!" she was shouting at me, crying. I didn't know what to do.

"Bella, please calm down. I'm sorry. But this isn't all fun and games. Being a vampire, its not something I would have chosen for myself."

"Well I'm choosing it. No ones forcing me." She was pleading with me. "Please." her voice was now barely a whisper.

"Bella, I, I cant."

"You can. You just wont!" she was sobbing. I placed my arms on her shoulders and pulled her to me.

"Your right I wont. Bella, if I could return to your world. Be human again. I would do it for you in a heart beat. But I will not let you choose to be a monster. I just wont."

"Your not a monster."

"I used to be, when you're a newborn Bella. that's all you do is thirst for blood. It takes a few years to get control over that. And even then, sometimes there are mistakes. We slip up."

"You'll keep me safe, you'll keep me from slipping up. Edward please. I want this. Almost as much as I want you. I want to be with you forever."

"You have me."

"Not for forever. I'm going to die." she pulled away from me.

"Bella."

"Edward I'm sorry. You've been saying ever since I met you, that things cant work between us. That we live in different worlds. And I didn't wanna hear you, but maybe your right. You cant come back to my world. And you obviously don't want me in yours." she was crying, sobbing.

"I want you in my world. You are my world." what was she saying?

"You don't want to change me. I realize that now."

"Bella, I…"

"But what happens when I get old? Maybe then you'd want it. Maybe then you'd want to change me. You'd want me in your world. But I cant wait that long to find out. I cant keep doing this. I cant keep hoping for something your against. And I cant get any deeper and more in love with you than I already am. Its not fair, to you, or to me. To fall even more. When eventually were going to have to give it up. I cant go through that pain again. And it will be even more pain because it will be down the road. It will be to much pain to deal with."

"Bella, what are you saying?" My voice was shaky.

"I don't think I can't do this anymore. I'm sorry." she turned and walked out my door. I heard her crying sobbing as she closed the door.

She walked away, she walked away from me. I don't want to change her, I cant put this life on her for forever. But I cant loose her for forever either.

I've spent the past 80 odd years trying to close the door on forever, trying to close the door on being a monster. But hurting Bella like I was, that was exactly that, I was a monster. Trying to hide from it, from forever. I can't anymore. I cant close the door on forever. I can't close the door on Bella. I reached my door and wrenched it open and ran out to find Bella's back to me. She was leaning against the wall. Crying into hysterically into her arms.

"You want to know what I realized? That you were right. You were right all along. This isn't about being a vampire or a human. This is about us. How we feel about one another. Right here, right now. You don't need to be a vampire for me. But if that's what you want, then I guess we can work something out. But Bella I wont you to think about it take some time and think about what your planning to do. This doesn't have to be about vampires and humans. This is just about me and you. And how we feel about each other. Nothing else matters" my voice cracked at the end. It was raspy. I wanted to cry. How could she just walk away. I couldn't allow her to walk away.

"The day we first met. What was I wearing?" she asked still facing the wall"Blue jeans, white striped shirt, water jacket." I didn't understand the reason for her question, but I answered anyway."What about my shoes?""Boots." She was wearing water proof boots, its raining in forks everybody knows that. Why all the silly questions."How can you remember that?" she turned and faced me, I saw her face was wet with tears. And they were still flowing freely. "Because I love you. I think deep down between the spouts of me wanting to kill you, lure you away from the school and drain you dry. I loved you. First time I saw you, you were different from everybody else. I love you Bella Marie Swan. Only you forever and eternity." She flung herself at me, wrapped her arms around my neck. And kissed me patiently. She pulled away slowly. Still staring at me. I didn't know what to say. I couldn't let her leave.

"Edward." she said softly. Here it comes.

"Bella, no, please, don't. don't do this, don't leave."

"Edward, stop." she looked closely at me. She let out a gasp. It scared me I stood straight up. What was wrong."

"What?"

"Oh my god. Edward. ALICE!" She screamed it startled me and I fell back a little bit.

"What the hell is going on?" I was getting annoyed now.

"Edward. Your, you have tears in your eyes."

"What?" I said startled. That couldn't be. It was impossible. Alice came racing up the stairs.

"What's wrong, what happen, I heard yelling you guys fighting but I figured id give you privacy. What happen?" and then she looked directly at me, and her mouth dropped. What the hell was going on.

"Edward, how, why, your crying. Tears, real tears."

"What?" I ran into my room and looked into the mirror. My eyes were still topaz, but they were also red. Like Bella's were. And there were tears coming down my cheek. I stood there in amazement. This was impossible. I reached up and touched my face. I felt the wetness. I turned around and heard Alice on the phone. Telling Carlisle. I looked over at Bella, she was staring at me. She had a look of shock and amazement on her face.

"Bella, please." I begged. "Don't walk away. Don't walk away from this, from us." I suddenly felt more moisture on my face. So this was what it felt like to cry. I don't know if I liked it. It was making my vision blurry. I blinked to try to clear it.

"Edward, I cant walk away from you, I didn't even make it out of your hallway. But I cant just sit here and grow old, and die. Knowing all the while you're here seventeen forever. Please understand that." she was crying to. We probably looked like a pair of blubbering idiots.

"Bella, I understand that I do, but you have to understand that none of us had a choice. You do. And I don't want you to regret your choice, I don't want ten years from now you to regret your decision, regret your choice to be with me forever, for eternity."

"Edward, that will never happen. I know I am choosing the right thing. I know this is what is meant to be. I know I meant to be with you forever. And since you cant come back to my world there's only one other option, and I'm ok with that. I want that. I want this." she came closer to me and put her hands around my face. She brushed my wet cheeks with her thumbs. She was the one wiping away my tears.

"Bella I love you, so much. If your sure of this, your sure you want this. Then, I don't want to fight with you anymore. We'll figure something out. We can talk to Carlisle when he gets home."

"He's on his way home now. They all are." Alice said, as she came over to us. Still eyeing my face. "This is weird. Unnatural, this shouldn't be possible." she reached her finger and wiped away one of the tears. "How's it feel?" she asked, a puzzled look on her face.

"Weird, I didn't remember how it felt. It even feels weird. Wetness on my face, and it makes it hard to see." I said as I wiped my face on my sleeve.

"You get used to it." Bella frowned. And sat down on the bed.

'Do you two want time to talk? I'll leave.' Alice had asked me in her thoughts. She looked at me, and I nodded. Me and Bella needed to talk. I'm giving up. One way or another Bella will get what she wants. But I want her to be sure. Alice walked out of the door closing it behind her.

"Bella." I said softly as I walked over to the bed and sat next to her. "I'm sorry. I didn't want to hurt you. I never want you to be in pain. But I realize now, me telling you no. is putting you in pain. Your right. You were right all along. You will get old. You will die eventually, and I never will. But I want you to realize also. This isn't about me being vampire or you being a human. This is about us. How we feel about one another. Right here, right now. How much we care about each other. That's all that matters."

"I know, but Edward this is what I want. I love you, and I know this has nothing to do with vampires and humans and everything to do with us. But Edward. Imagine how we could be if I we were both vampires? I would never die, I would never get old. You wouldn't always have to worry about hurting me. Victoria wouldn't want me anymore. And there would be no danger for me." she was crying again. I grabbed her and pulled her onto my lap.

"Bella, I'll agree to it, I'll change you. But you have to give me time. I don't know if I can do it."

"I trust you. I know you can."

"Bella I love you so much. Do me something in return." just one thing I just needed her to agree to one thing..

**A/N: AH whats gonna happen? wat ya think? lemme kno... **

**PLEASE R&R!! **


	14. Chapter 14

_**A/N: Thank you to **__**twilightaddict26**__** for being the first one to guess this chapter correctly! Lol.. Its not that hard if u read the regular books lol :- )**_

_**ALSO YOU ALL SERIOUSLY NEED TO READ TWILIGHTADDICT26 STORY… **_

_**Not So Sweet Reunion**_

_**ITS AWESOME!!**_

_**Chapter 14: The Proposal and Love**_

_**BELLAS POV**_

_He slowly lifted me off his lap and placed me on the side of the bed. And then he stood up and looked at me. _

"_Bella." he started to lower himself to the floor. And lean on one knee. Oh my god. No, he wouldn't, he couldn't. _

"_Bella Marie Swan. I love you, today, forever, for eternity. Marry me?" I was shocked. I didn't know what to do. I wasn't ready. Was I? no, how could he ask me that. We aren't even out of school. I mean, did he honestly want this? What would Charlie say? Or Renee?_

"_Bella?" He asked softly._

"_I, Uh, You. Are you serious?" I blurted out and tried to suppress a laugh._

"_Great I just propose and you laugh. Yes I'm serious!" He smiled up at me. _

"_Edward. I, we aren't old enough. I mean were still in school." _

"_Bella if you have it your way. Were always going to be in school." he was right, we'd graduate, over and over again. Repeat it all for eternity._

"_You don't have to answer yet, its ok. I understand." I looked down into his eyes, I could see the hurt in them. Tears still slowly falling down his face. How could I say no to him. No to that face. Tear strung face, he was crying. I wanted him forever. I wanted to marry him, I just always thought it would be later down the road. After school But then again. We would never be out of school. Out of forks school yes. But still, vampires don't age. All that mattered was that, I loved him. _

"_Edward, yes." his eyes got wider. _

"_Are you sure. Seriously?" he jumped up and laughed lightly_

"_Great I just accept, and you laugh at me. Yes seriously!" I smiled at him. He grabbed me around my waist and picked me up. He swung me around in the air. All the while his cool hard gently lips were on mine. Moving passionately. _

"_Bella, I love you." he whispered in my ear, as he placed me gently on the bed. _

_He laid next to me. Half over my body, and half on the bed. Careful not to put any pressure what so ever on me. He began to kiss my cheek, my neck and back to my lips. His cool lips moved slowly all around. I let my hands roam over his bare, fantastic, muscled chest. By the slightest of my touch he let low growls escape his mouth. I looked into his eyes and what I saw reflected my own desires. They were pitch black and it seemed as if his irises were getting bigger and bigger. He was kissing my throat, nibbling gently. His arm tightened on my back and he groaned and bit me harder. Careful not to break the skin._

_It was all I could do to not shiver with excitement. But I knew if I moved even an inch. It could make him pull away abruptly and we would never continue. _

_He slowly lifted the end of my shirt up.. As he traced patterns on my stomach. Every so often my body would tighten and I'd let out a low moan. He changed course after a few seconds. And slid his hands slowly up my sides, and around my back to my shoulder blades. I was suddenly hoisted into a sitting position as he wrapped his one hand around both my wrist and lifted my arms up over my head. With his other hand he quickly pulled my shirt up over my head. He threw it behind him. His lips trailed down my neck, to my collar bone. As he slowly laid me gently back down. He nibbled a little more, and continued tracing his lips down. His lips paused between my chest. He slowly nipped the fabric at the bottom of my bra line. He began to slide his hands up and down my sides, moving a little closer each time to my breast. He slowly started his way down to my stomach. He kissed the outside of my belly button as his hands gently grasped my breast._

_I let out a moan. I couldn't take anymore. I grabbed him by the top of his shoulders and pushed him up. I sat up a little bit, fiddling trying to unbutton the top button of his shirt. It was impossible I couldn't concentrate. He pushed my hands away, and began to unbutton the top button. He was taking to long I flung his hands out of the way. I gripped the collar of his shirt and ripped open his button down shirt. Buttons flew around the room in all directions. He gasped at my sudden quick movement, and then smiled. _

_**EDWARDS POV**_

_I gasped at her sudden movement but then smiled when I saw her begin to eye my chest and abs. Her hands trailed from my shoulder, tracing my muscles. They flowed down to my V-line, and she moaned. She quickly popped my jean button and unzipped them. Following her hands as they went into my jeans and boxers _

_I moaned and in protest as she pulled her hands free and traced around my sides and up my back. She let out a low giggle at my protest and made her way down my shoulders. She traced the out lines of my chest and circled my belly button before making her way further down. I moaned again. _

_Before either one of us could realize. Both our pants were thrown to the floor. We were both in our underwear. I was now only in my green striped boxers. I should have worn my silk ones, but I had no idea this was going to happen. Bella on the other hand, had a yellow semi see through lace bra on, with matching semi see through thong. _

_She was amazingly beautiful. _

_**BELLAS POV**_

_We were both now barley clothed. He was wearing sexy green boxers. He looked more like a Greek god now than he ever had before. I was eyeing him as he traced his fingers around my sides, my stomach, he slowly began to trace the outline of my bra. Slowly he lowered his face and kissed my neck. His hands moved around to my back as he grabbed the bra and un snapped it. It to was thrown to the floor. He slid his fingers down around my breast. He continued down my sides. To my panty line. I lifted my hips off the bed a little, he looped his fingers inside my panty line and slowly slid them down. Kissing my stomach. The further he pulled my panties down the lower his lips got on my stomach, until they were on my hips. He made his way back up and around my neck to my lips. He pulled away slowly and looked down at me._

"_My god, Bella," He was studying my body carefully scanning over every detail._

_I mentally cringed. What if I wasn't good enough for him? My body was far from perfect. He wasn't impressed…My sudden burst of confidence disappeared. I cringed and made an effort to cover my body._

"_Stop." His voice scared me. It was unbelievably harsh. I flinched again. I kept messing up._

"_I'm sorry." I said as I glanced down._

"_Bella," He locked my hands in his, refraining me from moving. Then he kept studying my body. That's when I noticed for the first time what his expression looked like._

_His eyes were glowing, staring at every part of me. Memorizing it, taking it all in. They were drinking me in like some forbidden fruit. His mouth was slightly open. I could feel his breath on my warm skin. He was breathing deep. I shivered with pleasure._

"_God Bella," Edward began running his fingers on my body, "You're so beautiful…Never hide from me again."_

_I would have answered, but I couldn't find my voice right now. It was lost with the rest of my body. All I could see, All I could think, All I could feel was Edward's cold fingers trace down my thigh. My core began to throb uncontrollably. I began to breathe faster. I was giving Edward my all. All I could do was pray he'd like it…_

_Slowly my confidence returned and I dragged my fingers slowly down his back. He let out a low moan. He lifted his head slightly leaving his neck free, I kissed it, and decided I'd do the same thing he had done. I bit his neck softly, and then began to suck slowly, gently on his neck. He let out a low sound, I couldn't recognize, I decided to try again only I sucked a little harder. Again the unfamiliar noise came, it wasn't a moan. It was, I _

_laughed at my sudden realization._

"_Edward, you purred" I whispered into his ear. _

"_I purred" he said as he relaxed and pulled his face up to look into my eyes. _

"_Yes, you purred" I realized I liked the sound of him purring, I liked any sound he made. I knew I was doing things right._

"_Well then, I've never done that before"_

"_Well, let's see if you can do it again. I liked it, it sounded really sexy"._

"_You found my purring sexy?"_

"_Yes I find everything you do sexy"_

_He just smiled my favorite smile and brought his face back down and placed his lips gently on mine. I felt his cool tongue rub against my bottom lip. I parted them slowly, his cool breath entered my mouth. I moaned again out of pleasure, as he slid his fingers down across my breast. Slowly our tongues were entwined. Moving simultaneously with one another. His icy tongue explored my mouth while my hands knotted themselves in his hair, pulling him closer to me. I slid my arms down around his waist and pulled off his boxers. We had both rolled to our sides. Tracing our hands, our fingers over one another's bodies. _

_**EDWARDS POV**_

_I slowly pushed my self up on my one arm. Still on my side. She brought herself up so she could kiss my lips and then I rolled us over so I could hover over her. Suddenly a fear leapt into my brain. What if I hurt her? I crushed her? What if I killed her. My face must have given away my thoughts. Bella growled at me._

"_Don't even think about going back, Edward Cullen."_

"_Bella, if I hurt you at all please tell me." I kissed her lips gently again._

"_It's going to hurt. First time for both of us, I'm expecting the pain, I welcome it! Please don't back out now. I might just kill myself. So you don't have to worry about doing it! I can't wait anymore."_

_I smiled at her confidence in me. "Neither can I, my love. Neither can I."_

_With those last words, I plunged myself inside her. I could feel her gasp and grab my upper arms and dug her nails in. she released a little and I glided forward again, her nails dug in again, tighter. I wanted this more than anything. I struggled to keep control of myself. I was in all the way, I looked at her for any kind of hesitation. I saw none._

_I plunged inside of her again._

_**BELLAS POV**_

_I knew it would be painful. That much was expected. What I didn't expect was the overall bliss that followed. It was amazing. I felt like I could do anything. I felt like I was flying. Edward was on top of me. He was inside of me. I could feel the buildup gathering. Even after all of that I still needed more. I needed more of him _

"_Bella…" Edward said in a husky low voice, as I traced down his back, all the way to the bottom of his butt. I dragged my finger nails back up to his shoulder blades. _

_He paused for a second and pulled out as he began to kiss along my jaw line from ear to ear, then worked his way down my neck, shoulders, arms, all the way to my wrists and back up. He would lightly brush his lips against mine, but then keep kissing my body. It was driving me absolutely mad. My breathing started to get heavy. I tangled my hands in his hair as he sucked on my neck lightly. He then traced his lips light across my neck, down to my chest, he breathed lightly on my breast and it sent shivers down my spine. I tightened one hand in his hair, and had the other on his cheek. He slowly and gently kissed his way back up to my neck and my lips. _

_Eventually his kisses got more passionate, and my self control diminished. I pulled him to me as wrapped a leg around him, pushing him further on to me. I felt his resolve give slightly, as he pushed himself into me once again.. I felt an increasing pressure on my hips. He started kissing my neck a little more aggressively this time, and before I could say anything I felt a sharper pain go through my hips as he pushed himself on me. I knew he did not realize he was pushing so hard, and I knew this is what he was so worried about. I had promised I would tell him if he hurt me, but that the same time, I was afraid he would stop and not let us keep trying at all after this._

_I dragged my fingers down his arms. His body tensed, he slowly came to a stop again. I didn't have to tell him. I was thankful for his sudden stop._

_He began kissing my neck my shoulders, my chest. Kissing around by breast. As his lips slowly traced over my nipples I let out a low moan. _

_I started to kiss him more furiously, and I laced my fingers through his hair again. He moved his face towards me, and began kissing me as furiously as I had been doing._

_I felt my back arch as I pressed my body into him and I wrapped my leg around him again, pushing him into me. His lips met mine and I slowly parted my lips. Allowing him entrance. _

_My lips closed slightly on his tongue. I dug my nails further into his arms. I thought he would stop, but he pushed his tongue further into my mouth, and I felt his hips start to move again slowly, gently. it began too feel amazing. _

_I could see the bliss in his eyes as he started to move himself a little faster. He began to suck on my neck and continually kissed me all over my neck, shoulders, and chest. He felt absolutely amazing inside of me, and it took every ounce of my willpower to keep myself from testing his further. We continued to stare into each other's eyes, seeing nothing but pure love and passion. I loved him more than anything in this world. I just hoped I was enough for him, for forever._

_I heard his breathing get heavier and heavier, and felt a continually building sensation in my groin. Eventually, I couldn't keep my eyes open and longer, as the pleasure was taking over me. I moaned loudly. As soon as my eyes closed, I felt Edward lay his head next to mine. He continued to thrust, and we started to breathe the same ragged breaths, at the same time. I could hear him grunting and moaning every now and then, and forced my eyes open so I could stare into his gorgeous ones. He wrapped his arms around my, supporting my head on his hands, while supporting himself on his elbows. He pulled me close, and my entire body began contracting, my pulse was racing faster than a hummingbird, my toes involuntarily curled, and I dug my hands into his back. I was sure he would be bleeding if he were human. My nails hurt from all the scratching and digging I had been doing. _

_A loud moan escaped me as I pulled Edward more into me. I felt a stronger pressure from his body on my hips, but it was what I wanted. My back arched, I heard an even louder groan from him. He gave one final, strong thrust and as one, we peaked._

_I couldn't concentrate, I couldn't even see straight. I was in pure bliss. I felt Edward panting, as we rode this out together. Eventually I felt our bodies relax. I was dizzy. _

_Edward slowly laid his body gently on mine. Feeling the bare skin of his chest and abs on mine, I let out a little moan. Edward rolled over off of me and landed beside me on the bed as I laid my head on his chest, tucked under his chin. He kept tracing his fingers up and down my back, my side, down to my legs. _

_I sighed._

"_So, how, how was it?" he asked hesitantly._

_My eyes narrowed slightly, like he couldn't tell from my reaction, but I couldn't keep the smile off my face. _

"_Edward, you are perfect at everything. Why would this be any different?" _

"_You were just as amazing, my love." He told me, kissing me again._

_I intertwined my legs with his and traced my finger along his arm,_

"_I told you, you wouldn't hurt me," I said playfully._

_He looked at me skeptically, but smiled and kissed my forehead." Yes, well, I had to continually keep focus on not hurting you. Especially when I would bit your neck, I had to concentrate on not breaking the skin. I'll admit that as amazing as it was, it certainly took away from some of it for me, and for you too. I will never forget this night though, and it will always be special and amazing in it's own way."_

_This was definitely worth the wait, and I knew it was even more special since it was on our wedding night._

"_Well, once you change me, we wont have to worry about that anymore. Somehow, I think it will be a million times more amazing then. And that would have been a hell of a way to be changed." I stated as I smiled up at me, he frowned. "Besides, until then, we will get better at this. Your were amazing, this was more, better than I expected" I trailed off. Letting both our minds wonder. _

_I guess it worked, because he stopped breathing and got an enormous grin on his face as "More than you expected?"_

"_Well, yes, honestly, I never thought you would allow this." I said sheepishly._

"_Neither did I, but it got to a point, that I couldn't contain myself anymore. I couldn't control my urges. I needed you, I needed to feel you. I still do." he said as he grinned down at me. Looks like we both wanted more. But I knew he would insist on me sleeping. _

"_Lets just lay like this."_

"_Like this, what, all night?"_

"_Yes, all night. And when I fall asleep I don't want to feel you move! I want to wake up to this sight." I said as I leaned up and looked him up and down and smiled. _

"_Ok Bella, as you wish. But may I move to get you under the blankets at least?" he asked as he pouted. Poking his bottom lip out further._

"_Yes, I suppose, if you must."_

_We were under the blankets in a matter of seconds. I was still leaning on his chest. In his arms. He continued to draw patterns on my bare skin, all over. I breathed in deep taking in his scent. He smelled magnificent. I tried to fight off sleep for as long as I could. Taking in as much of this moment as I could. Not wanting to sleep. But I soon lost the battle. The last thing I remember before my eyes closed for the last time that night. Were the words 'I love you, soon to be, Mrs. Bella Marie Cullen' whispered in my ear. _

_**A/N: please PLEASE tell me what ya think!! I didn't want to make this scene super kinky I wanted it to be romantic. I mean it's the first time for them… not to mention the first time for either of them period lol….. So we'll hold off on the full on sex scenes lol.. I do have a question for all you readers.. Do you think if/when they do make love again. That should go into more detail and just more period lol.. **_

_**Also if you have a story you want me to read let me know. **_

_**PLEASE R&R!!**_


	15. Chapter 15

_**A/N: **_

_**DFsams321356 thanks for the review. **_

_**People always ask me to update.. So I'm going to clarify it here and in messages when I get them. I try to update atleast one chapter a day. If not more. I hate waiting for updates so I know everyone else does to. There for I try to update as much as I can.**_

_**ALSO**_

_**twilightaddict26,**_

_**Updated.. **__**Not So Sweet Reunion**_

_**Chapter 4 is up.. Go read it!!**_

_**Chapter 15: Message**_

_I woke up still curled in Edward's arms. I imagined that lying with me naked drove him crazy, again, but decided that we could wait until later to have another round. I was adjusting rather quickly to being naked around Edward. His beautiful form still took my breath away, but it comforted me to know that somehow, I had the same effect on him. I felt the cool breeze of his breath on the back of my neck. I tried to stretch myself out as little as possible, not wanting to move away not even an inch. I sighed as I placed my head back down on his chest. _

_."Good morning, beautiful." he told me as he kissed my cheek._

"_Good morning," I said as I snuggled even more in to his chest._

"_Did you sleep well, my love?" he asked, kissing right by my ear._

_I nodded, "Yes, very well." as I looked up to his face._

_He chuckled and began kissing along my jaw line. It was certainly a pleasant way to wake up._

"_And how was your night?" I asked him, trying to distract him._

_He continued to kiss me, working his way down my neck. "Absolutely amazing and perfect," he replied, with his lips still pressed against my skin. I felt his hands begin to wander across my stomach and work their way up to my chest._

"_Really?" he didn't respond, he just pulled away and stared at me. _

_Edward locked his gaze with mine, and took in a deep raged breath and for the first time, I realized something. He, my perfect Greek God, was being dazzled by me. _

_I let out a low laugh. _

"_What?" he narrowed his eyes and looked at me with a worried expression._

"_Nothing, you just, I dazzled you. For once I'm not the one being dazzled by you." I smiled widely_

"_Well as I have said before, you have a strange way of looking at yourself. You don't see yourself for the lavishing beautiful creature you really are."_

"_I'm ordinary, boring. Nothing special." I stated._

_He just shook his head. He leaned his head down and whispered in my ear. As he kissed my neck._

"_You are so far from the truth. You are so much more special and not ordinary there are no real words to describe how special you are. Especially to me." _

_We laid there in each others arms for what felt like hours, just staring into each others eyes._

_We heard the door burst open and we both jumped, pulling the blanket up around our naked torso._

"_Bella you cant hide from shopping all day!" Alice shouted, and stopped dead in her tracks as she entered the room. "Oh, I, uh, oh. Sorry, she turned around and walked out of the room swiftly. Leaving me and Edward speechless. We turned and looked at each other, not knowing what to say. I just started laughing. Soon we were both laughing at the expression on Alice's face as she burst into the room. We decided it would probably be a good thing to get out of bed, and go down stairs to Alice._

_Edward groaned. "Why cant we just get one peaceful day with out anyone barging into the room?" Edward asked as we walked down the stairs. I just laughed._

"_I didn't know!" Alice yelled from the living room. _

"_Well you could have knocked!" Edward walked into the room and looked at her annoyed._

"_Well excuse me If I got the vision last night and just assumed you'd be done by now!"_

"_The, what?" I asked she had a vision, oh god she saw._

"_I got a vision, of well. I don't really want to go through it again if ya don't mind."_

"_Well next time don't assume we'd be done." Edward said as he glared at her jokingly. I was still in shock she had a vision, of, that._

"_I'm just not going to look for either one of you when she stays the night. Its safer that way." she laughed._

"_Any news on when Carlisle and the others will be back?" I asked curiously. I wanted to know what was going on with Edward. Vampires don't just all of a sudden get the ability to cry real tears._

"_They should be back later today. You should be lucky I was the one to walk in on you two. Could you imagine?"_

"_Emmet, would never let it rest!" Edward said as he shook his head and laughed slightly._

_The afternoon went by fast. We were in the kitchen getting me something to eat when the rest of the family got home._

_Carlisle ran directly to Edward and just stared at him. _

"_Carlisle what are you looking at?" Edward asked as he took a step back. Emmet had me in a huge bare hug as Carlisle laughed. He sat me down on my feet and looked over toward Edward. The whole family just stared at him. I walked next to him and grabbed his hand in mine. _

"_You cried? So you had tears?" Carlisle asked_

"_Real tears?" Jasper added. _

"_They were real, all three of us saw them." I looked up at Edward as he said this, and then shook my head to agree._

"_They were real Carlisle, tears all down his face. It was, amazing." I stated. It truly was amazing, he had cried, over me. Vampire crying, I doubt whether I had anything to do with the sudden tear factor but I could dream._

"_Weird is more like it." Alice said as she squinted her eyes. _

"_Well, this, I have never heard of anything. But I'll get to the bottom of it, I promise." Carlisle said as he glided out the kitchen presumably into his study to search through his many books. _

_Everyone was asking us what had happen for we realized Edward had tears in his eyes. All I could do was stare at the counter top. I was going to leave Edward because he wasn't going to change me. That would go over well. Edward put his arm around my waist and pulled me close to him. I felt a wave of calm run through the room and I glanced up at jasper and tried to smile. _

"_I, Bella, and me got into a small fight. I refused to change her ever. I didn't want to put her through what we all have been through. We didn't have a choice, she does. And I wanted her to be sure of her decision. And I thought that sometime, ten years, what ever. Down the road she would regret her decision and regret being with me. And I couldn't have that happen. So that is why I have refused to change her, I didn't want her to go through that. Or the pain of the transformation." _

"_Edward, I would never regret being with you. Ever." _

"_I know that Bella, but what happens down the road. I couldn't have you regretting anything, I didn't want you to miss the human experiences, being human. Charlie, Renee. So I told her I couldn't. She didn't like that. She told me that she couldn't do this anymore. She couldn't go through being with me, and growing old while I stayed seventeen forever. And knowing someday down the road we would have to part ways, she would die. So I had to make a decision. Let her walk out of my life forever. Or agree to change her, eventually."_

"_Soon!" I added. Everyone was staring at me wide eyed. I felt bad, the way Edward explained it, It was like I had manipulated him into changing me. "I knew that I would grow old and eventually die, have to say goodbye to Edward. I knew I couldn't do that, I knew the longer we were together the harder it would be." I frowned and looked away from there wondering faces. _

"_I ran out of the room after her and told her I would agree to it. But she had to give me time, give her self time to make sure its what she wants. I told her how much I cared about her. She turned around and realized I had tears in my eyes. And that's when she screamed for Alice. She then called Carlisle." _

"_Wow." Emmet explained. "That's, Bella we all knew you would be one of us eventually. I don't know why you worried about it."_

"_Because Emmet, you know your brother as well as I do. He makes up his mind, its very hard to change it."_

"_He isn't the only one who can do it ya know."_

"_Yes but he is the only one I want to do it." I smiled. I looked up and saw Alice in jaspers arms. They weren't really even paying attention to the rest of us. I smiled as I saw just from the look in there eyes how truly in love they were. _

"_Well I am going to go tell Carlisle. We will figure this out don't you worry." Esme said as she strolled out._

"_You guys are like extremely happy. It cant all be just because dear Edward here is a sissy." Emmet said laughing as Rose smacked him._

_Edward froze, and looked away. I felt my cheeks blush. Emmet walked past me and froze. _

"_Oh. My. God." I jumped at his sudden out burst. "I don't know why I didn't realize it earlier you reek of, Edward!" he jumped back and looked at me. I refused to meet his gaze._

"_Emmet, leave it alone." Edward said sternly_

"_You two totally did it!" _

"_Emmet!" Rose shrieked as she grabbed his arm and pulled him away. She shot us a glance of apology and walked out of the kitchen, a hollering Emmet being forcefully dragged behind her._

"_I am, so, sorry!" Edward laid his head on my shoulder._

"_It's ok, they would have found out eventually." _

"_Yea I suppose, but I'm still sorry."_

"_Don't be." I said as Esme walked back into the kitchen._

"_I'm sorry dear. But I have some bad news. Your going to have to go home later today." she said as she looked at me._

"_What? Why?" Edward said as he stood up. _

"_Because Edward this is a small town. People we'll know we are back early. Bella is supposed to be here, alone with Alice. Us being back means your back. Charlie will not be happy if she stays another night and he hears we came back early."_

"_But." Edward tried to protest._

"_Edward, if you ever want her to be able to stay here again. We must do our best to appease Charlie."_

"_Fine." he scowled _

"_Edward, its ok, you'll just stay with me tonight."_

"_Yea, I guess."_

_Alice drove me back to my house, Edward was going to meet me there later today. That way Charlie wouldn't get upset. She helped me carry my bags inside. We had went 'shopping' at least that's what Charlie would be told. _

"_Bella?" _

"_Yes Dad." I heard Charlie get off the chair and walk into the hallway._

"_Well that's a lot of bags."_

"_I took her shopping early this morning. We just got back. My mother had called me while we were shopping and told me they were coming home early." Alice said as she smiled up at him._

"_Oh, your parents and the rest of your family are home now?"_

"_I don't know if there home yet but they will be back some time today."_

"_Well thank you Alice. That was very responsible of you to Bring Bella back early." _

"_It was Bella's idea. She thought it would be best if she came home today. She didn't want to make you angry for staying there." I was shocked what was Alice doing." My dad looked at me in awe._

"_I, yea Dad, figured you'd rather have me home early than stay there when, Edward was home." I smiled up at him. _

"_Bella, that was very responsible of you. Maybe I don't, have to worry so much about you." he walked back into the living room. I glanced over at Alice she just had an extremely large grin on her face._

_We walked into my room and I threw the bags onto the floor. _

"_What was that?" _

"_What was what Bella?"_

"_You know what."_

"_It worked didn't it? No more over bearing Charlie."_

"_Yea, I guess. But that doesn't help the fact I cant stay at your house tonight."_

"_Well no, but that also gave Charlie the realization your not a kid anymore and that he can trust you."_

"_Now I am going to stay here until Edward comes. He is back at the house with Carlisle."_

"_Any news on the whole tear thing?"_

"_None, Carlisle is calling some of his old friends."_

"_Oh." _

"_Bella, this never happen before to my knowledge. This is totally new. And I also have a feeling that it has nothing to do with anything they are going to find in books. It has to do with you, and how much my brother loves you. And the thought of loosing you, for a second time. Killed him. Hence the tears. Great sadness, in a vampire." I looked at her blankly. "Most Vampires aren't sad, they like the life they were given. Most don't care as much about others as my brother cares about you." _

_I still didn't know what to say, so I just nodded. He had cried because he loved me to much to bare the thought of loosing me again. It made me smile, to know that he cared that much. I knew he did, but it was still nice to see it. _

_We went downstairs and I made dinner for Charlie. Of course Alice excused herself from eating. Charlie never thought anything about it. He eventually left to go to the Clearwater's house ever since Harry's death, everyone has been helping them out. _

_About an hour after Charlie left there was a knock on the door. I ran to it, expecting Edward. I smiled beamingly as I opened the door. My smile vanished. _

"_Hey Bells." he smiled down at me. His smile vanished when he saw Alice standing behind me. She just smiled at him. "What's she doing here?"_

"_She, has a name! Alice is here because Victoria is still out there, and because I want her here!" _

"_Well I didn't mean anything by it. I just thought, something, happen."_

"_Like what?" I asked annoyed._

"_I can I talk to you? Alone." he said as he looked at Alice._

"_I don't think that's wise Bella." She said as she put her hand on my shoulder._

"_I'll be fine, just stay here ill be right outside."_

"_She can hear me. I don't care. I meant alone as in away from Charlie." Jacob stated._

"_Oh. He isn't home." but I walked outside anyway shuting the door behind us. I walked to my truck. _

"_What is it Jake?"_

"_I need to talk to you. I guess it doesn't matter if, Alice. Hears or not. It involves her. But I have a message for you."_

"_What kind of message?"_

"_We were out last night patrolling. Embry came across her trail first. He told us but he didn't wait for us. He followed it on his own. She was feeding on another hiker." My face cringed as he told his story. Victoria was still out there, and close. And she was killing innocent people. "Luckily Embry came across her before she finished him. But we couldn't stop it. We had to kill him ourselves. The transformation had already began to take effect." He looked at me with sadness in his eyes. "She got real pissed that Embry interrupted her dinner."_

"_Oh my god, Jake, now tell me he's ok!"_

"_No, he's fine, for the most part. He'll heal. She got a hold of him. Roughed him up a bit. He had cuts and bruises, his arm was broken. But we heal fast Bells. He's pretty much good as new already. A little sore but that's about it."_

"_What's the message?" Alice asked look of concern on her face. Just then we heard the squealing of tires as they pulled around the corner and came to a sudden stop out front.. It was the Volvo. Edward was next to me within seconds. _

"_Bella, are you ok?" _

"_Yea I'm fine, Jacob was telling us what happen last night, he didn't get to finish." I told him, knowing he already knew what Jacob was about to say._

"_Ok, go on." he said politely to Jacob._

"_She left a message with Embry. For you, for all of us. Including your family." He said as he looked to Edward and Alice._

"_What message Jake, just tell me."_

"_If we don't hand you over by tomorrow night. She's going to start picking us off. One by one. All of us. She said she'll pick off your friends and family. And she specifically said shed save us three for last. That way you can watch as she tortures us." He said as he glanced to Alice and Edward. Tears were falling from my face uncontrollable. I couldn't stop myself, I tried to fight them away but nothing could subdue them. My head was spinning. Everyone I loved everyone I cared about, she would kill them to get to me. She would kill them in front of me just for mere sport. Quill, Embry, Sam. The whole pack. She would come after Charlie, and Renee. She would go after Jacob and his family. Maybe even friends from school. She would kill the Cullen's. she would save Alice and Edward for last. She would make me watch her torture them. Making me wish for death. She would take Edward from me. I would loose him yet again._

_**A/N: **_

_**Hey not sure what i should do. I'm thinking of killing someone off. But not sure if I should. And if I do, who do I kill? Lol.. Not sure… lemme kno! Ima add a poll so check it out!!**_


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: thanks for all the alerts+ and reviews.. **

**thank** **you Angel of Sinne for the great review!! YOU ALL SHOULD CHECK OUT HER STORY **

**Minutes to Midnight ITS REALLY GOOD SO FAR.. SO CHECK IT OUT!! **

**ALSO... **

**twilightaddict26 updated her story...  
Not So Sweet Reunion **

**check it out!!**

**Chapter 16: Fight**

I collapsed to the ground. Edwards quick arms caught me before I hit. I was motionless as he gently placed me down on his lap. Alice was talking on the phone to Carlisle I assume. Jacob was kneeling over me. Fear was all across his face. I could hear them talking I could see them. But my body was paralyzed I couldn't move, I couldn't talk. I couldn't bring my mouth to move.

"Edward, is she ok. Is she going to be ok?"

"Jake I don't know, she just fainted it was a lot to take in. My dads on his way."

"I shouldn't of told her, I knew I shouldn't have told her, I knew I should have come to you and just told you. I'm sorry Bella."

"Jacob, don't. She needed to know anyway. We don't have secrets. Where is the rest of your pack?"

"Patrolling. They aren't going to let Victoria get past them."

"Your pack has grown?"

"What?"

"You just thought, the pack grew."

"Oh I forgot you could do that, yeah it grew they aren't up to speed yet, but give it a day or two they will be."

"I just hope we have that long."

"Victoria wants a fight. She's only one vampire. We can take her!"

"Have you been able to get her yet? Now I don't think so. Neither have we. Shes got something else up her sleeve. She wouldn't make an empty threat. And she knows how big my family is. If she attacked she would surely die.:

"If she was alone. What if she has help? Is that possible? Do your kind ever go for help? I mean I've heard stories that they stick to groups of two. But your family is bigger than that."

"Its rare. Were only able to do it so well because we don't fight over food, we don't kill humans for our food. Its easier to coincide that way"

"What if she had help though?"

"Its possible. She would have to have more than one persons help though."

"And if she does?"

"Then my family and Bella might be the ones that need help, and everyone else on her little hit list. Including you and your pack."

"We need to find out what she's got on her side, and how many."

"Yes, we do. Can you contact your pack leader, and have him go outside the border. Sniff for any other vampires other than us?"

"I can try, but they don't all know you guys scent."

"My family will be here any minute. Would you be able to relay the smell to them?" I heard Jacobs low growl as he cringed his nose. "You don't smell to appealing to me either, but it's the only chance we've got."

My mouth finally moved, I tried to open my mouth more, and tell them not to start fighting. My voice was shaky and it cracked my throat was on fire.

"Bella. What was that my love." Edward asked me as he kissed my forehead.

"I. Said. Stop. Fighting, its not solving, anything." That was like a mouth full. But I got it out, it was shaky. I was scared. Not for myself but everyone I cared about.

Alice came out of the house with a glass of water, and made me drink it. It helped my throat was no longer on fire.

"Bella are you ok?"

"Alice, I'm fine. I think."

"What happen?" Jacob asked as Edward helped me to sit up.

"I, I panicked. She's coming after you guys. I cant let her do that. I have to go to her. Make this all stop. One of you already got hurt. I will not let her kill my family! Whether or not you guys like each other or not. Your ALL my family. I wont let any harm come to you, because of me."

"Bella we'll take care of her. Just stop. Your not doing anything crazy like turning yourself over. You did that last time! And see how well that worked out?" Edward forced.

"Yea perfect. If you wouldn't have killed James she wouldn't be after me. She wouldn't use everyone I care about to get me. You cant protect me forever!" Edward eyes got wider. As he shot his head toward Alice and glared.

"DON'T YOU EVEN THINK THAT!" he shot at her. She jumped, and looked away from his gaze. "Alice I swear to god, if you even."

"Edward! If she really does have help. What else is there to do? We cant just sit around and let her attack us one by one. We cant let her get to Bella!" she shouted.

"Do they do this a lot?" Jacob whispered to me, confusion on his face.

"Enough to the point it gets annoying. What's going on, what does Alice think?" Edward shot a quick angry glance back at Alice. She bit her bottom lip. "EDWARD?"

"She thought nothing, its stupid!"

Just as I was about to fight him the rest of the Cullen's pulled up. Jacobs eyes grew wide with worry.

"You'll be fine. Bella would kill any of us if we even though it." Edward assured him.

"But you might still want to call Sam and tell him what's going on. I think it best we all get together and talk. I would like to speak to Sam. If we are going to overcome this, we need to join forces. At least until Victoria is stopped, and I am sure he will agree." Carlisle said in a slow polite tone as he smiled at Jacob.

He walked into my house and the rest followed him. Edward carried me over to the couch. I heard Carlisle tell Jacob about the clearing they played Baseball in. To meet them there later that night. He walked over to me and kneeled beside the couch.

"Carlisle I'm fine." Edward growled. "Really, I'm ok. As I assured everyone. Edward and Jacob both insisted that Carlisle check me out. And to there surprise I was perfectly fine.

"It was a bit of the nerves, she got over excited, stressed. She fainted."

"See told you all I was fine."

"Good to have ya back little sis. Good thing your fine, I mean what would you and Edward do tonight if you were to incapacitated to do the deed." Emmet chuckled as he patted me on the back. I heard a low throaty growl come from behind us. I turned around to see Jacobs hurt expression on his face.

My phone rang and Jacob answered it. He hung up and walked back to the living room area where everyone was.

"We have a problem." he stated as he looked around at everyone else. My door suddenly flung open and Quil and Embry came bustling in. Embry's arm was still in a sling. Good as new, right.

"Oh we have a serious problem." Quil stated as the Cullen's backed slowly away.

"Its beginning to reek in here." Rose said as she walked into the kitchen, Esme behind her.

"You have got to be kidding me?" Edward asked as his face dropped and his eyes got wide. A look of fear came across his face, if you would of blinked you'd have missed it.

"What is it? What's the problem?" I asked annoyed.

"Carlisle. What have you heard about rogue wolves?"

"Rogue what?" I was being ignored. I stood up and yanked on the back of Edwards shirt. "Rogue wolves?"

"its nothing to worry yourself about Bella, I promise nothing will hurt you."

"Edward, don't lie to me!"

"Bella I promise."

"Edward your scared. You all are! So don't stand there and lie to me! Any of you!"

"Bella, dear. A rogue wolf. There very rare. I myself have only ever heard of two. One was killed in Italy. The other was presumed to be dead, no one has heard of him in over hundred years."

"What is a rogue wolf?"

"A werewolf gone bad." Jacob answered me as he lowered his head. "It's rare, there isn't really any reason to go bad. To work for our enemy." he said as he scanned the room. "Sam said that sometimes when something bad happens, the person gives up entirely on our beliefs and begins a life of solitude. He leaves and becomes a loner. Some go mad. They attack people. Attack other wolves. But he has never heard of one working with vampires."

"What do you mean? There is a rogue wolf out there working with Victoria?" I spat as I tried to calculate the odds.

"I don't know Bells, Sam just came across a wolfs trail. It wasn't any of ours. And a few feet away, he caught a whiff of Victoria." Edward tightened his grip on me as I shuttered at Jacobs words. "I'm sorry Bella, but we have to go. We have to prepare for tonight." he gave me a hug and walked out. Quil and Embry nodded.

"Tonight?" I asked I'm amazement.

"Yes, tonight we go to the field and talk to the pack. We have to come up with some game plan, we have to find out what Victoria is hiding. And who she has on her side. You however will stay here with Alice."

"WHAT?" we both blurted out simultaneously.

"It's to dangerous!"

"Edward everything is always to dangerous for me! I'm surprised you let me breath on my own!" I shouted. How could he think he wasn't going to include me in any of this. He was seriously mistaken. There was now way he was keeping me away.

"It's to dangerous, we might not handle being around the entire pack so well. This was easy were un matched. They were out numbered. Tonight will be much different. It might not go over so well. There might be a fight. And there is no way in hell I am letting you be around that."

"And there is no way in hell you can keep me away!" I pulled away from him. "Everything is always to dangerous. We can do this we can't do that. We cant be to close, We cant go here or there, We cant have sex. But news flash. We already did, and you were fine last night! Just fine! Nothing happen, I'm living I'm alive I'm FINE! So god dammit I'm going!" Everyone's eyes grew wide at my sudden out burst. As I realized what exactly I had said. Edward just stood there amazed and shocked. My mouth fell open as Carlisle looked at Edward. Esme and Rose were standing in the doorway to the kitchen in amazement.

My face flushed red.

"I uh, yes I was fine last night, but did you have to tell my entire family?" Edward asked as he lowered his head away from his families gaze.

"That's what you meant when you said 'to do the deed'" Carlisle asked Emmett he just lowered his face to look at the floor. "I think we have to have a talk later Edward."

"Of course we do." Edward rolled his eyes. I mouthed I'm sorry. He grinned at me.

"Ok you can come, but only because even if I do leave you here. Even if I do chain you to the bed. You'd still find away to come." Edward said as he put his arm around me

"Yes I would."

"We have to go I have to go look for something anything that will be able to help us. Emmet, Jasper and Alice. I want you to stay here with Edward and Bella. Rose I want you to help Esme call our friends in Denali and ask if they have ever heard of such a thing." and with that Carlisle, Esme and Rose left.

"So a rogue wolf. that's bad right?" I asked. It was a dumb question, but it broke the silence.

"Yes, very bad. Carlisle told me about the only two he knew of. The one that was killed I Italy was very strong, very agile. And very cunning. But he was killed for attacking people. The other, everyone just assumed he was killed. No one has heard of him in over a hundred years. He was lethal. He was huge, and he was a killer, he didn't care who he killed. Woman children. Didn't matter to him it was all the same. He slaughtered hundreds of people. He took out entire packs single handedly. He blamed the wolf gene on loosing his wife and two kids. It was a rogue wolf who killed his family. When his family was killed. He snapped, every werewolf pack he came across he annihilated them. Killing them all, even the receivers of the gene who hadn't transformed yet. He killed them all, killing that families gene with them."

"Oh my god." I gasped. "But he's dead right?"

"Nobody knows for sure. But presumably yeah." Edward said as my mouth opened in shock. He could still be out there. Great. I was scared. Tears starting rolling down my face. Edward put his hands on my cheek and wiped them away.

"He could still be out there." I whispered.

"Bella, I wont let anyone touch you. No one will ever hurt you! There's nothing to be scared about." Edward replied to me as he squeezed me tighter.

"Yea Bella, we'll protect you." Emmet said as he smiled. It didn't reach his eyes.

"Really? Then why do you look scared? Why is Alice speechless for once in her life? Why does jasper keep trying to calm me down, and why is Edward have tears in his eyes again?" I was close to yelling. Everyone looked at Edward as he pulled his arm away from me and felt for his cheeks and eyes.

"Dude that is seriously weird." Emmet said as he walked over and looked directly at Edward.

"Thanks!" Edward said sarcastically as he wiped his face in his sleeve.

"Bella, we are scared. I will admit it. But we will not let anything happen to you." Jasper said as he sent out another wave of calm.

"I know you guys will try, but there's always a possibility." I couldn't bring myself to say the words.

"We wont get hurt either." Jasper said as he walked over to me and put an arm on my shoulder. We can fight this. We just need to know what were fighting.

"Jasper. If anything happens. To any of you, vampire, or werewolf. I will never forgive myself. It will always be my fault."

"Nothing is going to happen to us. Were not scared for us. Were scared for you." jasper said as he walked over to look at Edward. He shook his head and laughed as he walked back to Alice.

"We need to all calm down and look normal. Charlie is a little more than a minute away." Edward stated.

We all sat down and turned the TV on.

"Bella?"

"Yea Dad. Were in here."

"We?"

"You've met Emmet and Jasper right?"

"Your brothers, right?" he asked Alice.

"One of them. Emmet. Jasper not so much." Charlie just nodded as he put his gun away.

After I made dinner, Alice, Jasper, and Emmett left. Edward went outside and snuck back in my window. We waited up stairs in my room until Charlie went to bed, and was fast asleep. We snuck out my window and ran. By now I was used to the running. It still made me dizzy sometimes but I didn't mind it gave me an excuse to be close to Edward.

"Were almost there, we can walk from here." Edward said as he came to a stop.

**EDWARDS POV**

"Edward, can I ask you something?"

"Anything?" what did she want to know?

"I've been thinking since earlier when it happen." She paused. "What did Alice think that got you so upset?"

"Nothing."

"Edward!"

"Ok, fine. She thought about us changing you now. Then Victoria would have no one to go after. You'd be human." her eyes grew wide with excitement.

"Do it, Do it now!" she stopped walking.

"Bella I cant just do it now. I could kill you! I need to prepare I need to hunt before I even attempt to do it. Besides, she didn't just threaten you, a human, she threatened all of us, Vampires, and Jacob, werewolves. She is not just about the humans anymore."

"But I could help."

"Bella, it takes time for you to be able to even resist the blood lust. Let alone learn everything you would need to learn to keep yourself safe, let alone fight off someone else." she sighed, and looked sad. "Bella, I will change you, I promised you. I will keep that promise. Just give me time."

"What if we don't have time? What if.." I cut her off, how could she think like that.

"Bella, we will make it through this. I promise, I will never let anything or anyone hurt you." I kissed her cheek, her neck, and eventually found her lips. She pulled me in closer. Her arms wrapped around my neck, I felt her knot her hands in my hair.

She tripped and fell backwards. I caught her, gently placing her on the grass. She moaned, when I slid my hands down her sides.

I pulled away.

"Bella." I shook my head trying to clear my thoughts.

"Edward." she sighed.

"I would not object, if it were under different circumstances. But not only do we have a wolf watching us. But my family is in listening range." I sighed, and stood up. Pulling her to her feet.

"Humph" she squinted her eyes. "Who was watching?"

"We better go love." I led her through the woods toward the clearing.

"Who?"

"Embry was walking toward to the rest of the pack and heard us. He stopped and saw."

"Great!"

"If the pack hadn't already seen that all, I doubt he would have told if he had any control over it. don't blame him."

"I don't, I'm just not looking forward to the looks were going to get." She laughed as we stepped into the clearing. Sure enough my family was staring in our direction. Emmett was grinning from ear to ear. Jasper was looking at us curiously, Alice was beaming. Carlisle and Esme. Well they were just looking at us, Carlisle was shaking his head.

"Now that everyone is here. We can begin" Carlisle yelled.

"They don't trust us enough to come to close. But they will change into human form but they will stay at the edge of the woods." Trust us. Ha I don't trust them. Stupid dogs.

They all walked forward into the clearing. Sam nodded to Carlisle.

I saw Jacob smile at Bella. She grinned back at him. His smile grew. He was really getting on my nerves, and the fantasies. God he needed to stop. Over and over he imagined himself with Bella, holding her, hugging her, kissing her. Ugh I had enough. I glared at him, and wrapped my arms around Bella and kissed her on the cheek. That got him to stop. Now he's imagining me, killing me. It made me laugh. Bella glanced up at me questionably. I leaned down and kissed her passionately on her lips. She put her hands on the back of my neck. I heard a low growl not even loud enough for Bella to hear.

I looked up and smiled at Jacob. He just scowled at me. Bella must have known what I was doing. She smacked my harm lightly and smiled up at me.

"I have checked all my sources, I've called around. No one has heard of a rogue wolf for over a hundred years. Since Marcus."

"We don't know for sure if it is a rogue wolf. It just wasn't one of us." Sam stated. "If we are going to be looking for other vampires. We are going to need to know your scent. So we don't get confused. The only one we know is the boy, and girl." He shifted his eyes to Alice and me. I didn't like the look on his face. I growled a low growl. Bella squeezed my arm.

"I assume you mean Edward, and Alice?"

Sam looked to Jacob, he nodded. "Yes."

"By all means you are helping us keep Bella Safe. What ever you need." Carlisle was to polite. Sam, Jacob and Embry Stepped forward. He was no longer in the sling. Slowly they started walking toward us. Taking a whiff of every single one of us. Jacob Stopped in front of me. He wrinkled his nose up and glared.

"Hey Jake" Bella stepped forward. I kept my arm around her.

"Bella." Jacob smiled at her, I saw his eyes flicker to me for a moment. Quickly his thoughts went to dreams, dreams of Bella, and him. I couldn't take it anymore. I pulled Bella back and positioned her so she was slightly behind me. Jacob growled, and started to shake. Sam was talking to Carlisle at the moment, he quickly was at Jacobs side in a matter of seconds. He put his hand on Jacobs shoulder. Jacob looked away, and calmed himself down. Carlisle looked at me sternly. I sighed, and loosened my grip on Bella.

Carlisle and Sam went back to talking. I paid no attention to them. I was to involved on watching Jacob.

"Bella, we will protect you."

"I know Jake. But what if something happens to you guys?" Embry laughed.

"Bella you worry to much." he laughed again

"Nothings going to happen to us." Jacob assured her. I wish something would, but I knew I shouldn't. I shook the thought out of my head. Bella would never forgive me, for even thinking it.

"Jake Embry." Sam called them.

"Bye Bella." They said as the walked back to the rest of the pack with Sam.

"We will see you again tomorrow. Same time." Carlisle said to Sam. As he walked toward Esme.

"Yes, tomorrow." Sam disappeared into the woods behind the rest of them. Jacob shot Bella one last glance and disappeared. I let out a low throaty growl.

"What is your problem?" Bella shot at me.

"What?"

"Why are you growling? What did Jake do?"

"He didn't do anything, he thought a hell of a lot!" I shot. I slumped to the ground and sat there. I should have more control than this. He shouldn't get to me this much. I realized I had raised my voice I looked up at Bella, her face was blank with emotion. "I'm sorry. Bella I'm so sorry. He just, he has a very good imagination that's all."

"No, I'm sorry you had to see that."

"You know what I saw?"

"No but I can only imagine what he was making you see." I grabbed her arm and pulled her into my lap. I put my face into her hair. "You smell amazing."

"Don't I always?" she laughed at me.

"Yes, you do." I brought my lips to hers.

"God do you guys every take a break?" Emmett asked. I pulled away and wiped my lips with my thumb and pointer finger.

"So what's going on?" Bella asked.

"Sam is going to keep an eye out for the other wolf, and also other vampires that might be in the area. So we can try to find out what or who Victoria might have. So we'll be ready. I have Alice looking for things also." I looked over to Alice she was sitting with her legs crossed eyes closed. And Jasper was holding her hand. "We are going to keep a look out on our end. Until we find out exactly what were up against. I do not want Bella to be alone at all."

"And when we find out? What then? What are we going to do?" Bella asked Carlisle. I heard the answer before he even said it. I didn't like it at all.

"Sam and I both agreed, your safety is the number one priority. We both feel that there's no other way around it." Carlisle said as he looked to the ground and back up to Bella.

"No other way around what exactly?" I saw the fear in Bella's face. I wrapped my arm around her tighter. I knew what was coming and she wasn't going to like it.

Carlisle looked at her sympathetically.

"We fight."

**A/N: **

**Hey not sure what i should do. I'm thinking of killing someone off. But not sure if I should. And if I do, who do I kill? Lol.. Not sure… lemme kno! I added a poll so check it out!!**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: that's for all the alerts+ and reviews.. **

**I would like to thank Angel of Sinne for an AWESOME!! Review!! She rocks!! **

**You should so check out her story.. Minutes to Midnight.. Its really good. And full of sexual tension and frustration… lol**

**Everyone wants there very own Edward.. We should boycott! **

**Chapter 17: Clearing**

**BELLAS POV**

I shook involuntarily. Fight? They were all going to fight. They were going to get hurt, or worse, killed. Tears started to brim over. I couldn't fight them off anymore.

"Fight? You want to fight?" My voice was shaky.

"Bella, it's going to be ok." Edward whispered in my ear. I pushed away from him. It wasn't going to be alright. It was far from alright.

"NO, no its not! Everything is going wrong. You all are going to fight, your going to risk your lives for me. I can't allow that. I cant let you risk your life for me." I stood up and started walking toward the woods.

"Where are you going?" Edward asked as he was right beside me.

"To Victoria." Edward grabbed my arms and pulled me back I struggled to break free.

"Edward let me go!" I screamed, from beneath my now tear covered face. How could I let them all risk there lives.

"Bella, Please stop. Be reasonable!" Edward begged as he pulled me to the ground and held me. I tried once to get free, but his super human vampire strength wasn't letting me move an inch. Everyone else was huddled around us. Trying to calm me down.

"I am being reasonable! I cant let any of you die for me! I'm who she wants. No one has to get hurt. Just let me go. Please!" I begged, I was pleading with him to let me walk to my own death.

"Bella, we can't do that. I wont let her get her hands on you!" Edward said as he hugged me closer.

"Please." I begged. "Edward, what if she gets someone, what if she gets Alice?" Jasper tightened his grip around Alice's waist as I said that. "What about Rose? Or Esme?" I looked at all there faces they were blank, emotionless. They were hiding there fear from me. "Edward. What if she gets a hold of you? I couldn't live with myself. I cant loose you!"

"And I cant loose you Bella!" He said as he pulled my face to look at his. He was crying again. It was still weird seeing tears on his face. But I knew he meant every word. He was crying, crying for me. I stopped fighting with him. I collapsed in his chest and sobbed.

I didn't realize we had moved until I felt the wind in my hair. I looked up. I was in Edwards arms, and he was jogging through the woods. He slowed to a walk. And I saw Emmet and Alice beside him. I felt a wave of calm roll over us. I lifted my head to see behind Edward. Jasper was smiling at me.

"Do you want to walk yourself?" Edward asked. I shook my head.

"No but can you put me down for a minute?" He gently placed me on my feet. "I have to go to her." Edward let out a low throaty growl.

"Bella."

"Edward. I cant let any of you get hurt because of me. Jasper, what if she gets Alice? Or Emmett, what if she grabs rose and tortures her? What will you do? Who will you blame? Cause I sure as hell know who I'll blame. every time I look in the mirror. There death will be on my head!" Jasper took a step closer to Alice. Emmett just looked up into the sky. We all stood there in silence for a long while.

"I'm not going to let her get anyone, Rose, Alice, Esme, or you! Or any of my brothers. Trust me when I say that Bella. She comes near any of you. I'll kill her." Emmett hissed.

"Neither will I Bella, no one will touch you, or any of us." Edward said as he wrapped his arms around me. I started to sob again. I felt strong arms grab both Edward and me. I looked up to see Emmett smiling down at me.

"No one will hurt my family. Your part of my Family Bella." He said as he released us from his hold. "Now lets get you home."

Edward lifted me off my feet into his arms. We started jogging again.

When we reached my house, Emmett, Alice and Jasper said good night. Edward and me were suddenly in my room. He placed me on my bed gently.

"Where'd they go?" I asked quietly

"They are checking around your house. Making sure no one is near."

"Oh." all I could think to say was oh. It seemed to suit. How could I think of anything to really say. My, family. That's what they were now. They were all my family, and they were all out there risking there lives.

"Bella, please love. Try and sleep. This has been a long day for you, for all of us."

"Edward. I, I need you to promise me something."

"Ok anything."

"I need you to promise me. But don't make promises you cant keep do you hear?"

"Yes, Bella, what is it?"

"Promise me, no one will get hurt. Promise me we'll all get through this. Including Jacob and the pack. Promise me!" I was begging. Even though I knew he couldn't make that promise.

"Bella, I, cant." his face turned into a frown. "I cant promise you nothing will happen to Jacob and them. I have no control over them. But I can tell you they are strong, they all are. There like a family themselves and families look after one another. Just like my family. Were all strong Bella. We all will be ok. I can't promise no one will get hurt. But I can promise you that none of us will die if I have anything to do about it. We will protect ourselves. We will protect you. We ALL will get through this. Vampire, werewolf it doesn't matter you care about them, so I will try to protect them the best I can."

"Thank you Edward. I know that takes a lot from you."

"I mean every word. I know if something happens to Jacob, or any of the pack. It will hurt you, and I promised you I would not let anything ever hurt you again. I intend to stick to my word." I smiled up at him, and pulled him closer to me. I snuggled myself against his body as he stood in front of me. I wrapped my legs behind his knees and pulled him onto the bed. He rolled over me and laid next to my side. I laid in his arms for what felt like hours even though it was only a few minutes. Edward began to hum my lullaby in my ear.

"I love you Bella. Nothing will happen, I intend to spend the rest of eternity with you." I smiled up at him.

"I love you Edward, and I can not wait for that day to finally begin." he laughed, as I closed my eyes and drifted off into a dreamless night.

It's been three days, three long days since everyone decided it'd be better to risk ALL of there lives instead of just mine. So far nothing, not a trace of her, its like she just disappeared, but I wasn't that lucky. She'd be back, with a vengeance. She would come for me or some one I loved it was just a matter of when and who she would go for first.

Alice, Edward, Emmet and Jasper were at my house waiting for Quil Embry and Jacob to get here with last nights news. The past three days have went by very slow. Every loud noise I jump, expecting someone to run out and grab me. Every days the same since the last meeting we had at night. The plans were all set in motion. Carlisle and Sam had exchanged all the information they had. Now it was up to us. It was like she had vanished. So the secret nightly meetings have been put off until one side picks up something.

I insisted it would be easier with out these stupid boundaries and they both agreed but only if it came down to fighting. Even though we all knew it would eventually. She wouldn't just give up.

"Where are they? We do have lives!" Emmett said as he sat down on the couch.

"What do you have planned that's sooooo important?" I asked.

"Nothing, I just don't like waiting for, dogs."

"Emmet. You know how Bella feels." Edward said as he looked at me and smiled.

"Fine sorry! But that's what they are. It's not a lie."

"So when I yell at Jake for calling you a bloodsucker? that's ok right?"

"Well no, I fine. Emmett's wrong I'm always wrong."

"Your not always wrong." I looked at Edward and he just shook his head.

"Rose that bad is she?" he asked his brother.

"No, she's just, I don't know I can't do anything right. She's on edge cause of, everything, and then the fact that I'm running around associating with werewolves has her pissed off."

"She knows It's only because it's the easiest way, I mean if we need help against a rogue werewolf. What better way to win than to have an entire pack behind us?" Alice asked as she flipped through a magazine.

"Yes she understands, but it doesn't mean she's thrilled about it. So she's taking everything out on me. I don't get her sometimes."

"You and me both." Edward said. It wanted to ask why she hates me so much, but I figured now wasn't the time. I mean I never did anything to her. Except put her entire family at risk and put her sometimes husband in danger, but nothing to big. I rolled my eyes to myself. She was the least of my problems.

There was a knock on the door. Jake, Quil and Embry walked in.

"Finally!" Emmet said. Jacob looked toward him and glared slightly.

"Good news or bad news first?

"Uh, is there good news?" I asked. How could anything be good.

"Good enough, I guess." Quil smiled down at me.

"Ok, good news." We got her track again. She's with the wolf though."

"Is that the bad news?" Edward asked as he put his arms around me. I was hoping with all I could she would be gone forever. Wishful thinking obviously.

"Part of it. The other part, there's three missing people in the city, and there's another missing hiker. His campsite was found earlier today. There was blood."

"Great. Perfect, just what I need, more dead people on my back!" when was this going to stop? What was I thinking it was never going to stop until she got what she wanted. Me.

"Bella, its not your fault. You cant control her taking people. She would do it whether or not she was after you." Embry said as he put his arm on my shoulder.

"Yea but she's only here because of me."

"Charlie in 2 minutes." Edward announced.

"Should we go?" Quil turned around.

"Why would you need to go?" I asked confused.

"Well your dad. A house full of guys, and Alice." Everyone laughed.

"My dad knows all of you though. What do you think he's going to think were doing?"

"I don't know he's a cop for crying out loud how should I know?"

"Were plotting the towns take over." Embry added and grinned.

"Yea, the teenagers are going to take over and run the town." Emmet laughed. "It'd be a fun story to tell the judge. I'm sorry sir…." he was cut off by Charlie walking in.

"Wow, full house today." He smiled to see that it wasn't just the Cullen's here today. But Jake and his friends also. "Guys, Alice." he nodded.

"Hey dad."

"Bella you want me to order pizza?"

"Uh you might have to order the entire store, or are you forgetting who your feeding Charlie?" Jacob asked.

"That's right I forgot I was feeding the bottomless pit."

"It's ok we have to get going anyway. We'll see you guys later." Jacob said as he leaned down quickly hugged me and walked toward the door.

"Later tonight?" I whispered to Edward. He nodded.

Charlie ordered pizza. He said it was nice to give me a break from cooking every now and then. Of course Alice and Emmett excused themselves from eating. Edward took a piece for some reason. But I could of sworn I saw him throw it in the trash when Charlie wasn't looking.

I was up in my room after dinner waiting for Edward to sneak back in. Emmet and Alice would be taking his Volvo back. He would wait here with me like he did every night. Then when Charlie was asleep we would sneak out to meet the rest of them.

We were on our way to the clearing in the woods.

"So I see your starting to like Jacob" I smiled. As he placed me on my feet. We must have been close enough for me to walk.

"I'm a good pretender."

"See I don't think its just that, I think your actually starting to like him."

"Were enemies Bella, as soon as this is all over everything goes back to normal."

"It doesn't have to be." I sighed.

"Yes it does. It doesn't matter if we like each other or not. Which we don't. he's a werewolf I am a vampire. We don't mix. You'll see when you become one of us."

"Who says I am going to forget about Jake just because I'm going to be a vampire?"

"I didn't say you were. I just said you wouldn't be friends."

"I can still be friends with him." I said forcefully.

"Bella, he wont want to be. I hear what he thinks of us. All of us. It doesn't matter if cares about you now. When you turn, he thinks you wont be Bella anymore."

"Well that's just stupid!" I shot.

"Stupid or not that's what he thinks, and that's the way its supposed to be. Were enemies. Whether or not you want us to be or not we are. Especially me and Jacob. I put on a good face only because of you. But don't mistake my false friendship for the actual thing."

"Why not?"

"There's a few reasons which do you want first?"

"Don't give me the crap he's a werewolf you're a vampire."

"Ok fine. How's this. He fantasizes about you, in the most imaginative way possible just to piss me off and get to me. Or the fact that he tries to figure out ways to get you to leave me and go love him. Oh yeah were real great friends."

"You could be!"

"No we couldn't! Even if he wasn't a werewolf Bella. He is still my enemy. He is trying to take you, therefore sworn enemies, believe me he feels the same."

"Edward."

"Bella I'm sorry I wish it was different. I wish I could be friends with him even just for you. But when he makes me see the things he thinks of you, and imagines of you I want to rip his throat out." I shuttered at his words.

"I'm sorry he makes you think those things but Edward. I'm yours."

"And he doesn't want to except that."

"Can we agree to disagree?" I asked, I hated fighting with him.

"I think that best, seeing how the clearing is right through here." he smiled and kissed me as he pulled me through.

Carlisle and Sam were already talking. The rest of the Cullen's were sitting in the grass a little ways behind Carlisle. Jacob and the pack were standing behind Sam talking. Jacob looked up at me and smiled. He started toward us and was in front of me in no time.

"Bella." he nodded toward Edward. Edward slightly glared but nodded in response. How was I ever going to get them to be friends. I don't think it would ever be possible. Even if Jacob wasn't trying to take me away from Edward every chance he got.

"Hey Jake."

"You any better? You look a little bent out of shape." It startled me how I wasn't even in the clearing for more than a minute and he already knew something was bothering me.

"Nothing except bratty teenage werewolves and vampires who refuse to get along!" I said as I stalked away. I looked back slightly to see both of them standing there stunned. They looked at each other for a quick second before chasing off after me.

"Well that was a little rude there my love. I would hardly call myself bratty."

"What did I do?"

"You guys didn't do anything, I'm just sick of being put in the middle of your childish name calling and fights. So I'm done!"

"Done?" Edward was puzzled.

"Done what?" Jacob said as he crossed his arms in defense.

"I'm done fighting with you both. I'm done trying to get you to be civilized to each other. I will no longer be the middle man. I'm don't being the negotiator. I'm done trying to explain to Jake why you act the way you do Edward, and I'm done trying to tell Edward why you do the things you do, and I am most certainly done trying to sugar coat the fact that you put stupid little fantasies into Edwards head just to set him off. So ya know what. Tear each others throats out. Beat the crap out of each other.. Cause I'm done! I don't care anymore. I wish I could get my best friend and my boyfriend to at least be civil and mean it! I wish you two could just get alone for me. But I see that is never going to happen. So I'm done. Rip each other apart. Have fun!" I walked away from them again. I wasn't really as pissed off at them as I made it seem. I was mostly covering up the fact that I was scared for both of them, and everyone else. But they never listened when I told them that, they laughed and shook it off like it was nothing.

"Alice? Alice!" I heard jasper scream as I walked toward them. I began to run toward Alice. Carlisle was there in a matter of seconds. I reached Alice just in time to hear her say one word.

"Victoria." her voice was shaky, and she wasn't paying attention to anything. We all knew what was happening. Except for Sam and them they looked worried.

"Alice, Victoria what? Alice answer me snap out of it!" Edward shouted as he shook her shoulders.

"Stop shaking her!" Jasper snapped. Edward stepped back.

Alice took in a deep raged breath, and came to.

"She's, She's here."

"What do you mean she's here?" Edward asked as he looked around.

"She's on her way. A minute tops. We have no time."

"Is she going to attack?" Alice just shook her head.

I looked around at the pack they were all shaking.

"No, don't, it will just provoke her more" Alice said as she watched in horror.

Sam looked around, they all started to stop shaking.

We all lifted our heads at the sudden sound of a loud evil menace laugh.


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N: that's for all the alerts+ and reviews.. **

**Thanks again to angel of sinne for an awesome and super long review!! Check out her story… ****Minutes to Midnight**

**Thanks to ****DFsams321356 and twilightaddict26** **for there continuing reviews!! Sry for the cliffhanger! Lol **

**also **

**Twilightaddict26 updated her story ****Not So Sweet Reunion****.. Chapter 6 is up!! Read it! **

**Chapter 18: Victoria**

**EDWARDS POV**

I grabbed Bella by the waist. And pushed her behind me. Emmet was directly behind her. Jasper was helping Alice off her feet. Carlisle and Sam were at the front. Esme and Rose were directly behind them. The rest of the pack was shifting themselves so we were all surrounding Bella. Jacob was directly next to me. At this moment in time I was glad Bella was friends with him. He had gotten his entire pack to help me. Help my family protect her. Sworn enemies, now allies against a greater threat.

Victoria slowly stepped through the clearing. I felt Bella shake involuntarily with fear.

"Tsk tsk, Vampires and werewolves, together? How absurd. Funny really you had to stoop to your enemies for help. Am I that much of a threat?" She let out another menace laugh. "Ah, Bella, Come out come out wherever you are. You can not hide from me forever. It would be easier if you just came willingly then your family and friends here wouldn't have to die. But have it your way." I wanted to rip her head off right there. I heard the thoughts of everyone around me. Most of the wolves were shaking. They were going to attack. They couldn't not now.

"DON'T!" I yelled. They all stopped and glanced my way. "She's not alone. don't do it." Jasper sent out a wave of calm.

"Ah little Edward I presume. Your right, I have some friends with me, I am not alone. I have some allies of my own. You couldn't honestly think I would go against your family alone. Although now its not just your family I'm up against. What a pity. Both Cullen's and you mongrels will have to die now."

"NO!" Bella screamed. I turned around and grabbed her.

"Don't she's trying to get a rise out of us. Stop"

"Edward I cant let any of you. I wont!"

"We wont Bella, but you have to stop. don't do this. don't walk away from me now." I looked down into her eyes. Tears will falling down her face. I wiped them away before returning my gaze to Victoria.

"Ah dearest Bella. Afraid for you friends are we. Give yourself to me, and they wont get hurt. I will leave them alone. All I want is you."

Bella took a step around me I grabbed her by the arm and held her. She wiggled and tried pulled herself from my grasp. Jacob grabbed her other arm and held her with me. She was still fighting us. Jasper tried to calm her down but it wasn't working. She was fighting with us, fighting us to let her go to Victoria.

"Bella, STOP!" Jacob shouted. "Think of Charlie. Think of, " he paused I looked at him. "Think of Edward." She stopped and turned toward me. I was almost sure I felt wetness on my cheeks. She struggled from Jacobs grasp and collapsed in my arms, sobbing.

"Dear girl, don't cry I wont hurt you. That much." I snarled at her. She was taunting Bella. Leaving her with only one choice.

"She will never go with you!"

"And we wont let you get her!" Jacob added to my threat.

"Ah the hard way. I love the hard way, its so much more fun! For me anyway. It will only cause you death and pain. Bella I am giving you one last chance! Come with me and they live. Put up a fight, they all die!"

**BELLAS POV**

Not much of a choice. Go easily to my own death. Or risk the lives of everyone here. I knew even if I chose to go with her. Edward and Jake would never let me go.

I felt Edward tighten his hold on me. Jacob looked at me with pleading eyes. I put my hand down at my side and reached for Jakes. I squeezed his hand in mine. I wasn't going any where, not from a lack of trying anyway.

"She's not going anywhere!" Carlisle stated.

"Leave this place now, and never return and we wont have to kill you!" Sam shot.

"HA, mongrel! I will not be the one to die." she laughed again, it sent chills down my spine. "The hard way It is." She whistled. We all looked around confused.

A pale man with blonde hair stepped through into the clearing behind Victoria. Along with a dark shaggy haired man. Another glimpse and I saw the blonde one had scares on his left cheek. It sort of looked like Emily's. everyone around me wrinkled there nose in disgust. I looked up at Edward and Jacob. Both had a look of fear in there eyes, fear I had never seen before. This was much more than fear. They were terrified. But why.

"What's going on?" I whispered.

"Bella, Bella, Bella, I have allies of my own. You should have chosen the easy way. MARCUS, MICHAEL!" she yelled. I looked up. Where the blonde was standing there was now a huge white wolf, with a silver strip down his back. The other was a dark black. I had never seen anything quit like the white wolf. He was big, much bigger than Jacob. Probably even bigger than Sam. Edward had be pushed behind him in the blink of an eye. Everyone surrounding me moved closer toward me. Protecting me in a circle. I heard Edward whisper no, but it was to late. The entire pack had transformed Edward pulled me out of the way defensively throwing me to the ground and landing over me. Emmet helped us off the ground. I looked in horror as the pack hadn't moved. They had just changed. but Marcus and Michael didn't like the sudden change they were snarling and growling. Slamming there teeth together in defiance.

Edward hissed in Jakes direction, he turned his head slightly his eyes rolled.

"Stupid dog! He could have killed you!"

"He's changed in front of me before Edward its fine!" I snapped. This was not a time to fight amongst ourselves.

I heard Victoria let out another menace laugh.

"You chose the hard way. don't think I am unprepared in the least. You will loose everyone you care about. There deaths will be on your head!" I studied everyone around me. They all had look of fear on there face. Carlisle no longer was holding a sturn look. He looked scared. He was eyeing the other wolves. Marcus and Michael. Rogue wolves. They really were here, and Victoria had them on her side. Danger magnet that was me. This was all my fault.

Victoria looked at me one more time. Edward stepped in front of me. Just as Jacob had stepped toward me. They were both standing in front of me. Jacob in his wolf form, Edward in protective crouch. They were so close I'm sure Edward could feel the warmth coming off of Jacob. I sighed this was the only time they weren't going to fight.

"One last chance Bella. Come with me, and your friends here don't have to meet a very gruesome demise." she said as she glanced at the gigantic wolves standing beside her. I looked at the white wolf. He was larger than Jacob and Sam, not by much. I thought Jacob had grown, he wasn't this big before. The Black wolf was nothing special, except he looked ferocious.

"She will never come with you, and we will not give up so easily." Carlisle insisted.

Sam growled and nodded his gigantic wolf head.

"Have it your way!" she turned and stalked into the woods. The gigantic wolves followed her slowly.

Nobody moved, I think they even stopped breathing, until Edward told everyone it was clear.

"She's out of range, were safe. We couldn't attack her now. There were others. They were hiding in the woods. I don't know how many exactly. It was all a buzz."

I dropped to the ground. I wrapped my arms around my knees and buried my face into my legs. This couldn't be happening.

"Carlisle. Please tell me that white wolf Marcus wasn't the same Marcus you told stories about." Edward asked Carlisle. Almost pleading.

"All the stories I've read about and heard. He fits, silver strip and all." He replied.

"He wasn't even that old. A little older than you." Edward snapped.

"We don't age the same way. We continue to transform, the only time we age is if we don't transform for long periods of time. Or we stop." Jacob told him.

"Great, just great!" Edward yelled as he leaned down and punched the ground beneath him. Leaving a big gaping whole where his fist hit. I jumped. He ran over to me and knelt beside me. He slowly put his arm around me.

"I'm sorry Bella, I didn't mean to scare you. I, this just is. I'm upset. I'm sorry." I smiled up at him. I couldn't find my voice. So I hoped he understood I wasn't scared of him.

"What are we going to do Carlisle?" I heard Alice ask.

"Were going to do what we said we were going to do.. Fight."

"We don't know how many she has or who she has helping her." Sam said as he looked around at his pack.

"I know." I heard Edward say from beside me. I looked up at him.

"Marcus is, the one Carlisle told stories about, I cant be a hundered percent sure, but everything fits, the rogue from over a hundred years ago. Michael, he's new. He was alone no one else was there to tell him what was happening to him. Marcus came across him in the woods and lied to him, to get Michael to side with him."

"How many more are there?" Jacob asked as he to kneeled beside me.

"There's eight different people they all thought about. Only eight. 5 are vampires. The other three I couldn't tell. They didn't think enough about them. As of now, we have those three, plus eight more, I'm willing to bet she had atleast five in the woods surrounding us. Making sure we didn't make a move."

"Alice can you see who or what they are." Carlisle asked Alice. I looked over to her, she closed her eyes to concentrate.

"The rest are vampires. Marcus and Michael are the only Werewolves. Like Edward said. Marcus, is the same Marcus from your stories. They don't plan to attack for at least another week. Maybe longer."

"Can you keep an eye on them. If there plans change, I want to know about it." Carlisle stated as he looked around at all of us. "I think it'd be best if we all go home and rest. We can meet back here tomorrow night." He paused and looked to Alice. She closed her eyes for a second and then nodded. "Tomorrow night will be fine. Same time. We need to get a plan of attack we can not let them get into the town. We will be able to show you how to handle the vampires." Carlisle said as he looked to Sam.

**EDWARS POV**

Sam was skeptical at first. He didn't want to give us to much information that we could use against them. Like we would. Were on the same side. Whatever, let him think what he wants. He was nervous to tell us anything at all. He even looked hesitant. "We can do the same for the wolves. Although these are rogue wolves. They might not fight the same." he decided to would be best to tell us. The more help we had the better.

"Any and all help would be greatly appreciated. Thank you." Carlisle responded and with that Sam walked toward the woods. The rest of the pack following behind him.

"Jacob!" Sam called from the edge of the woods. Jacob stood up and looked down at Bella. I tightened my arm around her waist. He looked toward Sam, and then looked down at Bella again. I wanted to growl, tell him to leave, but I held my tongue.

Bella finally looked up at him and smiled weakly.

"Are you going to be ok? I wont leave if…"

"Jacob now!" Sam called after him cutting him off.

"I'll be there give me five minutes!" Jacob ordered. Sam didn't want anyone out alone. He ordered Quil and Embry to stay behind and wait for Jacob. They stepped out into the edge of the clearing and stood there waiting.

"Jacob we'll protect her, she'll be fine." I promised.

"I know, I trust you with her. Weirdly enough today showed me in some weird twisted way, you love her."

"Its not weird or twisted, I would give my life for her. You may say we are not living creatures but ever since I met Bella I have never felt more alive. With out her I would surely die. Oddly enough tonight has shown me that you also care for Bella. I too trust you." I stated. I sighed. "Don't mistake my trust Jacob. I trust you with her life. I trust you not to let any harm come to her. I do not trust you with her though."

"Edward one mistake that's all I need you to make.'

"Then you will be waiting for eternity my friend. I will not make another mistake again. I will be fighting, much more than you."

"Good I wouldn't want to win because you gave up."

"Don't put her through that Jacob, don't put yourself through that."

"I'll be just fine." And with that he walked toward his friends and they disappeared.

I leaned down and picked Bella up off the ground into my arms. She placed her head on my chest.

"Than you."

"For what my love?"

"For being nice to Jacob even though I know you don't want to. I know he's trying to get me away from you. I heard, one mistake."

"He will never get that mistake Bella."

"I know. But still thank you for being nice."

"Anything for you. But I meant every word I said to him. I trust he has you best interest at heart. No matter how misguided his attempts are." I laughed

"Yea, as if I could love anyone other than you."

"Bella you do love him."

"But its not the love I have for you."

"No, your right its not but still don't cut him short." I smiled at her.

"What are we going to do Edward. There huge, there so much bigger. They can kill all of you!"

"Let em try!" Emmet exclaimed with a grin.

"This is no time to joke. Bella is right on one thing. Marcus is much bigger. He is vicious he has left over a hundred years of destruction in his wake. He suddenly disappeared a little over a hundred years ago, presumably he was killed but now we know different. We need all the help, all the strength and all the advantages we can get. I will not lie. With him against us I am a little worried, but Bella do not be afraid. We will all be ok, we can all take him."

Bella nodded her head. By the look on her face she wasn't convinced.

"She needs sleep Carlisle can I take her home?"

"Yes Edward stay with her, but I want Alice and Emmet to go with you to her house they can come home once your safe inside."

I finally got her home, she didn't make a sound the whole way home.

I placed her gently on the bed.

"Bella. Love say something."

"What do you want me to say?"

"Anything. Tell me what your thinking."

"You wont like it. You don't want to know."

"Tell me anyway, and I always want to know what your thinking.

"I'm thinking that there has to be something more I can do. I can't just sit around and let you all run around fighting rogue wolves, especially Marcus. You heard Carlisle. He's lethal. What if he kills someone? What if he kills you?"

"Bella, keep your voice down, Charlie is sleeping, and Bella he's no match for all of us."

"What if he's not fighting all of you. Or are you forgetting Michael the eight other whatever they are, and Victoria!"

"Bella nothing is going to hurt you, we wont let any of them get anywhere near you."

"I'm not worried about me!" She started sobbing again. I pulled her closer to me, trying to console her. She was shaking and tears were rolling down her face. "I'm worried about everyone else, and. You! What if something happens you Edward? I couldn't live without you, I cant handle loosing you again. You cant do that to me!" her words cut me like a knife. The images I had seen in Jacobs memory came rushing back, ripping my heart open. I had done that to her. What if something did happen to me. How could I put her through that pain again. But we cant just leave, Victoria would just kill everyone else we left behind. Everyone we cared about.

"I wont let anything happen to either of us. I cant live without you either Bella."

"Edward, how can you be sure? You cant know that you'll be ok."

"But I do, Alice would see."

"If there is werewolves involved she cant see anymore!"

"But Victoria doesn't trust them enough to stay with them. She leaves them in the woods or somewhere, and goes to where she's hiding. If she didn't Alice wouldn't be able to see what she plans. But she does, she sees them she sees Victoria ordering the eight other vampires. Its when they join the Werewolves she cant see. Until then we know what she's planning. So far she plans to attack in a week and two days. The wolves aren't with her."

"But Edward, when they are with her she'll be blind. We all will!"

"But at least we know when to expect her. We'll be ready for her. Now get some sleep my love. Please. Tomorrow I have a surprise for you to take your mind off of all of this."

"I don't like surprises." She frowned. It made me laugh she was so beautiful. I knew she would love my surprise and I didn't want to ruin it for her. It was Saturday so I had the entire day to carry out my plan.

"Bella, Alice has already told me that your going to love it."

"You tell Alice but you don't tell me?" she pouted. It made me laugh even more.

"Bella its time to go to bed, its been another long night."

I grabbed Bella and pulled her back to lay onto the bed. I wrapped my arms around her and hummed her lullaby. She leaned up searching, I couldn't resist. I gave her what she wanted. I kissed her gently, bringing my cool lips to hers.


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N: that's for all the alerts+ and reviews.. **

**Thanks yet again to angel of sinne for another awesome and super long review!! She so rocks!! Lol**

**Check out her story… ****Minutes to Midnight**

**Thanks to ****twilightaddict26** **for her continuing reviews!! **

**also **

**Twilightaddict26 updated her story ****Not So Sweet Reunion****.. Chapter 6 is up!! Read it! **

**Chapter 19: Surprise**

**BELLAS POV**

I woke up and the sun was shinning through my window. I let out a low yawn, and sighed. I pushed my self up hoping the last night was just a dream. I saw Edward passing across my room. He was on the phone with some one. He seemed agitated. I watched him closely as he passed back and forth not even realizing I was awake.

He slammed the phone shut and sighed.

"Oh, Bella. I'm sorry. Are you ready for today?"

"What was that about?"

"What was what about?"

"Edward."

"Bella."

"Tell me, no secrets!" I reminded him.

"Ok." He sighed before continuing. "That was Alice. It seems Victoria is impatient." He must have seen the fear in my eyes. He was next to me in a second with his arm around me. "Bella, its nothing like that. We still have a week."

"She made it sooner?"

He nodded "By two days." he sighed. "Things are ahead of schedule."

"What things?"

"She's planning an attack. She doesn't know we know about it before hand. She's also teaching the eight other vampires about werewolves. Most don't know much about them." He didn't look at me. Werewolves. They were going to be experts on werewolves.

"Jacob!" I exclaimed suddenly. "They are going to know exactly how to take the entire pack out!"

"Bella, it will be ok. Were going to tell the pack how to fight against vampires, they wont really need our help, that's what they were made for. Destroying us, its all they know."

"But…" I tried to object but he wouldn't let me.

"Bella don't. not today. Please just let this be about your surprise. About us, me and you. Nothing else. Please." I wanted that, but I couldn't just ignore the twinge of guilt I felt in the pit of my stomach. Some one could die. One of the people I cared about could be taken from me, and it would all be my fault. It would be on my shoulders. Could I live with myself if one of the pack died? If Sam, Embry, Quil, I shuddered at the last, Jacob. It wasn't even just the pack, the Cullen's would be in the fight to, against a vicious vampire killer. I looked up at Edward, he was still waiting for my response. Waiting for me to tell him nothing but us.

"Nothing else matters." I lied. I'm pretty sure he saw right through it. But he said nothing. "Where's Charlie?"

"Fishing with Billy. Jacobs dad is doing his job, he is keeping Charlie none the wiser."

"What are we going to do when they plan to attack?"

"We are going to get you as far away as possible." I was stunned I looked at him, shock written all over my face. He wanted to get rid of me. There was no way I was going anywhere when everything and everyone I care about was going to be in serious danger. No way!

"I don't think so!" I said forcefully

"What? Bella, you don't actually think I would let you stay here? Bella, not that it's going to happen, but just in case. I am not letting her get to you. Billy will already have Charlie safe and sound. I will not let them get through but if one slips by, you will not be waiting for them."

"Edward! I am not staying in hiding."

"Bella. Please be reasonable."

"Edward this isn't fair!"

"We can decide what to do and what's fair when we meet the wolves tonight in the clearing."

"Fine!" I sighed and got up to get dressed.

I grabbed my clothes for the day and headed for the door.

"Where do you think your going?" Edward asked innocently

"What do you mean?" I was skeptical. He had a mischievous look in his eye. It mad me nervous. I smiled weakly trying to cover it.

"Nothing." His face suddenly blank.

"Fine." I rolled my eyes "I'll be back, I'm going to jump in the shower real quick." He nodded and smiled. I turned toward the door, and decided against it. I turned full force and ran and leaped into Edwards lap. I kissed him patiently, tracing his arm with my finger tips. Hm he wanted to tease me with stupid nonsense questions, I could tease him. In a completely different way, but still the same. I laughed as I pulled away gently. He smiled his crooked smile at me. God how I loved that smile.

"Shower time. I'll be back." I stated. I grinned and started toward the door.

His face dropped, his lips turned into a pout. It made me laugh even more.

"I can tease just as easily as you can. Only I can do it better." I walked out shutting the door behind me.

**EDWARDS POV**

She had a point, she could tease me like no other. How I wanted to pull her back onto my lap, and never let her go. Thoughts crept into my head. She was in the shower. I pushed the thoughts out of my head again. I had made a mistake, I had almost slipped up. I wouldn't allow myself to do that again.

She was almost asking for it, asking me to give in. No, I couldn't, it went fine the first time, but who's to say I have that self control for a second time? I couldn't risk it. Could I? No, that was crazy. I would not risk Bella's life. But we had done it before, everything was fine. She had not been hurt. My self control diminished on some things, but remained strong for others. I sat there debating for what felt like hours. Even though I knew it only to be a few minutes. I had my answer. I knew what I was willing to risk, and what I was willing to do. But would Bella approve?

**BELLAS POV**

I stood in the bathroom looking in the mirror. I was nothing special, so why did all this crap always happen to me? Danger magnet that's what I was called. But this danger was different, it wasn't danger for me. It was danger for everyone I cared about. Everyone I loved was in danger. In danger because of me. I could do nothing to stop it. If I tried Alice would see and send someone to stop me. Then they would all be mad. Trust them, they say. How can I trust them, they don't know what's going to happen. Not even Alice could tell the future, werewolves were involved. It made her visions useless. She didn't see what was going to happen if they were around. They aren't around Victoria right now, but that could change. We were flying blind, no matter what anyone else wanted to say, we were blind. We were in trouble. Victoria wanted blood, her werewolves, and probably even the vampires were strong, strong and lethal. The numbers were on our side. They were out numbered. I just hoped that would be enough. Enough to get us through this, enough to get everyone through this, unharmed.

I sighed and unwrapped the towel from my body. I opened the curtain, and turned on the water. I was only in the shower for a few minutes and the steam already filled the bathroom. I soaked the warmth in. I let the water hit my back, as I thought on what tonight might be like. What would happen. Sam and Carlisle had agreed to help each other. Show each other the other there weakness. Pure enemies, now allied because of Victoria and her lethal friends. I hoped this common ground, and understanding between the Cullen's and the pack would continue even after Victoria, but I knew that was wishful thinking. Edward had said pure enemies, and that was a strong thing to get around.

I closed my eyes and leaned my head against the wall.

I heard someone cough. I lifted my head abruptly to see Edward poke his head around the curtain. I jumped and wrapped my arms around myself.

"What's wrong?" he laughed. He could be so annoying. What's wrong, that's funny I'm in the shower and he comes waltzing into the bathroom like its nothing.

"I don't know. I'm in the shower maybe!" I blurted. He laughed again.

"Your point being?" He grinned, as he stepped inside the shower, and closed the curtains.

I let out a low gasp, as I saw his bare body glisten from the water. He was this magnificent, beautiful creature standing before me, and there I was plain and ordinary holding my arms around myself trying to hide what ever I could. How do I compare to him. He was beautiful, god like, and then there was me. Plain, ordinary, un attractive.

"Bella." he whispered as he stepped closer to me, grabbing my hands in his and pulling them away from my body. "What are you doing?"

I gulped. "What, what do you mean?" I stuttered, I was nervous. This was defiantly something he didn't allow, but then again. I guess all those rules went out the window with my virginity, and his.

"Don't hide yourself, your beautiful."

"I don't know about that." I said coolly. He just grinned and brought my hand up to his lips. He slowly traced his perfect hard, cold lips up my arm, around my shoulder. He stopped at my neck, he began to nibble gently. I tried to suppress a low moan. His lips felt amazing, against my skin. I heard him pull in a raged breath. I started kissing along his jaw line, just as he had done to me so many times before. I felt his hand tighten on my arm slightly and smiled.

He pulled me closer to him and brought his lip to mine. It was a deep and passionate kiss, similar to the ones we had shared the other night when we finally made love for the first time. He was still being careful, but not nearly as careful as before. I felt him push his tongue into my mouth and I parted my lips more for him. He kissed me more forcefully. It slightly reminded me of a kiss so long ago. When it felt like we didn't have much time left. I pushed that thought from my mind. I knew I should have been worried about that, but for some reason I just didn't care. He ran his tongue across my teeth and explored the inside of my mouth. Finally, he pulled back and began to kiss my jaw line and neck, teasing me like I had him. Then worked his way across my shoulders and down my arms and back up again. He made his way back up to my lips and kissed me again, while staring into my eyes. I saw nothing but love, passion, and desire in his beautiful topaz eyes. I blinked away the water that had ran over my face and eyes.

He slowly wrapped his hands around my face and tilted my head up so he could have better access to my neck. He slowly let his hands fall to my shoulders. He began to run his fingers up and down my arms tracing his lips down my neck to my chest. He paused slightly, and began to kiss the top of my breast. His hands slowly made there way to my side and down to my waist.

He wrapped his hands around my waist and hoisted me up with no effort. I took in a low gasp at his sudden movement, but then wrapped my legs around his waist as he gently pushed my back against the wall. He had his one hand around my thigh holding me up. His other hand around my cheek. I ran my hands along his chest, taking in his perfect god like form.

"MM you look amazing." he whispered as he kissed my neck again. I laughed I was wet and in a shower, I probably looked like a drown rat.

"If you say so, you are the amazing one." I lightly pulled me away from the wall, holding my entire weight. Both his hands were on my thigh and butt. He slowly lifted his one hand, and gently traced up my back.

He pulled away from kissing my neck and stared into my eyes, before smiling at me and kissing me again. He maneuvered me down, allowing himself better access. He leaned my back up against the wall of the shower again and slowly entered inside of me. He stared into my eyes the entire time, looking for any sign of pain or hesitance. I showed none, I wanted this, more than, almost, anything.

We continued to kiss passionately, with Edward constantly rubbing his tongue around the inside of my mouth. As the lust built up, I started to move my hips so that he knew I was ready. I heard him moan. I moved my hips a little more forceful, and I heard his gently purr. He pulled away and looked into my eyes.

"You feel amazing, Bella. I love you so much. You are all I want and need. For forever." He told me, as he continued to stare into my eyes and thrust a little faster. I knew he was using an extreme amount of self control, but as long as he was willing to keep trying I wouldn't complain. He slowed, letting the pleasure build over a longer period of time. It felt amazing, though, and I could tell how great it felt for him too. The hot water of the shower only heightened our senses, and eventually I felt the final surge of pleasure run through both our bodies. Gasping for air, I pulled myself as tight to him as I could. He continued to kiss my neck, running his tongue and lips all over it.

I hugged myself to him, pulling my back away from the wall. I knew he would be able to support my weight. I stayed in his arms for a while longer, waiting for my racing heartbeat to slow down. As he finally pulled himself out of me, we both moaned slightly simultaneously.

I finally was able to stand, and slid out of his arms. I turned off the water and we got out of the shower and dried off. Edward picked me up, wrapped in the towel, and walked out of the bathroom into the hall toward my room. He placed me gently on my bed.

"Mm that was, that was an amazing surprise." I stated with a grin. I knew that wasn't the surprise he had intended but It was a surprise just he same.

"Silly beautiful, Bella. Your surprise hasn't even came yet. You have a long great day ahead of you."

"I get no hint at all?"

"None, but I will agree, that, was, an unexpected but welcomed surprise." He smiled and kissed my neck gently. "We should however get dressed and ready."

I groaned I didn't want to move. But slowly I got to my feet again and walked over to get my clothes. I walked toward the door, and Edward was in front of me in a second blocking my path.

"Where do you think your going?" he asked, still wrapped in a towel. His chest and abs still glistening and bare. I smirked.

"To change."

"Bella, my love. Why must you leave the room to do so?"

"I, uh." Was all I could get out.

"I have seen your beautiful bare body before. I mean we are both in towels after having a nice hot shower." He grinned.

"I guess you have a point. I said as I put my clothes on top of my dresser. I turned back around to look at him. I smirked, as I leaned toward him and kissed his lips gently. I slowly moved my hands to his waist, and grabbed the corner of the towel in my hand and yanked it off. He pulled away abruptly, as I smirked again.

The next second he was sitting on my bed with the blanket over top of him.

"That was, not fair Bella."

"Fair, I think it was completely fair." I said as I ran and hopped onto the bed beside him.

"Bella, we should get dressed, I don't think my self control, could handle a second round." He smiled his crooked smile. I just rolled my eyes and kissed him lightly as I stood up and got dressed.

We drove in silence, after I had continually asked Edward about my surprise he decided after he answered and I repeated myself he ignored me. I sat in the passenger side of his Volvo and pouted.

"Bella, stop pouting, you know I want to surprise you, so stop asking. Please, don't make me ruin this for you."

"Humph fine." he grabbed my hand in his and kissed it gently. He finally pulled his car off to the side of the road.

"Where are we?"

"Somewhere. Close you eyes." he said as he opened my door and helped me out.

"But, where are we?"

"Uh Bella, the hard way it is." he grabbed me around my waist with one arm, and slowly slid a blindfold over my eyes.

"Edward!" I screeched.

"Bella, nothing will happen to you." He promised, and next thing I knew he had me wrapped in his arms the air was rushing through my hair. He was running, top speed.

We finally came to a stop. He gently placed me on my feet.

I pulled the blindfold of my face and smiled at him.

"Where are we?" I asked again as I looked around. We were in the woods. But it didn't look familiar, then again, if I had been here before I doubt id remember, trees all looked the same to me.

"You'll see." He grabbed my hand and lead me through the trees.

We emerged after a few minutes into the most beautiful place I had ever seen.

Our meadow. There was a a table with two chairs directly in the center, and a big comfy blanket next to it., with a basket. Flowers were surrounding the blanket. There was a big bouquet of roses laying in the center of the blanket. We finally reached the blanket and Edward scooped me up into his arms and placed me gently on one of the chairs. He grabbed the basket, and placed it next to the table.

"Edward, what is all this? How did you?"

"I had a little help." He smirked.

"Alice?"

"Of course. She always out does her self." He grinned.

"Yes, she does. But what is all this for?"

"Do I have to have a reason?"

"It's you, there's always a reason for everything you do."

"True, but almost always the reasons the same. I love you."

I smiled at him, as he opened the basket and pulled out a bowl of strawberries.

He pulled one out hand put it up to my mouth. I took a bite, and smiled, as I picked one up and brought it to his mouth. We both laughed at the gesture.

"I wish I could taste them." He said coolly.

"What else do you have in your basket full of goodies?" I beamed.

"Patience my love."

He slowly pulled out a small chocolate cake. I looked at him skeptical. Why would he pack all this food. When he cant eat any.

"What's that for?" I smiled weakly.

"I made it myself." my face brightened.

"You made it? You made me a cake?" I smiled from ear to ear as I leaned toward him and kissed him gently. "What's the occasion?"

"I love you, isn't that occasion enough?"

"I suppose so." he cut me a piece of the cake, and placed it on plate as he handed it to me.

It tasted amazing. He was good at everything.

"Is there anything you don't excel at?" he just laughed.

"I guess we'll find out." He smiled, but he looked nervous. The smile didn't meet his eyes. "Bella, there was an ulterior motive to me bringing you here."

"What?" I asked hesitantly.

"You have already agreed to marry me."

"Yes, of course." I didn't know where this was going.

"Well, what if we made it more, more permanent." he smiled, that time it met his eyes.

"What do you mean more permanent? Can it get more permanent?" I laughed.

"Yes, but I don't know how much your going to like it."

"Edward, tell me." He smiled that crooked smile that made me weak.

He slowly stood up from his chair and came over to me. He smiled down at me. I looked at him confused.. He grabbed my hands and pulled me up and kissed me gently. He bent down and pulled out a CD player from the basket and placed it on the table. He pushed some buttons and then I slightly heard my lullaby start to play. I smiled brightly at him.

I was beginning to get nervous, and then he did something I didn't think id ever see, at least not this soon in my life.

He bent down and kneeled on one knee. My face dropped. Was he serious? No we, were to young. I, oh my god. Was all I could think.

"Bella, you know how much I care about you, and how much I want to spend forever, eternity with you. I promise I will change you, and we can be together for forever. I love you with all of my being. You are the reason for my existence. Isabella, I always thought I was complete, and that I didn't need anything else. Or anyone else. But then I met you, and you turned everything upside down. Literally. I was always saving you, protecting you, and I think deep down I always knew why, even though I didn't want to admit it. I was completely in love with you from the first time I smelt you in class. I almost killed you but I resisted, and then suddenly, I hated to be away from you, but it was also hard to be with you. I love you, and I will always love you. I promise to be there for you, no matter what. I promise to only leave your side when absolutely required and necessary. I promise to give you everything you want, everything I can give you. I love you Bella. And I want to do this right, I want to do things with you as right as they can be…" He saw the tears start to fall slowly down my face and reached over to wipe them away for me. "So.." he said as he slowly reached into his pocket and pulled out a little black box. I was shocked. He couldn't be serious. We were way to young, we were still in school, he couldn't be serious, I know he asked me to marry him and I agreed but this, this was to much. My mouth opened. "Bella Marie Swan. Be with me for forever, for eternity. Marry me."

**A/N: Hmmm people have told me in reviews that I should start putting a limit of reviews I need to get before I update.. I don't know If I should.. Cuz then that's not fair to the people who do review.. Hmmmm lemme kno whatcha think..**


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N: that's for all the alerts+ and reviews.. **

**Thanks yet again to angel of sinne for another awesome and super long review!! She so rocks!! Lol... She thinks I should change my summary to get more people to read and review.. What do you all think!? **

**Also check out her story… ****Minutes to Midnight**** its really good!**

**Thanks to ****twilightaddict26 and DFsams321356 for there continuing reviews!! **

**also **

**Twilightaddict26 updated her story ****Not So Sweet Reunion****.. Chapter 6 is up!! Read it! Read it now!! **

**Chapter 20: Truly Wonderful**

**EDWARDS POV**

Bella's mouth was open in shock. It scared me a little. I waited patiently for what felt like hours before she finally spoke.

"Edward, I, you, were to young, were still in school. I mean…" I cut her off.

"Bella, you already said yes, were technically already engaged, I was just making it more official. I mean. don't you want to marry me?" I don't know if I was more shocked or hurt at her reaction to the ring. I know she didn't like anyone spending money on her especially me, but I mean. "Bella if it's the ring, I didn't spend a dime, I promise. It was my mothers, my father gave it to her. I figured.." This time she cut me off.

"Edward, its not that, of course I want to marry you, don't be stupid. But I mean I cant go wearing that all over town."

"Why not who cares what others think. All that matters is us."

"Yes, I know, but. Charlie, what would he say?"

"Bella I love you, I want to marry you. I want to make it official. I want the entire world to know how in love we are."

"Edward, I love you too."

"Then except it, if you want you can tell people it's a promise ring. A promise that I will love you for eternity, that I will be with you for eternity. A promise that someday soon I will have you as my wife." I was nervous now, what if she didn't except I mean I understood her point. People would think we were insane, we were to young, but who cares.

"Edward." she smiled. "Of course." she sighed. "I already said yes!" She beamed.

"Is that a yes to the ring as well?" I grinned as I slid the ring on her finger. "You have just made me the happiest person, the happiest creature alive."

"I'm glad." she said as she wiggled her fingers in the sun watching the ring glisten and sparkle. "I don't think I can tell Charlie right away though, so when I go home."

"Don't you dare take it off." I cut her off.

"I wasn't going to, I will simple turn it, so only the silver band is showing." She smiled up at me. I saw only love in her eyes.

"Care to dance my love?" I took her hand in mine and leaned to turn the volume up.

We glided as one all around the meadow. Dancing to the CD I had made Bella. Her feet on top of mine. She was still a klutz. But I loved her and her clumsiness. She laughed as I twirled her and pulled her closer to me. I kissed the top of her head, and continued down the side of her face. Finally pausing in front her I looked into her deep eyes, I almost lost myself. I smiled the crooked smile I knew she loved. I gently kissed her on her warm soft lips.

"So If I touch you are you going to run into the shadows?" she asked jokingly. I laughed at her.

"No I don't think so." I smiled as I spun us closer and closer to the blanket swaying with the music. I got to the edge of the blanket and she smiled up at me.

"So no running?" She asked again with a grin. As she locked her hands behind my neck.

"Never." I promised.

"Good." she said and suddenly she was in the air.

**BELLAS POV**

I jumped up into the air. Of course, he caught me. I expected him to, he would never let me all. He laughed and stumbled backward. I laughed at him as he lightly tripped over the edge of the blanket and fell backwards. He was on his back on the blanket. We both laughed. I was straddling him. I tightly squeezed his waist with my legs and kissed his neck. I worked my way up to his ear and began to nibble. His breathing stopped for a moment before he pulled me closer to him and began to kiss my neck.

I was still on top of him as I began to unbutton his shirt. I kissed his neck gently and began to trace my lips down his neck to his bare sparkling chest.

"Bella." He moaned. It made me want him even more. I kissed him all over his chest and abs. I paused slightly at his hip, and nibbled on his hip and lightly sucked. I felt his stomach tense and tighten.

I slowly reached for the button on his pants. I lifted his head slightly and looked at me. I raised my eyebrows at him and smiled a devious smile. He tried to smile, but his face was confused. He really had no idea what I planned to do. I didn't really know either, but I was going to try. I gently tugged his jeans down and around his ankles. I felt his cool hands grab the top of my shoulders as he pulled me up toward him. I felt him kick his jeans off.

He wrapped his arms around my back and rolled me over. I pushed on his chest trying to roll him onto his back. I wasn't going to give up that easily. I slowly slid my hands in under his unbuttoned shirt. Ripping it from his arms and tossing it to the ground.

"Well this hardly seems fair Bella, my love."

"What's not fair?" I smiled up at him.

"You my love, are completely clothed, and here I am." I cut him off.

"Not completely clothed." I laughed.

"Exactly. Not fair in deed." he grinned a devilish smile, and gently slid his hands up the end of my shirt. He ran his finger tips along my stomach. I felt it tense and tighten has his had done. He kissed my neck gently. He then slid his hands further up my shirt pulling it away from my waist. He lightly kissed my stomach. If it didn't tighten before it surely was now. He lifted his head and began to blow on my stomach around my belly button. I moaned slightly and at that he began to kiss his way up my stomach pulling my shirt up ever so slightly. Soon I was hoisted into a sitting position and my shirt was no longer on my body. I grinned at him as I gently climbed onto his lap and pushed his back against the blanket. I kissed my way down his chest, abs all the way to his waist. I froze there. I drug my nails down his sides, all the way to his knees, and then gently traced my fingers up his legs, and lightly grabbed the edge of his boxers and pulled them down. I kissed his hips, and slowly worked my way further down. His head bolted up suddenly. I ignored it.

Slowly and carefully, I reached for his manhood. His hand stopped me. I looked up in surprise; my sudden confidence boost vanished and was replaced by doubt. The thought however quickly diminished as Edward rolled me swiftly onto my back. I was confused but I wasn't going to argue, he was still letting this continue, I would try again another time them.

I looked up at him. His smile was no smile, it was a smirk. His eyes were narrowed, as if he was contemplating something. I began to wonder what he was about to do to me.

"You can do that later, Bella," his face lowered itself down to mine. He grinned as he lightly kissed my lips. He slowly began to kiss my neck, my shoulders, my chest, he paused at my breast as he reached around and unsnapped my bra, and threw it to the side. He traced his fingers up around my sides to my breast. He blew lightly on my nipples. I let out a low moan. He kissed each of them gently and continued his way down, he unbuttoned my jeans and they to were thrown to the side along with my panties. Talk about fair.

"Edward." I sighed, as I grabbed the elastic of his boxers and ripped them free of his legs. I gently rolled him to the side and climbed on top of him. I kissed his neck, and found my way to his cool lips. He smiled up at me lovingly. I lightly kissed his neck and kissed my way down to his waist once again. I was so close. I grabbed his man hood in my hand and gently began to massage it. I lightly licked the top.

"Bella." he groaned as he grabbed my shoulders and once again pulled me up to him. I sighed. "Bella, I doubt I have enough self control for that." he stated blankly as he smiled at me. He saw disappointment in my eyes. He gently rolled me over onto my back. "Don't you dare think I do not want you, and every part of you. But until such a time that you are not so fragile, we should wait. I don't think I would be able to have any self control left." He smiled down at me and began to kiss me patiently. I felt him enter inside me. I moaned at my satisfaction. I felt his hips move to the rhythm as he thrust himself in further, deeper. I moaned loudly. To loud.

Edward pulled out of me, and I groaned in protest. Edward, however, wasn't going to have that. Before I had even finished the groan, he had locked his lips around mine. His tongue glided along my lips, begging for entrance. I wasn't going to complain. I opened my lips and his cool breath entered my mouth. I moaned again out of pleasure,

"Oh God, Edward…" I panted. He entered me once again.

"Bella." he whispered in my ear. I let out another low moan as I traced my fingers along his back and around to his stomach. I kissed his neck.

**EDWARDS POV**

She was kissing me, her hands moving all over me, gripping me close. Every part of her body was touching every part of mine and it was like everything I'd always wanted only so much better…

I took her face between my hands, gently. For a second, I looked in her eyes. I couldn't see anything there but a love that warmed my heart and set me on fire, both sweet and passionate, like the kiss that followed it.

She swayed her hips side to side, I moaned. She felt amazing.

I gently nibbled on her neck, careful not to break the skin as I felt us both climax. We moaned simultaneously as one.

"Edward!" Bella moaned again as I continued to suck on her neck. "Do it. Now. Change me!" She moaned. It startled me I sat up abruptly and pulled away from her. Was she insane?

"Bella. Be reasonable." I spat, and then I saw the hurt in her eyes. "Bella, love I mean seriously. We have more important things to worry about than you being damned forever."

"Edward. If I was changed, Victoria would no longer be after me."

"You don't know that she would just give up, she could come after everyone else. Or even you. She has werewolves Bella, there isn't enough time to even get you ready enough to fight with us let alone to be able to resist the blood lust. Please understand, I will change you. Soon. Just not now."

She pouted at me as I laid back down beside her.

"Guess I totally ruined the moment huh?" she asked sadly. I could hear the disappointment in her voice. I didn't like to deny her of anything, but this was simple un avoidable. Even if I did change her, there would be no time for her to build up a tolerance to the blood. And there would defiantly be no time to teach her what she needed to know to survive against an attack.

"No, but Bella, please understand. I don't want to deny you of anything but there simple isn't enough time to get you ready."

"Edward, I just don't want to be sent away. Please don't send me away. I wouldn't survive. It would feel like it had a year ago when you left me. Please don't make me go through that again." I saw the sadness and hurt in her eyes. The pain I had caused her a year ago, still buried deep within her, ready to strike its ugly head at any moment.

"Bella, my love. I will never leave you again!" I promised.

"But your going to send me away from you! Away from everyone I are about."

"Bella. Its for your own safety its just a precaution."

"Please Edward, don't send me away I couldn't bare it. I couldn't bare the thought of being away from everyone I care about. Being away from you while your fighting her. I will go mad at not knowing."

"Bella. I." I sighed, I couldn't put her through that pain again. "Ok, we will figure something else out for you tonight with the others."

"Promise you wont send me away, promise me."

"I promise Bella, one way or another I will make you safe without sending you away. But you will not be anywhere near the fight. I can not have you there. It would be to dangerous for you."

"Edward."

"Bella, that is my final offer, a compromise. I will not send you away, but I will not have you there at the fight."

"Fine. But there has to be a way I can know what is going on at the fight. I couldn't bare it if something happen to any of you. Ill go mad not knowing if were winning."

"We will win, we will beat her, and you will be safe. Everyone will come home to you." I promised her. I knew I couldn't actually keep that promise, I didn't know if anyone let alone me would come home to her. She knew that I could tell by the look on her face she knew it was an empty promise. A promise I couldn't keep.

"Edward don't promise me something you cant keep. You know as much as I do. Therefore you do not know who will come back to me."

"I'm sorry Bella, I wish we didn't have to do this, I wish there was another way." I wrapped my arms around her tightly.

We laid on the blanket soaking up the sun for what felt like forever. The talk about the fight was over. Now we talked about our wedding, what we wanted, what we liked. We both knew we had no say, it would all be on Alice. As she wanted it, we both trusted her to do it. We knew she would make it something that was unforgettable. Something that we both would love. We tried to guess what she had planned. What colors she had in mind.

I heard Bella's stomach growl.

"Hungry my love?" I hopped up and opened my 'basket full of goodies' as she so put it. I pulled out the small cooler, and handed her a sandwich.

We were both almost fully dressed. She was wearing my shirt, it was partly buttoned. My chest was bare. Every so often I would catch her smiling at me, as I sparkled in the sunlight.

"How's your sandwich?" I asked as I smiled at her.

"Good, did you make this to?" She smirked.

"Actually yes, it was so hard, grab some meat and some bread and cheese. The hardest thing I ever did." I joked.

"Funny! But I would like some more cake. It was amazing." She smiled as she reached for the basket.

"Ah ah ah" I said as I reached into the basket and pulled out the cake. I cut her another piece and put it on a plate for her.

She smiled as she took a bite of it. I saw her eyes dart from the cake to my face. I didn't like the look she had. It was a mischievous look. She grinned as she took another bit.

I looked at her and frowned. I was puzzled what was she planning. Suddenly before I could even think to move. I had a chunk of chocolate cake hit me dead center of my forehead. She laughed as she stood up and ran.

"Bella, that was, very, rude." she just laughed at me again as she turned to look at me. She saw my face and laughed even harder. "Big mistake." I grabbed a chunk of the cake in my hand and ran toward her. She squealed as she took off running again. I threw a piece of the cake toward her. She ducked just in time. I finally reached her. Not using my full speed, and wrapped my arm around her waist and smeared the chunk of cake I had on her cheek. She laughed and tried to pull away from me. She grabbed the hand that had cake all over and pulled it up to her face. She went to kiss my hand but quickly changed direction. She had smeared me with cake with my own hand. I was stunned and let her go. She ran toward the table and I turned around just in time to have a chunk of cake hit me in the arm.

"Big mistake huh?" she asked as she threw another piece. I ducked and walked forward toward her. She threw another piece, I ducked easily out of the way.

She turned around toward the table and grabbed more cake in both her hands. I decided this would be a perfect time to use my full speed. She turned around expecting me to be further away. I was standing directly behind her. She screamed in reaction to how close I was. I laughed. She tried to bring her hands up to my face to smear me with cake. I pulled my face away and grabbed her wrist. She wiggled and squirmed trying to break free. I laughed at her as she struggled. She pouted, and suddenly my face was hit with cake. She shook her hands and it hit me smack on the face.

"Oh." I groaned. "Not fair."

"I never said I'd play fair." she smirked.

"Hm neither did I." and with that I grabbed her by her waist with my one arm and grabbed the cake with the other.

"Edward. don't you dare." she whined

"Ahh but I thought we weren't playing fair."

She pouted. I sighed and began to place the cake back on the table when she broke free of my grasp and ran.

"What happen to fair?" I shouted as I grabbed the cake once again and took off after her.

I threw a piece at her and she ducked. My clumsy Bella I thought as she slid to the ground.

I ran to her side making sure she was ok,. she was laughing. I kneeled down behind her.

"Boo." she turned her head to look at me. She pushed my shoulders and I tumbled backward trying to catch myself. She smeared me yet again with more cake. I took the rest of the cake I had in my hand and smeared her face, and down her chest.

She yelled again as she shook her hair out of her face.

We were both sitting on the ground laughing at each other. Cake was everywhere. It was all over her face, her hair and down her chest, she had it on her jeans. I looked down at myself I felt the cake all over my face, it was in my hair no doubt. I had cake all up and down my arms.

It was everywhere. We laughed again.

"So I think I win." I stated.

"How do you figure?"

"Well I am most certainly more clean than you are. You have cake everywhere."

"Ha you do to!" She glared jokingly.

"Yes but you have more." I smiled at her.

"UH" she said as she pushed my shoulders back, and gently jumped into my lap. She wiped her entire body all over mine and laughed. She rubbed cheek against mine, smearing the cake even worse.

"Now were even." she smiled at me. I kissed her patiently on her lips. I felt cake in my mouth. I slightly wished I could actually taste it, but decided Bella's taste was better as I gently kissed her lips again.

"Bella, its getting late." I stated as I looked up and saw the sun was beginning to set.

"No, cant we stay a little longer. Watch the sun set?" she asked in a frown.

"I suppose getting you home just a little bit later wont matter much." I smiled brightly up at her as I pulled her closer to me on my lap. I held her close as we watched the sun set. She laid her head against my shoulder.

"I love you Bella. This was one of the most wonderful days in my eighty odd years."

"MM I love you, and it was truly wonderful." She replied. As she took one last look at her ring as it sparkled in the disappearing sunlight.

**A/N: Hmmm people have told me in reviews that I should start putting a limit of reviews I need to get before I update.. i asked about It in the other review. And I have decided it wouldn't be fair to put a certain number of limit I have to get before I update so far into the story.. But my next story will have some limits.. Not high ones, cuz I still don't think its fair to ppl who do review… so instead for this story I am going to simple ask, the people who read it, to please review. Tell me what you like, what you don't like, what you want to happen, or what you think is going to happen. PLEASE R&R **

**Thank you!: - )**


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N: that's for all the alerts+ and reviews.. **

**Thanks yet again to angel of sinne for another awesome and super long review!! She so rocks!! Lol... She thinks I should change my summary to get more people to read and review.. What do you all think!? Lol... **

**also we both agree. **

**Edward should totally be a real person lol… he has totally given the female population, un attainable expectations of the male race lol… shakes head**

**Also check out her story… ****Minutes to Midnight**** its really good!**

**Twilightaddict26 updated her story ****Not So Sweet Reunion****.. Chapter 6 is up!! Read it! Read it now!! **

**And I recently found a sad/awesome story called Too Late by ****Jayeliwood**

**Its sad but believe me you'll totally love it!! **

**Chapter 21: Jacob**

**BELLAS POV**

We drove home still covered in cake. We cleaned up as much as we could, but it didn't really help.

Edward parked outside of my house I sighed.

"What's Charlie thinking?" I asked nervously.

"He isn't upset at all. He is actually in a good mood. Fishing went well." He leaned over and kissed me. He was at my door the next second holding it open for me. He had a small basket in his hands. I looked at him questionably and he just smiled.

We walked to my front door slowly.

He gently wiped more cake off of my face and laughed as we opened the door and walked inside.

"Bella?" I heard Charlie call.

"Yes dad its me." who else would it be. It annoyed me sometimes but I let it slide. I walked into the living room. Charlie was smiling, and then he looked at me and Edward.

"What, what happen to you guys?"

"Well I took Bella on a picnic, and I made her a cake, and she had one piece and decided it would be better used to throw at me."

"Oh, I hope it wasn't at your house?"

"Oh no we were outside, no mess." Edward promised Charlie.

"I did how ever manage to snag a piece for you before she threw it everywhere." he smiled and handed Charlie the basket.

"Humph. He got me back though." I laughed. I looked up at Edward. He was so thoughtful. I really wish I could hear what my dad was thinking now.

"Thanks Edward." Charlie said as he took the basket and opened it.

"I should be getting home Bella. I'll see you tomorrow." He kissed my cheek and hugged me good bye. I walked with him to the door and out to his car.

"I'll be right back, thirty minutes tops. Alice is in your room waiting. I just have to take my car back and shower." he said as he flicked more cake off his shirt and laughed. "I love you Bella." he kissed me gently, and he was in his car.

I walked slowly back into my house.

"Bella." Charlie called. I walked into the living room.

"Yea dad?"

"Can I talk to you?"

"Sure."

"Ok Bella, I know I haven't been the best, with, Edward. But you have to understand where I'm coming from. He left you, you were so broken Bella. I just didn't want to see you hurt like that again. I'm sorry I've been so hard on him. But I see now that he is trying, he is trying not only to get your trust back but mine too."

"He already has mine dad. I trust him. I love him."

"I know Bella. Tell him next time you see him that he makes a really good chocolate cake." He smiled at me I walked over and went to hug him. "Ah, clean up first kiddo." He laughed.

I walked up to my room. Alice was sitting on my bed smiling.

"I see you had a fun filled day." she smirked.

"You could say that."

"Let me see it!" she said as she jumped up off the bed and ran toward me.

"See what?" and then it hit me. I held out my hand and spun the ring the right way.

"Do you like it?" she asked.

"Yes." I smiled.

"Then why hide it?"

"I'm not ready to tell Charlie yet. But I will, soon."

She nodded.

"I'm going to clean up. Take a shower." I grabbed my night clothes and headed for the bathroom.

The hot water on my back was relaxing. I smiled, at the thought of the last time I was in here. The memory flooded my mind. I was lost in thought as I finished my shower.

I walked into the hall, and downstairs. I hugged Charlie good night and headed back to my room. I stopped in the hall and looked down at the ring that was now mine. Now all I needed was eternity I thought as I opened the door.

Alice was sitting on my bed again, smiling.

"I am an open book, ask me what you will." She stated blankly.

"What are you talking about? Ask you what?"

"I see you have questions, ask away."

"I, uh. Fine." I sighed. "I don't know if you'll be able to answer no one will." I frowned. "I mean everyone told me, no one ever chose this, no one ever willingly chose to be a vampire."

"What do you want to know?"

"I want to know what I'll be like? Will I be able to resist the blood lust. Will I even ever be one of you?" I blurted

"Yes, Bella, I see you, I see you as one of us, and I see it happening soon. Don't be to willing to give up your human life Bella. You will miss it. Everyone does. Cherish these last weeks that you have."

"Weeks?" I smiled.

"Yes Bella weeks."

I heard a light tap on my window as I ran to it. Edward climbed inside. I swore I saw him glare at Alice lightly.

"I have it from here Alice, thank you."

"Good night Alice. Thanks." I hugged her good bye and she was out my window in a blur.

"You clean up nice." Edward stated as he walked me to the bed and pulled me onto his lap. He buried his face into my hair and breathed deeply.

"So do you." I placed my head on his chest and took in his sweet aroma. He smelled amazing.

He was rubbing my back.

"Bella. Why are you so impatient?"

"What do you mean?

"You honestly cant wait to become a monster can you?"

"No, I cant wait to be with you for eternity." I stated coolly. He smiled at me.

"Bella my love, you have me."

"I know, but you promised."

"That is a promise I intend to keep, do not worry so much about it."

"Ok." I sighed. "So when do we meet the rest?" I asked changing the subject.

"Later tonight. Until then get some rest." my eyes widened in fear. "Bella, sleep, I will not leave with out you." He promised as he laid down on the bed and pulled me to his chest. He started to hum my lullaby and I knew I couldn't fight it much longer.

I awoke, I don't even know where. I felt the wind blowing in my hair. I gasped was I still dreaming it was dark, darker than my room. I started to panic.

"Bella. Calm down or I'm going to drop you." I heard Edward say. I looked up. Sure enough, I was in his arms. He was no longer running he stopped when I started freaking out.

"I, sorry."

"It's fun, it was actually kind of cute."

"Cute? How was me freaking out, and you almost dropping me cute?" I blurted.

"Silly Bella, I would never drop you."

"Where are we?"

"I told you I wouldn't leave with out you."

I smiled up at him.

"Why didn't you just wake me?"

"You looked peaceful, and I knew you needed sleep. I was going to wake you when we got there, but you apparently couldn't wait." He grinned and started walking. I put my arms on his shoulders and pushed myself up so I was directly in front of his face.

"Bella, I cant see." he said as he stopped.

"That's the point." I laughed as I brought my lips to his. I wrapped my hands around the back of his neck, and entwined my fingers in his hair. I gently pulled away and began kissing his neck.

"Bella." He groaned and took a step back just as I began to nibble on his neck. "Bella!" he shouted as his feet came out from under him and he tripped over a root. I fell onto of him laughing with a thud.

"Who's the clumsy one now?" I laughed as I kissed his neck again.

"Well I'm glad you find this funny you could have been hurt!"

"You would never let anything hurt me, not even a tree root." I laughed again as I nipped at his neck.

"Oh, Bella you really like testing my self control don't you?"

"MM hmm." I began kissing around the collar of his shirt.

"They can hear us." I lifted my head and stared at him.

"Who can hear us?" I asked even though I already knew the answer.

"The grizzly bears who do you think."

"Uh I didn't know we were that close." I stated as I pushed my self into a sitting position.

"Well you didn't ask" Edward laughed as he stood up picking me up into his arms and started walking forward.

It was only a minute of walking before we came to the edge of the clearing. Everyone's eyes were on us. I blushed scarlet red and buried my head in Edwards shoulder.

"Its fine, for the most part they all are happy." He whispered to me.

"Most part?" I knew who wasn't included in that.

"Yes, he doesn't look happy." Edward said I sighed and looked forward. Jacob looked furious. I smiled weakly at him. He grinned but it didn't meet his eyes.

Edward placed me down when we reached the group.

"Edward, Bella." Sam nodded.

"Hey Sam." I smiled and Edward nodded.

"We have already told them Alice has seen Victoria move ahead of schedule. We were just going over fighting techniques Alice has seen them fight, they fight amongst themselves." Carlisle informed me and Edward.

"The pack shouldn't have any problem with the vampires though, that's what were made for." Jacob stated roughly

"Yes you should have no trouble, but they don't fight like normal vampires they are in a larger group. Larger than any of you have come across, and they know it. They fight as a together. As do we." Carlisle said coolly.

"What about the rogue Werewolves how do we handle them?" I asked shyly. I was scared.

"We are going to show you our weakness, as you have showed us yours." I looked at Sam and Smiled.

"There stronger, and bigger than you Sam." I gulped. How could any of them handle the rogues.

"It'll be ok Bella, we wont let anything happen to you." Sam looked at me put his hand on my shoulder.

"Its not me I'm worried about!" I shouted and shook it off. "Why don't any of you see that? Why anent any of you worried? This isn't some stupid walk in the park. This is serious! This Marcus has killed tons of vampires, and even more werewolves and NONE of you are worried! Stop worrying about me!" I shouted tears rolling down my face. Edward flinched at my sudden out burst but kept his arm wrapped around my waist. "I don't give a shit about me! Cant you see that. All of you, you all mean everything to me. It doesn't matter if your vampires or werewolves! I love all of you! If anything happen to any of you it will all be my fault! So stop worrying about me! Please, worry about yourselves! I cant handle if anything happen to any of you.!"

"Bella." Sam hesitated trying to argue.

"NO" I shouted. "It doesn't matter to me if you all are so calm and confident! You cant be sure! Even Alice cant see what's going to happen because of the Werewolves! She only sees when there not around! So don't tell me everything is going to be ok!" Edward pulled me closer to me. I heard Jacob let out a low growl, and Edward hissed. I couldn't take it anymore. I pushed Edward away from me. "If you two cant be civil to one another then I'm done! I will not be the middle person in this stupid fight! WHO CARES what you are! Enemies blah WHATEVER! Your working together now! So you must not be that big of enemies!" Everyone's eyes were on me, and my little outburst. I felt a wave of calm wash over me. I glared over at Jasper, and it stopped. He smiled weakly at me. "UGH! I cant take it anymore! I care about all of you and all you want to do is fight with each other!" I collapsed to the ground, and pulled my knees to my face and cried.

"Bella, I'm sorry." Edward said as he wrapped his arms around me.

"Bells, I'm sorry too." Jacob said as I felt him sit down beside me.

"Its mostly you two! The others can at least be civil." I sniffed.

"Bella, Love. We aren't fighting because were enemies." Edward laughed lightly. I lifted my head to look at them, I realized everyone else had moved slightly away to give us privacy, even though they could hear everything. I guess it was the thought that counts.

"Bells." I looked toward Jacob.

"Jacob, this isn't doing her any good. I'll be civil, and get along. If you will." Edward put his hand out. Jacob looked at Edward, to me, and then Edwards hand. He took it in his and they shook. I smiled weakly at both of them.

**EDWARDS POV**

The night went well from then on. Sam showed us some weak spots in werewolves. He still didn't feel comfortable sharing but he got over it. Every so often I could hear everyone's thoughts drift to Bella and her outburst.

'Stress must be getting to her'

'Poor Bella.'

To the all so popular, among the wolves anyway…

'Jacob would be so much better for her.'

It took all I had not to do or say anything. I kept my face blank with emotion. I started humming quietly to myself to block out there thoughts. This was going to be a long night. I watched as the wolves fought amongst them selves, showing us ways to get around them. Bella had a point. Marcus was much larger than any of the La Push pack, and they knew it.

It was our turn to show them how to handle a group of Vampires. They had no trouble with them I didn't see the point. Its what they were built for. Destroying us. Carlisle motioned for me. I looked at Bella as she shifted off my lap onto the ground and smiled at me. I kissed her forehead and got up to walk toward Carlisle. I saw out of the corner of my eye Jacob transform back to human form and walk toward Bella. I went to growl but caught myself. My family eyed me suspiciously.

I got enjoyment out of knowing Bella wasn't really paying attention to Jacob. She was watching me and my family intently. As we swayed and jumped out of the way of certain attacks. I knew we were probably just a blur to her, but it still amazed her. I slightly laughed at her face, her mouth was open as she gazed at me as I briskly spun out of the way from Emmett's attack.

Rose laughed lightly as her husband turned around and growled at me.

I saw Jasper stand and walk toward Bella.

"I know you worry about her." he said to Bella as he motioned toward Alice. "I want to show you why that is not necessary."

Alice stepped behind Jasper and closed her eyes. He made a dash for her and leaped into the air toward her. Bella gasped as jasper landed on his feet and rolled. He stood behind Alice now, who had a smirk on her face. Bella looked confused, as Jasper took another shot at her. Again he landed behind Alice. To the human eye it must appear she hadn't moved.

I laughed, "Bella, watch closely." I called to her. She squinted her eyes as jasper took another leap at Alice.

Bella's eyes widened as jasper landed in a crouch, behind Alice, and then Alice was a blur. Bella looked around shocked, to find her perched on top of Jaspers shoulders. Smiling wildly.

"She moves to fast, not only does she see what's going to happen before hand, but she's fast. Almost as fast as Edward." Jasper said as he smiled up at his wife.

I walked over toward Bella and sat beside her. Jacob was on the other side, his mind running wild with fantasies. I sighed.

Bella glanced over at me. I leaned in and wrapped my hand around her neck and pulled her onto my lap and kissed her.

She giggled. I smiled to myself, Jacobs thoughts were now longer on Bella, but different ways to kill me. I said I would be civil, I never said I'd be fair.

"Bella." Jacob called. She looked up at him. "Were having a big barbeque tomorrow. Everyone's going to be there. Emily would really love it if you came. You haven't been down there for like ever." Bella looked up at me. Ah he was good, he was real good.

I smiled down at her.

"I don't think that would be, a good.." I cut her off. I knew she wanted to go.

"Bella, we have nothing planned for tomorrow. Go have fun." Her eyes narrowed as she looked up at me again.

"Edward."

"Bella, you want to go. Do you not?"

"Well, sort of."

"Then go. I don't have a problem with it." I didn't she would be safe there as any other place. It was Jacob that worried me. The thoughts that raced through his head made me want to rip him to pieces.

"I, Edward."

"Bella, go, Jacob has a point, since I've been back I don't think you have been down there once." I smiled at her and kissed her forehead. I saw Jacob smile.

"Ok, but I wont be late."

"It's fine, I have three conditions though." I stated.

"What? I need conditions to take her?" Jacob blurted annoyed.

I smiled at him. "Nothing you cant handle, I'm sure."

"What conditions?" Bella questioned.

"First, I will take you to the boundary line, and Jacob will meet us there. I will also pick you up. I don't want you to be alone at all. Don't let her out of your sight." I glared at Jacob. "Although I doubt even if a hurricane could make your eyes wonder from her" I hissed under my breath.

"That's a good idea. I don't want her alone either." he nodded.

"Second, I want you to take a cell phone and call me if anything happens and call me when you are ready to leave and I will meet you." I looked down at Bella.

"Ok." She smiled up at me and kissed my neck.

"And thirdly?" Jacob said annoyed. This was giving me some pleasure watching him squirm.

"Third. Do not mistake this as trust. I do not trust you alone with Bella. Far from it! I do however trust you with her life. I trust you to keep her safe."

"I wouldn't hurt Bella!" He growled. I ignored him.

"I never said you would. I know you care about her, that is precisely why I don't trust you with her." I smiled. "I am trusting you with my life Jacob. For Bella is my only reason to exist. Do not bring her back to me in any other condition than when I drop her off to you. I don't want a hair out of place on he head."

He narrowed his eyes.

"I don't care if she falls on her own free will. Do not let her get hurt." I answered the question he was thinking.

"I wont let her get hurt." 'we both love her Edward neither of us want to see her hurt.' I heard him think directly at me. I glared and then smiled at him.

"I love you Bella. I want to protect you." I said as I smiled down at her.

"I love you too Edward." She pushed her self up and kissed me patiently. I glanced up at Jacob.

We finally pulled apart, I heard Jacobs thoughts again.

'I really hate you bloodsucker.'

I lifted my eyebrows and smiled at him.

"What time is this thing start Jake?" Bella asked as she turned to face him.

"I'll be dropping you off at three." I smiled.

"Stop that. I can answer myself."

"Sorry," I smiled at him. "Habit."

"Well break it." 'or ill break you.' He added in his head.

"That would be interesting."

Bella glanced from me to Jacob, confused.

"What's interesting?" she asked as she looked at me.

"Jacob. Me breaking the habit of hearing peoples thoughts. Its interesting."

"You cant hear mine." She beamed up at me.

"No, and I like it that way. Sometimes."

"You don't want to read my mind?"

"No, I want you to tell me things when your ready." I smiled down at her. She leaned her head into my shoulder.

The night passed quickly after that, I was on my way back to Bella's she was asleep in my arms. She had fallen asleep in my lap watching Jasper and Alice fight.

I gently placed Bella into her bed. She stirred.

"Edward."

"I'm here, go back to bed." I kissed her forehead as I slid into the bed beside her.

"MM." she snuggled her head into my chest. She was fast asleep again.

My mind raced, to the oncoming day. Bella, would be gone for the day. With Jacob. I growled at the thought. All his fantasies that went through his mind when I agreed to let Bella go. I shuddered at the thought. He even laid one hand on her head I would kill him! Ugh tomorrow was going to be a very long day.

I felt my phone buzz in my pocket I quickly flipped it open.

"Don't you even think about it!" I heard Alice angry pixie like voice on the other end.

"What are you talking about?" crap I thought, she had a vision.

"You know what. Not only would it mean the end of the treaty, but Bella would never forgive you for killing him!"

"Alice you didn't see what I saw in his head! The thoughts he had of her. It was all I had not to rip his head off in the clearing!" I hissed trying not to wake Bella.

"You know Bella, she loves you. I don't see that changing."

"She loves Jacob too." I said coolly.

"Edward even you cant be that stupid." she exclaimed as the other line went dead.

I put the phone back in my pocket. I knew I was being ridicules, but I still couldn't get Jacobs fantasies out of my head. I knew Bella would never allow any of them to come to be. But the thought still scared me.

I trusted her, with everything I had. It was Jacob that I didn't trust.


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N: OK TOTTAL.LY JUST GOT GOOSEBUMPS AGAIN.. HA IVE WATCHED IT LIKE A MILLION TIMES AND SO CANT GET ENOUGH….. HERES THE LINK TO THE FIRST OFFICIAL FULL SOON OF TWILIGHT.. FROM THE MTV MOVIE AWARDS PRESHOW!! **

**moviesblog./2008/06/01/watch-our-exclusive-twilight-clip-from-the-movie-awards-preshow/**

**that's for all the alerts+ and reviews.. **

**Thanks yet again to angel of sinne for another awesome and super long review!! She so rocks!! Lol... She thinks I should change my summary to get more people to read and review.. What do you all think!? Lol... **

**also we both agree. **

**Edward should totally be a real person lol… he has totally given the female population, un attainable expectations of the male race lol… shakes head**

**Also check out her story… ****Minutes to Midnight**** its really good!**

**Twilightaddict26 updated her story ****Not So Sweet Reunion****.. Chapter 6 is up!! Read it! Read it now!! **

**And I recently found a sad/awesome story called Too Late by ****Jayeliwood**

**Its sad but believe me you'll totally love it!! **

**Chapter 22: Barbeque**

**BELLAS POV**

I walked downstairs to see Charlie sitting at the kitchen table. Edward told me I should tell him where I would be today. Even though we both knew he wouldn't mind.

"Dad."

"Yea Bells."

"I'm going to go down to La Push today, there having a barbeque. Jacob invited me."

"Really Bells, that sounds like fun."

"Yea dad." I wanted to go hang out with Jacob. But I also didn't want to make Edward feel uncomfortable. He said he was fine with it but there was something he wasn't telling me.

Charlie had left to go do some paper work at the station. I was in my room with Edward.

"What's wrong." I heard him say as he got off the bed and walked toward me.

"Nothing."

"Bella, don't lie to me please. Your heart is racing. You cant look at me."

"I'm nervous." I cut him off.

"Of what?"

"You." I said bluntly. I was nervous he would get mad.

"What did I do?"

"Nothing that's the problem."

"You want me to do something?"

"I want you to freak out on me, yell at me tell me not to go. It's what you want to do!"

"Bella, where is this coming from? I'm serious when I say I want you to go. I know you want to go. So what's the problem."

"I don't want to make you uncomfortable."

"Bella, love. Your going off to my arch enemy…" I frowned at his words. He sighed. "I mean to Jacob. Ugh Bella I can't lie to you. He is my enemy but not for the reason you think. It has nothing to do with the fact he's a werewolf. That doesn't help his case at all but its not the reason."

"What's the reason." I said flatly and glared. I was sick of the fighting I didn't care who or what they were . Why should they.

"He loves you Bella.! Jacob is in love with you! You don't have to see what I see running through his head, the fantasies he has of you. Just accept the fact that I am letting you go. don't push it." I saw his face drop. He was scared, why should he be scared.

"He wont hurt me, and he wont let anything happen to me."

"Bella I know that."

"Then why do you look scared."

"I'm not scared." He growled at me.

"What ever!" I shouted back at him annoyed and walked toward my door.

"Bella." he was at my side in a second. "I'm sorry."

I sighed, "Ready to tell me the truth?"

"I, I'm not scared. I, I just don't trust him!" he said hesitantly

"Why? You trust me right?"

"Yes. Of course."

"Then what's the problem?"

"Bella, please." he begged. He didn't want to say what ever it was that was bothering him. I was getting mad and annoyed.

"Just tell me. You can tell me anything remember?"

"I don't want to hurt you." he lowered his eyes and looked at the floor.

"Edward. Please tell me, so I can try to help and fix it." I pleaded

"You cant fix it, you didn't do anything. I did."

"What did you do?" I was confused now. Why did boys have to be so damn confusing.

"Bella, I left you! I left you sad and broken! Jacobs the one that fixed you! He made you better. I will never forgive myself for leaving you, ever. I left you broken, and he fixed you, he will always have a part of you now, and I will always have to live with that."

"Edward. Honestly, I love him yes, but its nothing compared to what I fell for you. Nothing do you hear me?" I was crying.

"Bella, no please. Don't, don't cry." he wiped my tears with the back of his hand.

"I'm sorry, but your upset, because of me."

"No, no that's not it. I'm upset because of me. Because of what I did to you. What I left you to deal with. I left you for the taking and Jacob knew that and went after it. Now he knows he will always have a part of you that I can never get rid of."

"Edward I love you! Only you! I want to be with you, forever, for eternity. Jake is just my friend."

"I know that, but he wants more. God Bella he wants so much more. Sometimes I think it would have been better if I never…"

I cut him off, how dare he.

"Don't you ever talk like that again. What the hell Edward. Do you not love me? Do you regret coming back?" I was shouting.

"No of course not. But I mean Bella, you could have had a normal life if I didn't come back. You could have moved.."

"Edward I never would have moved on. Don't you see that? Can't you see that there will ever only be one man, one person, one creature for me? You, your all I want, your all I need. Please."

"Bella." He whispered In my ear, he took in a raged breath. He was crying too. "I love you. don't ever doubt that, its just I wonder what your life would have been like if I hadn't come into your life."

"I'd be dead." I stated bluntly. He slightly laughed at that fact.

"Danger magnet. Clumsy, beautiful klutz of mine. I love you Bella. I'm sorry. It's just you don't see what he thinks of you, what he dreams of you, and every time I'm around him he makes me see. He makes sure I know exactly what he wants." he was annoyed. How dare Jacob. I would be pissed if I was in his situation. How dare Jacob do that to him. I would have to talk to him about that. I didn't see how to, but I had to try. It wasn't fair to Edward. "I'm sorry, just know none of it will ever happen. I want you, and only you."

"As do I Bella, I want you for eternity." He smiled down at me and kissed my forehead.

"I should probably tell him about me being changed soon huh?" I asked sheepishly. I was not looking forward to it.

"If you want. I can tell him with you. He is not going to be happy. I'd rather you wait till I was around if you don't mind."

"Edward he's not going to hurt me."

"He may not mean it, but if he gets mad enough, he could snap at any moment and kill you with out meaning to." Before Edward even finished my thoughts went directly to Emily.

The ride was slow, and I wasn't the one driving. Edward drove the speed limit the entire way. I could tell he was still not happy about the whole situation, but I didn't press it further.

We decided to tell Jacob after everything with Victoria was settled. I was almost dreading telling Jacob as much as I was dreading everyone I cared about risking there lives for me.

I heard Edward take in a deep sigh, I looked over at him.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing, were like a minute away."

"Oh." I knew that meant he could hear everything Jacob was yelling at him. It annoyed me, why would he do that. Why would he knowingly piss Edward off. What was I talking about, I knew why. He was hoping it would set him off we'd fight and that would be the end. "What's he thinking."

"You don't want to know."

"I do, but if you don't want to talk about it."

"I really don't. Its not to late to change your mind." He smiled over at me. I wanted to make him happy, but i did miss everyone down at La Push.

"No, I miss everyone, and I need to talk to Jacob."

"About what?"

"I need to tell him he needs to knock it off, and grow up. Or I'm done. You have agreed to be civil and give him a chance for me. Why cant he dot he same." it's not that hard of a concept for a person to want the one the love and there best friend to get along.

"Bella, I don't want to be civil. I am only doing this because its better than fighting with you over it, and I know eventually you would recent me for keeping you away. Either that, or you would get hurt trying to sneak around my back to go see him."

"Edward its not just him, its everyone. I want to see Leah, Seth, Emily. Billy, I cant see them at the meetings at night and have a good time. Were talking about a fight that I don't want to happen. So please, trust me, trust the fact that everything will be ok. "

"I trust you. It's them." He paused and growled lightly. "Him, I don't trust." he nodded toward the windshield. He slowly pulled the car to a stop like twenty feet away from Jacobs car. I assumed the invisible boundary line was some where in the middle.

"I love you." I said as Edward opened my door for me and helped me out. He pulled me into a big hug, and kissed me patiently. He nuzzled his face into my hair and breathed my scent in.

I kissed him quickly on the cheek and walked toward Jacob, he slowly followed behind me.

Jacob pushed off his car and walked toward us.

"Edward." He stated between his teeth.

Edward just nodded, I heard him intake a quick raged breath. I took that as Jacob was showing him things again.

I gripped Edward hands gently. I went to walk to Jacobs car, Edward pulled me back quickly and kissed me again. I heard Jacob groan lightly under his breath.

As soon as I got to Jacobs car I went to wave good bye to Edward but the Volvo was already speeding around the corner. I sighed, this was going to be a long day, for all of us.

"Hey Bells. I'm so glad you could come today. I didn't think you'd be allowed." He said sarcastically. He was starting to annoy me already and we weren't even there yet.

"Who all is going to be there?" I asked curiously.

"Everyone." he stated plainly. Like I knew who everyone was.

"Who's everyone?" I laughed.

"My dad, Sam, Quil, Embry, Seth, Leah, Paul, Jared, Emily, Myself and you. Everyone do I need to go on?"

"No I supposed not." I sighed.

When we arrived I was hoisted out of the car by a very excited Quil.

"Ugh, Bella." he wrinkled up his nose. "You reek!"

"Then please put me down." I giggled.

"She does reek but I guess it's the downside of having a vampire as boyfriend." Embry called from behind.

"Thanks, I still don't think either one of you 'reek.' I think you all smell find to me."

"You don't have a heightened sense like we do."

"Soo… SO what." I caught myself. I almost blew my biggest secret. Edward would not have been happy. I was sick of people rubbing it in my face they don't grow old, oh your human you don't have super powers.

"So you cant smell what we smell." Quil said as he lead me over to the rest of the group.

"Bella." Seth nodded. I smiled.

"Hey Seth, Leah." Leah looked up at me and glared. I looked over toward Jacob, he looked at me apologetically.

I was amazed at how quick the day was going by. I was even more amazed at how much Jacob and the rest of the pack could eat. It was astounding, I was curious to how Emily paid for it all but decided it was none of my business.

I watched at how they all interacted with each other. It reminded me of one big family. Everyone seemed to look to Billy for answers. The pack however looked like they followed Sam and Jacob. I wondered how that worked. Jacob wasn't the leader, Sam was, so why did he have so much control over them.

"Lets play a game!" Seth yelled as he finished his sixth hot dog.

"What kind of game? I don't do well with games." I laughed.

"Bella, you wont be playing." Jacob said with a grin.

Paul came running over and tossed a football at me. I flinched and threw my hands up in reaction.

I waited for the impact and opened my eyes after a few seconds to see everyone laughing at me.

"I saved your life, you owe me, life of servitude." Jacob laughed as he held up the football.

"That wasn't funny."

"I'm pretty sure it was." Leah sneered at me as she walked past. She reminded me of Rosalie. What had I ever done wrong to piss these people off.

"Sorry." Jacob whispered as he lead me away.

"So football?" I asked, it amused me how much alike these sworn enemies were. Edward had his big family, Jacob had his, and they both played a stupid sport with each other. If only they knew how truly alike they were. I sighed at the thought, it would never happen, I could never bring these two worlds together.

I sat down on a patch of grass and watched the game, even in there human form they were fast and strong. Half way through the game I had realized who was the fastest, and it amused me even more.

Jacob flew by Paul, who scrambled to tackle him to the ground, but Jacob was just to fast for him. I watched as Leah purposely ran full on into Sam, sending him flying backward. That was about the time that everyone started wrapping up.

"What'd ya think?" Jacob came running over quickly I laughed. "What?"

"Nothing, you wouldn't understand."

"Try me. Lest go for a walk to the beach."

"Ok." I said as I went to get up, I tripped. Jacob caught my arm in his hand and pulled me to my feet.

"You really are a klutz aren't you?"

"So I've been told." I laughed as we headed for the beach.

When we got far enough away from the others, Jacob got closer to me, I tripped and he grabbed my hand.

I tried to pull away but he wasn't having it. He held my hand firmly in his. I sighed there was no use fighting it.

"So what wont I understand?" he asked me after a few minutes of silence.

"What?"

"Back there, what wouldn't I understand?"

"Oh, nothing. Its just." I paused, I didn't know If I should tell him about the Cullen's and baseball. Would it be to much to tell? Was it even my place?

"Bells?"

"Ok, Its just you guys are so much like Edwards family, its funny."

"How so?" he asked as he scrunched his nose up.

"You love everyone back there, just like Edward loves his family, even though neither the Pack or Edwards brothers and sisters are family by blood. You still love them like they are, and You're the fastest of the pack. Edward the fastest of his family. You play Football, and they play baseball. I mean come on. How ironic is that?"

"What does football have to do with baseball?"

"Nothing it's just. Ugh never mind!" I growled grumpily.

"What?"

"Nothing no matter what I say or try to do, its never going to work, your going to hate each other no matter how alike you are no matter how much it hurts me your going to continue to hate each other." I sighed as I pulled away from him.

"Bella, I'm sorry, but were nothing alike. As much as you want us to be, were not. We never will be."

"I know, but is it so wrong of me to want the man I love and my best guy friend to at least pretend to like each other?" I grumbled.

"No its not, but when the man you love and your best friend just happen to be vampire and a werewolf that idea sort of goes out the window." He smiled at me. "By the way, which ones which?" He laughed.

"Ugh, Jacob! About that, why would you purposely make Edward see all of that?"

"All of what?" He played dumb.

"You know what."

"No really, I don't, tell me." his face went blank, it would have been a good poker face. I sighed, he was going to make me say it.

"Everything you think about, they way, the way you feel about me!"

"Oh that stuff."

"Yes that stuff!"

"What's wrong, its what I feel Bella! He cant change that, its not my fault he goes snooping around in my head!" he growled.

"You shout it at him he cant ignore it!" I shot back.

"So what Bella, it's the way I feel! I'm sorry if poor Edward doesn't like that. But that's to damn bad!"

"Jacob, please!"

"No, I will not change the way I feel. I can think what ever the hell I want to think."

"Jacob!" I growled. "What am I going to do with the two of you." I sighed.

"I don't know." He looked away from me.

We sat there in silence for a long while watching the waves crash onto the beach.

"Bella."

"What?"

"Do you love him?"

"Yes."

"I mean really love him."

"Jacob, I wouldn't say yes if I didn't mean it. Of course I love him. I wouldn't know what to do with out him, I couldn't survive."

"You could! You could though, you didn't even try." he said weakly.

"Jacob, I didn't want to try, even If I could, I wouldn't want to."

"Bells. I could make you happy. You already love me. I can give you so much more than him."

"Jacob. Please, don't"

"What happens when you start to look like his mom?"

"That's not going to happen!" I blurted out not realizing what I was saying.

"What? What do you mean?" he said hesitantly. I could tell he didn't really want to hear the answer. I frowned down at my boots.

"I'm sorry." I finally said.

"Sorry for what. Bella, no. Please, no." he begged.

I just nodded.

"YOu cant be serious. I mean this is, that's stupid! You, you can't I wont let you!"

"You cant stop me! Its what I want!"

"How do you know what you want? You cant just decide to, become a bloodsucker. One of them, I mean Bella! You just cant! What about Charlie?""I'll deal with him."

"What are you going to say? Oh I'm sorry dad I've decided to throw my life away, literally to go be with Edward who just so happens to be my vampire bloodsucking boyfriend!" he yelled.

"I, Jacob."

"Bella don't!" He shot up, and stalked off.

"Jake wait!" I called after him as I tried to catch up.

"Bella you cant do this! You cant just give your life away for him. How do you know he's really what you want?" he kept walking not letting me catch up.

"Because I love him! I just know! I wont be giving my life away, I'll still be around Jacob!"

"No you wont! You wont be Bella anymore. You wont be you."

"Yes I will."

"No, you wont. You'll be like him! I cant, you'll be my enemy!"

"No I wont! Don't you see you guys don't have to be enemies? The pack against the Cullen's it doesn't have to be that way!"

"yes it does, and it will be that way! How can you do this Bella, how can you do this." He stopped abruptly and I almost ran into his back.

"Jacob, I love him and only him."

"How do you know that? How do you know when he is the only other person you have gone out with how do you know he's what you want when you haven't had anything different?" he shouted at me as he turned to look at me.

"I just do, I can feel it."

"No I wont let you throw your life away." He grabbed me in his arms and held me tightly against his warm body.

"Jacob." I tried to pull away, push away from him. It was no use.

"Don't make me tell Charlie."

"You wouldn't! you'd expose yourself and the pack in the process."

"Who said I was going to tell him the truth, I can make up a lie that will have Charlie ban you from seeing him."

"It wont work, he already tried."

"Bella. He left you once! What's to say he wont get bored in five years and leave you again. Oh wait, you love him so that makes everything ok. I forgot!"

"He wont! You don't know the entire story!"

"Then enlighten me!"

"It's none of your business. I love him that's all you need to know!"

"Bella." He whispered as he leaned forward.

"Jacob, no." It was to late. His warm lips were on mine in a second. I couldn't even move my face away. He had me held so tightly I was sure to have bruises.

I struggled to get my arms free. I finally managed to get my one arm out from his grasp.

I pulled it back and struck him in the side of the head, I pulled his hair. It did nothing. I finally realized I could move my legs I pulled back and kicked him hard in the shin. He pulled away abruptly dropping me to the ground. I groaned in pain as I landed on my knee.

"OW! Dammit Bella!"

"Damn me? Damn you! You idiot! Did you not just hear anything I said?"

"I heard it all, but how can you be sure if you haven't had anything other than him!"

"I want to go home. NOW!" I shouted as I pushed myself off the ground and headed back.

"Bella wait!" He shouted as he grabbed my wrist.

"Don't touch me!" I screamed as I twisted and jerked as I tried to pull my arm away. I felt pain shoot threw my hand.

I groaned as I grabbed my wrist in my other hand.

"Bella, stop, just stop!"

"NO! I want to go home!"

"You popped your wrist, stop let me look at it."

"Don't, you touch me!"

"Bella!"

"Jacob Black. I hate you!" walked away from him.

"Let me drive you at least. He cant come get you here." He smiled. How could he be smiling at a time like this. I was serious and he looks like it's just one big joke! Ugh men!

"Fine!" I was to upset to argue.

I grabbed the cell phone out of my pocket and dialed Edward. He answered the phone on the first ring. I wonder if he was waiting phone in hand all day.

"Bella?"

"I'm ready to come home." my voice was shaky.

"What's wrong?"

"I just want to come home." I heard the car door slam and squeal of tires.

"I'm on my way."

"Bella I'm sorry." Jacob said as we drove to meet Edward.

I said nothing I wanted nothing more than for Edward to rearrange his face.

The rabbit came to an abrupt stop as we rounded the corner toward the boundary line. I jerked forward against the seatbelt.

"SHIT!" Jacob yelled as he slammed his hand into the steering wheel and looked forward to what was waiting.

**A/N: Tell me what ya think!! Ohhh whats waiting for Jacob!? **


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N: OK TOTTAL.LY JUST GOT GOOSEBUMPS AGAIN.. HA IVE WATCHED IT LIKE A MILLION TIMES AND SO CANT GET ENOUGH….. HERES THE LINK TO THE FIRST OFFICIAL FULL SOON OF TWILIGHT.. FROM THE MTV MOVIE AWARDS PRESHOW!! **

**moviesblog./2008/06/01/watch-our-exclusive-twilight-clip-from-the-movie-awards-preshow/**

**thanks for all the alerts+ and reviews.. **

**Thanks yet again to angel of sinne for another awesome and super long review!! She so rocks!! Lol... **

**also we both agree. **

**Edward should totally be a real person lol… he has totally given the female population, un attainable expectations of the male race lol… shakes head**

**Also check out her story… Minutes to Midnight its really good!**

**Twilightaddict26 updated her story Not So Sweet Reunion.. Chapter 6 is up!! Read it! Read it now!! **

**And I recently found a sad/awesome story called Too Late by Jayeliwood**

**believe me you'll totally love it!! **

**Chapter 23: Bruised ego**

There was two cars waiting for me. Edward Silver Volvo and Emmett's big jeep. Edward was pacing back and forth Alice was sitting on top of the Volvo's hood, and Jasper was standing next to her patiently. Emmett was sitting in his jeep with the door open.

I went to get out of the car Jacob tried to help me out I pushed him away.

"I can do it myself! I don't need your help!"

"Fine." he snapped.

I ran toward Edward, he was watched me carefully. I wondered if he was waiting for me to fall or cross the boundary line. When I was crossed over, he was a blur and I was suddenly in his arms.

"What happen. Are you ok?"

I wrapped my arms around him tightly.

"Bella, answer me."

"I'm Fine."

"No your not." I pulled away slightly from him releasing my arms.

"I just want to go home. Please." I begged. I wanted to get as far away as possible.

"Ok." He said hesitantly I could tell this wasn't just going to go away.

"I never wanna come back either!" I shouted. Edward narrowed his eyes. Alice slid herself off the Volvo and walked toward me.

"Bella! Please! I'm sorry." I heard Jacob shout from behind me. Suddenly Emmett was beside me in a flash.

I turned quickly around to see Jacob half jogging toward me. I glared in his direction. I felt Edwards hold on me tighten.

"GO away!" I yelled and turned to walk toward the car. Jacob grabbed a hold of my arm and tried to pull me back.

"Get off of me! Don't touch me Jacob!" I pulled my arm away and glared at him. Number of things happen after that.

I heard Edward growl viciously, Alice hissed, Jasper sent a wave of calm over everyone, and Emmett took a step forward growled loudly in his throat.

"Jacob what ever you did to her, I swear to you. If you hurt her in anyway, Victoria will be the least of your worries!" Edward threatened. "I would Kill you right now, but your lucky Bella would be mad, or you would not be going home dog!"

"Humph, I would not be mad! If I could do it I would!" I replied. Be mad, he deserves it all.

"You would be Bella, that is why he still walks on his own free will. Lets go." He looked toward Alice and them. Alice pouted as she walked toward the Jeep. Jasper and Emmett were already climbing inside.

"Jake just go home, I don't want to talk to you! EVER!" I shouted. As Edward led me to his car.

"Bells, wait." Jacob grabbed my wrist and stopped me. A shot of pain went through my entire arm and hand.

"OW! Jacob get off of me! Your hurting me!" I yelped as I pulled my arm away from him and grabbed it with my other hand. I didn't notice before but there was a big bruise on my wrist. Whether from now or before I didn't know.

"I'm sorry Bella, please listen to me."

Emmett was by my side in an instant. I had never seen him be so protective before.

"Touch her again mongrel and you WILL be sorry." Emmett said through his clenched teeth.

"This is between me and Bella!" Jacob glared.

I never would have said Emmett would meet his match, but Jacob had grew so much. He was pretty much Emmett's size.

"Bella obviously wants nothing to do with you." Alice shouted.

Jacobs eyes narrowed to me. They were almost pleading.

"Just go Jake." I stated. Suddenly my anger was melting away.

"I will not leave you with these, these bloodsuckers!" Jacob shouted.

AH and there the anger came whipping all threw my entire body. I wasn't thinking I was just acting. I hurled myself toward Jake fist flying. I was suddenly within reach when I was grabbed around my waist and pulled back. I looked up Jacob didn't even flinch. Ugh I hated this, I wanted to hurt him.

"Jacob Black I hate you! GO home!" I shouted as I tried to kick at him.

"Bella, Love, calm down. Don't do anything you'll regret."

"Ugh I'm going to regret not hitting him, let me go." I whined.

"Bella, if I thought for a second that you wouldn't regret me hitting him, breaking his jaw, killing him. Hell all of the above. I would do so. But I know you, and I know you will regret it soon, when you've calmed down." Edward said as he kissed my neck and pulled me closer to the car.

"Let her go! If she wants to come to this side let her!" Jacob roared. "Stupid parasite." he whispered, just loud enough for everyone to hear.

"If I let her go she wouldn't end up hurting you like she wants, she would only hurt herself, and then, I WOULD have to hurt you whether she liked it or not." Edward shot as he opened the car door.

"Bella, please! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to!"

I pulled away from Edwards grasp.

"Jacob! Just go home! If you were sorry you wouldn't of done it!" I shouted at him again. Everyone's eyes were on me.

"What did he do Bella?" Edwards eyes burned into mine.

"Yea what'd the stupid mongrel do, we'll teach him a lesson." Emmett said with a smirk.

"Nothing!, I just want to go home." I shouted as I threw my arms up into the air. "Why wont anyone listen to me!" I yelled and brought my hand down on the hood of the Volvo with out thinking. I yelped with pain as my hand came in contact with the hood. Edward grabbed my arm and pulled my hand closer to his face. He examined my hand closely. Jasper sent another wave of calm at me. I smiled at him slightly. Alice gasped as she saw my wrist was swollen and the finger shaped bruises on my wrist. I saw Jake look at the ground. Edwards face shot toward Jacob as he let go of me and took a few steps toward Jake. If looks could kill I have no doubt in my mind Jacob would be a cold dead corpse on the ground.

"What, did you, do to her." Edward growled trying to keep himself calm.

"She did it to herself!"

"You grab her arm and her wrist!" Jacob must have remembered what happen, Edwards face became blank with emotion, and then he was furious. "She tries to pull away so you hold on tighter! What the hell is wrong with you!" he growled.

"Stupid mongrel. She didn't want you touching her!" Alice hissed.

"Please, I just want to go home." I pleaded trying to look as sad as possible.

Edward turned to face me, he looked more like a vampire than he ever had before. He was actually scary looking. I gulped, just as the fury was wiped off his face. He smiled at me lovingly.

"Ok love, I'm going to call Charlie, tell him I'm taking you to see Carlisle first for your wrist and I'll bring you home after."

I nodded as he walked over to me. He looked back at Jacob,

"You, I will deal with later!" he hissed. "As I said before If Bella wouldn't regret letting me do something, you would be a dead dog!"

I smiled up at him. I really did want him to hurt Jacob, but I knew he was also probably right. As much as I didn't want to except it, I sighed.

"Bells, please. I didn't mean to hurt you. If you would have just listened to me. Please lets talk." he took step toward me.

"Jacob go home!" I growled. Oh how I wish I was a strong fast vampire right now.

"Bella." he took another step toward me trying to reach out for my arm. I stepped back slightly.

"Bella." I looked up to see Emmett's face, he looked apologetic, and then he smiled at me. Jacob let out an angry frustrated growl. Emmett's face dropped, and then he was just a blur as he came to an abrupt stop in front of Jacob.

Jacob took a jump back.

"What do you want! Parasite!" Jacob shot at him.

"You know what I was just going to talk to you, tell you to listen to her. Give her time to cool of. But right now I don't give a shit if Bella is angry at me for the next three hundred years, this will so be worth it."

The next second Jacob was hurtling backward.

"Emmett!" Alice yelled. Jasper sent a huge wave of calm, bigger than I had ever felt. Alice tried to walk toward her brother. But Jasper caught her around the middle.

Edward was next to his brother in a second, leaving me next to the car horror struck.

Jacob came running back growling viciously.

I ran toward them. Jacob was shaking violently. I saw his lip was bleeding. I stepped in front of Edward and Emmett.

Jacob looked down at me, I tried to apologize with my eyes. I really didn't want him to transform here. That would be nothing but bad. At the sight of me he slowly began to calm himself down though. I was thankful for that.

"Jake, just go home, please." I pleaded.

"Bella, let me explain." he said as he fiddled with a wolf pendant he had around his neck.

"I don't need an explanation right now, my wrist hurts. My hand hurts. Everyone is angry, and fighting. I think its best if we all just go home and take this time to calm down. We have bigger things to worry about."

"Bells I…"

"I'll see you tonight Jake." I cut him off annoyed. I turned toward the cars and grabbed both Edward and Emmett's arms and pulled them away.

"Bella!" Jacob said softly.

"Dog your really testing my patience right now. Listen to her. Your lucky all you got was a little tap in the face! Next time you wont be so lucky!" Edward shot back at him as he helped me into the passenger side of his car.

The car ride consist of every thirty seconds, I had to be checked on.

'your wrist ok, how's your hand, how's your arm. Its swollen do you want me to pull over somewhere and get ice.'

Every single answer was the same. I didn't want ice, of course it hurts, I just want to go see Carlisle.

We finally got back to the Cullen's house and Carlisle was waiting for us in the garage.

"Lets get her inside and I'll take a look."

"Thank you." I said as Edward and Emmett both helped me out of the car.

"What exactly happen."

"Jacob grabbed my arm to try and keep me from walking away. I tried to pull my hand free.."

"And the stupid dumb mongrel held on tighter!" Edward cut me off. Carlisle eyed him curiously.

"I think when I tried to pull away I twisted it the wrong way or something." I lifted my hand up for him to see.

"Ok, lets get her inside and ill have a look. Does your father know where you are?"

I nodded

Edward grabbed his cell phone out of his pocket.

"Charlie?" I heard Edward ask.

"No no, She's fine. I went to pick her up from Jacob. She hurt her wrist though, it's a bit swollen and bruised." he went silent for a second.

"That's where we are now, well sort of. You know Bella, she didn't want to go to the hospital. So I brought her home so Carlisle can take a look at it." he smiled and started nodding to himself.

"Yes, of course. Alice is here yes, I can bring her home sir, its no problem." he laughed. I was so confused, Charlie and him were talking like, I don't know. But it wasn't what I had become used to.

"No sir. It's fine, I don't think she'll need Alice's help this time, its just her wrist… ok I will. Thank you." he closed his phone and slid it back into his pocket.

"What was that about?" I asked curiously as I sat down on the couch so Carlisle could look over my hand.

"He said thank you for letting him know. He wanted to know if he had to come get you, and then he wanted to know if Alice was here, because he thought you were going to need help again, like last time. But I assured him it was just your arm, and you would be fine." He smiled at me.

"Oh, ok." I couldn't think of what else to say.

"I think he's beginning to like me again." he stated

"Don't press your luck." I laughed

"I heard what he thought, he said it was very respectful of me to call and let him know that you were ok, and where you were and that you might be late."

"That all?" I smiled.

"Well at first when he heard it was me he thought about getting his gun and thinking of how to get away with murder but decided against it." He chuckled.

Carlisle grabbed my hand and began to look over it, twisting it and pressing his fingers on it gently. I winced in pain as he put his thumb against the bruise. Edward smiled slightly at me.

"How's it look?" he asked.

"Fine, nothing's broke. I think its just bruised. Take some Tylenol for the pain. She might have sprained it though, if it doesn't feel any better by morning we can wrap it." he said as he stood up and handed me some Tylenol.

I groaned.

"Ah none of that, if Carlisle says it needs to be wrapped then that's what we are going to do." Edward said sternly

I frowned.

He picked me up in his arms and kissed my forehead.

"Bella, what are we going to do with you."

"Wrap her in a big bubble." Emmett said from behind us.

Edward laughed and turned toward him. I glared jokingly at Emmett.

"I'll wrap you in a bubble!" I tried to kick at him, but I wasn't close enough.

"Ah ferocious human girl aren't we?"

I smiled up at him.

"What? No come back?" he asked

"No, I figure I owe you." I said as Edward placed me on my feet.

"For what?"

"Being the only one to actually listen to me. When I said to hit him."

"Your not mad?"

"No, I wanted it, at the time."

"And now?" Edward asked with a grin.

"I don't regret it!" I replied. "I just feel bad."

"Don't he deserved that and much more. He's lucky I only punched him." Emmett stated with a satisfied grin.

"Who'd we punch?" Esme came walking into the living with a bag of ice, and handed it to me. She leaned down and kissed my cheek.

"No one. It was nothing." Emmett replied as he walked away.

I looked up at Edward, he smiled that crooked smile I so love.

"I should get you home, it's going to be a long night." He grabbed my good hand and lead me out to the garage.

Emmett was sitting against his jeep.

"So, what's the thought of we don't tell them about our, uh little incident?"

"Even if we don't tell them the pack might." Edward said to his brother. Emmett sank a little further down the jeeps side.

"I'm so dead."

"Your not dead, why would you be dead, he started it." I said as I walked over and hugged Emmett in as big of a bear hug as I could give.

"What if they decided we aren't trust worthy and don't want to help us?"

"They wouldn't do that, they care about Bella to much not to." Edward promised.

"Yea, I think everyone does." Emmett said as he squeezed me once more and let go.

"Lets get you home love." Edward said as he helped me in the passenger side door. "Emmett do me a favor, come with so you can just take my car home."

"Ok." Emmett said as he climbed into the back seat.

Charlie was asleep on the couch when we got home. Edward walked me to the door, and swiftly was off to wait in my room. I heard Emmett speed down the road as I walked over to wake Charlie up.

"Dad, dad. Wake up, your going to hurt yourself sleeping like that."

"Bella?"

"Yea dad."

"How's your wrist." He slurred half asleep.

"It's fine, just bruised. Now go up to bed."

He slowly worked his way up the stairs and plopped down onto his bed. He was fast asleep again before his head even hit the pillow.

I waked into my room to find Edward leaning half out the window. He almost looked like he was looking for something. Or someone.

"What is it?" I must have startled him he jumped slightly and pulled himself back into the room.

"Nothing. Just, checking."

"Checking what?" I asked suspiciously.

"Sometimes I hear him out there, he comes to check on you. I was just seeing if he had the balls to come tonight."

"Oh." was all I could say, I really did feel bad for Jake, he didn't ask for any of this. He didn't ask for me to fall in love with a vampire, he didn't ask for him to be able to transform into a werewolf. He was maybe just as unlucky as I was. I looked down at the inside of my left hand, I spun the ring around the right way and admired it. He certainly didn't ask for me to break his heart. I sighed and spun it back around so all that anyone could see was the sliver band. I would rather had taken it off, but I knew that would have offended Edward.

"Bella." Edward whispered. "He'll forgive you, don't worry."

"Maybe it's better if he doesn't." it was true, if he hated me, it would make the fact of me marrying Edward somewhat easier. It would make the fact that I was going to be a one of the 'cold ones' that much more simple.

"What do you mean?"

"It would hurt less maybe, hopefully." I frowned.

"Bella, he loves you, the pain is always going to be heart breaking no matter how you spin it."

"I know." I exhaled loudly with a huff.

"Bella, I'm sorry. I know there isn't anything I can do, but I still am sorry."

"Why are you sorry. You hate Jacob, I know why you do. You were right, about everything. You were right not to trust him, he kissed me. It's all my fault." I noticed he stopped breathing when I said he had kissed me. His lips were clenched together in a tight line.

"Bella." He breathed in a raged breath. "None of this is your fault, you didn't ask him to kiss you. You certainly didn't ask for him to leave a big bruise of his hand on your wrist either. Stop blaming yourself. This is Jacobs fault and only his fault, and he knows it."

"I guess, but it's my fault he's hurting."

"No, he knows how you feel. He knows where your heart lies. He just doesn't want to except it. That is his own fault. It's his own fault that he keeps getting hurt."

I frowned and let out a sigh.

"Get some sleep. Do you want to come tonight?" Edward asked, I shot my face up toward him eyes wide. "Ok, I'll take that as a yes, but I wish you would reconsider. If the pack is angry at Emmett and me. I'd rather not have you there."

"I'm going!" I stated forcefully.

"Ok, fine, then get some sleep." he pulled me to the bed and laid be down in his arms. He began to hum my lullaby.

It didn't work my mind was to busy with thought to let me sleep.

"I wish you would have slept at least a little." Edward said as he walked through the woods toward the edge of the clearing.

"I'm fine."

"That why I just heard you yawn?" He laughed.

"I think I'm going to talk to Jake." I said ignoring his joke.

"Ok."

"That's it? Ok. that's all I get?"

"What do you want me to say? That I'm happy?"

"Well no. I'm just going to tell him everything." I held the inside of my hand up so he could see the diamond I was hiding.

"I think that's a good idea."

"Honestly?"

"Yes, he should know the truth. Maybe then he wouldn't take it so hard that you were going to be changed.

"That's sort of what we were fighting about when he grabbed my wrist." I said sheepishly.

"I thought we were going to do that together. I told you he would over react and hurt you Bella."

"I already told you, that you were right about everything! I didn't mean to it just slipped he was fighting with me about you and it came out. I'm sorry."

"It's fine I'm juts glad you weren't hurt worse."

"He wouldn't of hurt me if I wasn't struggling with him."

"Isabella Marie Swan! Do not make this seem less than what it is. He hurt you, end of story! Struggle or no struggle he should know his own strength. He had to have squeezed your wrist pretty tight to leave a perfect bruise of his hand!"

"I, Ok, fine. But It wouldn't hurt if I hadn't of twisted it out of his hand."

"Maybe, but that's not the point."

"I know, but Edward I still need to talk to him. Tell him the truth."

"Ok, but you wont be with him alone."

I sighed, I knew he wouldn't let me go alone to tell him. So why bother fighting it.

"Ok, after all of this is settled we'll tell him were engaged and getting married, and that I will soon be changed."

"Yes, we all have enough to deal with right now I suppose." he slightly frowned.

"You just want to hear his heart break!" I said annoyed as I stalked away reaching the edge of the clearing.

"Maybe. But Emmett already bruised his ego." Edward laughed.

We stopped dead in our tracks. Sam was busy yelling at Paul and then back to Jacob. Carlisle was a bit away from the pack yelling at Emmett, and asking how Alice and Jasper could have let this happen.

All there heads turned toward us, toward me.

"Edward!" Carlisle called. I heard Edward gulp as we walked forward.

"What, were you thinking?"

"Me? Emmett's the one that decked him!" he shouted.

"Thanks!" Emmett said as he slumped to the ground.

"Stop this all of you!" I shouted as I walked to the spot directly between the pack and the Cullen's. Everyone stopped and looked to me. "Jacob was thoughtless, he wasn't thinking when he acted. He was just following his heart. Can any of you say you haven't done the same thing before?" I shouted. "It's my fault that my hand is hurt, I twisted my hand to try to get away from Jacob cause I was mad that he kissed me knowing full well how I felt." I yelled, I looked over to Jacob, his face was hurt, I could see the pain in his eyes. "I'm sorry Jake, I love you, but it will never be more than friendship for me. I love Edward."

"It's not your fault Bells. It's mine if I wouldn't have tried to kiss you to make you think you didn't love Edward, that you loved me more. This wouldn't have happen. I was stupid. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you." Jake said as he looked at me.

"It's ok. I know why you did it. I was just upset."

"That still doesn't explain why your son hit him." Sam said calmly looking at Edward.

"I was mad! He hurt Bella. Look at her wrist! You'd be mad to if you were in my place. Edward and Jacob are not the only one who cares for her. Why else would we all be here. If it was reversed I'm sure with Paul's temper he would have done the same." Emmett said as he stood up to defend himself.

"I see your point. We all do care about Bella, and Paul does have a temper." Embry said as he smiled widely t me.

"We have more pressing matters at hand." Sam stated.

"He's right we shouldn't be fighting amongst ourselves." Carlisle added.

Just then Edward growled loudly. So loud it scared me, I jumped to the side.

"Ah, Edward, Edward, Edward. You should be more careful. wouldn't want to scare my precious Bella to death, oh no. that's my job." I heard Victoria's shrill cackle it made my hair stand on end. Everyone was looking all around them, surrounding me in a circle in the process. I saw out of the corner of my eye a white figure come into the clearing. Everyone's eyes were on her, As two large figures appeared on either side of her in the woods. My heart was racing so fast in my chest I thought it was going to jump out. She looked directly at me and I gulped, as I felt Edwards tight but gently grip on my arm.

"Dear Bella, Ready to die?"

**A?N: I know I know your totally going to hate me for leaving it at a cliffy like this lol.. But I'm sorry haha… I'm half way through the next chapter so if I finish It might be up tonight, if not you'll hafta wait till tomorrow.. lol**


	24. Chapter 24

**A/N: **

**thanks for all the alerts+ and reviews.. **

**Thanks yet again to angel of sinne for another awesome and super long review!! She so rocks!! Lol... She also got her wish and so this chapter is for her! Lol…**

**Edward should totally be a real person lol… he has totally given the female population, un attainable expectations of the male race lol… shakes head**

**Chapter 24: Waiting**

"Victoria leave now!" Sam shouted.

"Or what?" She sneered. "Forgetting I have friends?" She laughed as Marcus and Michael stepped into the clearing already transformed to there wolf state there size alone scared me. The sight of there snarling gleaming blood stained teeth frightened the hell out of me.

I was shaking, my heart was racing a mile a minute. I wanted to run, but I knew it would make no difference. I was dead one way or another.

"I'm so sorry Edward." Alice was shaking her head. "Bella please forgive me."

"For what?" I gulped. Oh no who did she see die.

"Alice, you couldn't see this. I didn't hear them until it was to late." He whispered.

"Bells we wont let anything happen to you." Jacob said as he stepped closer to me. "That I do know, Edward loves you, and so does his family. We will protect you."

"Who's going to protect all of you?" I whimpered.

"Ah how sweet. To bad really. No one is going to protect your friends deary." Victoria snarled as more figures appeared, and stepped into the clearing.

I heard everyone around me take a deep breath. A huge group of vampires stepped into the clearing. There were a lot more than eight. All as vicious looking as the next. I counted quickly in my mind. There had to be at least 15 I tried to count again.

"She smells delicious. Please can we share?"

"No, leave the girl, the rest you can have your way with. As for you, Marcus, Michael. Use there bones as chew toys!" She laughed.

I couldn't let this happen, I couldn't let anyone get hurt because of me. I took a step forward toward Victoria.

"Say goodbye Bella. Your mine!"

Before I even knew she was a blur. Snarling and growling erupted from all around me. I heard the entire pack transform into snarling beast.

Victoria flung herself at me. Jacob and Edward both caught her by her shoulders and threw her backwards. Marcus came barreling toward me from now where, I was in shock at the large enormous creature that was snarling for me just a few feet in front of me. I couldn't move, I tried to turn, to run, my legs wouldn't work. I tried to scream, to say something, words were lost to me.

Sam caught Marcus in the side shoving him sideways away from me.

"Alice! Emmett! Get Bella, Protect her!" Edward shouted as he attacked Marcus from behind helping Sam.

My eyes were wide with terror as I watched the love of my life get thrown threw the air by a slash of Marcus paw.

"EDWARD!" I screamed finally.

Edward landed in a crouch, as Marcus shoved Sam aside like he was a feather and ran forward toward him.

"Bella!" Emmett yelled as he grabbed my by the waist and we both landed on the ground with a thud. It knocked my breath away. I gasped for air as I saw Michael take another leap at me. I was the prey, he was the predator. Emmett's hands were over me in a second pulling me on top of him. I turned to where I just was and there was a huge rush of fur barely a foot from my face. I heard a snarl as I looked up into the eyes of predator.

Rose let out a loud gasp as she hurled a tree trunk into Michaels backside. It hit him with a loud crack. He turned toward Rosalie bearing his teeth. He leaped at her.

"Rose!" Esme shouted as she pounced on Michael, he let out a loud whimper as she tore her teeth into his shoulder ripping into his flesh.

I searched for Edward, my eyes darting in every direction I couldn't find him.

I heard Esme groan as she hit the ground a few feet in front of me. One of the vampires was on her in a second. But before he could even attack her, he was ripped in two by Carlisle. Esme smiled up at him as she got to her feet.

"Good acting." he commended her they were off into the battle again. She was faking she wasn't hurt. My mind wondered to Edward I still couldn't find him.

Suddenly Alice's arms were around me in a second. Emmett jumped in front of me just as another vampire tried to attack. He grabbed the vampires arm and pulled it out of the socket, ripping the vampires arm away from his body. He dropped it to the ground as he grabbed for the other one. The vampire yelled in pure agony.

Then there was nothing left but a pile of bloody pieces.

Another vampire ran for me. As Emmett ran in front of me again hitting the vampire in the side sending him flying.

"LEAVE HER SHES MINE!" I heard Victoria shout from somewhere. I didn't know where. Suddenly I was pulled away from Alice. I shrieked in terror. Emmett's face shot toward me and he was gone. Before I knew it was on the ground again. I landed on my bruised wrist. I heard a pop and as my arm suddenly was filled with pain.

I screamed out in agony.

"Bella?" I heard it, I heard the velvet voice I needed to hear. I searched for Edward again. Finally seeing him he was by my side in a second.

"Edward." I screamed as I grabbed him around his neck with my good arm.

"I have to pop your shoulder back in place. This is going to hurt." He grabbed my arm and pulled and twisted it. I heard another pop, as I screamed in pain.

He had me in his arms as he pulled me to my feet. My arm still hurt but not as much as before.

I looked all around me, everyone was fighting, most were just blurs, I couldn't tell who was winning, or who was who.

Then I saw three blurred figures coming toward me. Edward was thrown out of the way, and I was knocked back onto the ground. I saw Marcus take of toward Edward.

Victoria was crouching over me.

"Mate for a Mate" she bared her teeth and came close to my neck I could feel her cold breath against my skin. I shuddered.

Suddenly she shrieked and I was being hoisted into the air again.

"Bells are you ok?" Jacob panted as he set me on my feet. I looked up at him.

"Jake look out!" I screamed as Michael came running at him like a bat out of hell.

Jacob turned just in time to phase back. It was werewolf against werewolf. I at least had the comfort that Jacob was larger than Michael if only by a few inches.

I searched around for Edward again.

My eyes fell on Emmett and Jasper who was helping Alice and Rose fight off Victoria and two other vampires.

Esme and Carlisle were a bit away fending off four more vampires.

The pack stood in a big clump fighting off, I couldn't even count how many vampires. They were all blurs. I only saw them for split seconds and then they were blurs again.

Jacob was still holding off Michael.

I looked for Edward and I saw him at the edge of the clearing with Sam, fighting off Marcus. My heart sank as I saw Marcus take a swipe at Edward.

I heard Alice let out a low cry. My head shot over to her direction, she was holding her arm. She was hurt. Jasper with one fast movement had the one vampire in his grasp and tore him to shreds. He looked to Alice who was now fighting another one.

All around me everyone I cared about everyone I loved was fighting, risking there lives to save mine. I saw in the corner of my eye Sam fly threw the air and hit a tree, shattering it to splinters. I heard the bones crunch as he howled in pain. I looked over to Edward he was pinned to the ground by Marcus. I tried to run to him tried to scream but everything was a blur. Marcus was thrown to the side and Carlisle was helping Edward to his feet. Sam shot back toward Marcus bearing his teeth into his side. Ripping into his fur and skin. He shook his head ferociously ripping a chunk away from Marcus. It landed on the ground a few feet beside me. Marcus growled viciously in pain snapping at Sam. I smelled smoke I looked over to see Alice and Rose throwing the bloody remains of something into a large fire.

They were fighting again in a matter of seconds. I couldn't tell what was going on anymore. If we had lost anyone, they were all to fast for me to keep up.

Michael was tormenting Jacob, taunting him to make the first move. Suddenly he was on Jacob, I heard him let out a whine of pain.

Alice was holding her arm again, Rose was with Emmett who was holding off three vampires from getting any closer to me. Then they became blurs, moving to fast for me to see.

My eyes wondered searching for Edward. Suddenly I saw Carlisle laying on the ground, Esme fighting a vampire next to him, he wasn't moving.

Edward was trying his best to hold of Marcus, but it was no use, he was to large for just one person, one vampire to hold off. Marcus took a snap at Edwards face he was on Marcus' other side in a second. He growled angrily as he swiped at Edward. Edward was a blur, and suddenly he was on his back. He groaned in pain. Marcus had him pinned to the ground again. He was staring at Edward, he knew he had won. I looked around waiting for someone to come, to come throw Marcus off. When I suddenly realized everyone else was fighting there won battles. I heard Jacob yelp in pain again.

I couldn't let this happen I had to do something.

I willed my body to move. My legs took off fast.

"Stop Victoria! I'll do it, I'll go with you just make them all stop!" I shouted

"You heard her!" Victoria yelled. "Don't move or it will be the death of you!" She looked at all her alias, wolf and vampire alike.

I looked to everyone the pack was still holding down the other vampires.

Carlisle rose from the ground toward Esme.

Alice and Rose gaped at me horror struck by my sudden movement. Jasper and Emmett were near the fire watching me intently.

Michael was in a crouch readying himself to attack Jacob again, who was standing in front of him. Then I looked t his left.

Finally looking at Edward, his face was shocked, he stared at me in disbelief as he got to his feet in front of Marcus. Marcus growled loudly obviously annoyed.

I took another step toward Victoria.

"Bella!" Edward shouted at me. Tears were falling from my face at an alarming rate, I didn't know how long I had been crying, probably the entire time. I didn't care, right now I was going to loose everyone, I couldn't allow that to happen, I ignored Edwards pleas, and took another step.

"Bella! Love don't do this!" He shouted at me.

"Bells, Don't! Think of Charlie, think of us!" Jacob yelled.

"I am Jake, I am." I whispered. I took in a raged breath as I took another step.

"Bella! Please, look at me." Edward pleaded. I closed my eyes, willing myself to stop listening. "Please." How could I disobey him how could I not give him one finally smile. I looked to Edward, I tried to smile, I didn't know if I did. But his face dropped. "Bella, you listen to me!" He called.

"I'm sorry, I wont let any of you die for me." I stated as I took another step. Victoria's eyes glistened as I got closer. She was smiling a vicious smile.

"Bella, you cant do this! Please!" I looked over at Edward, he was crying, tears falling from his face. "Bella, you finally agreed, look at your hand. Look at your finger, look at your ring! I love you Bella, please. Don't you want to see that through? Don't you want to have your wedding day? Our wedding day?" He pleaded as he sobbed. "Bella, I love you."

I stopped and looked down at my hand. I wanted that, I wanted that more than anything. I looked up to Edward and nodded.

I heard a loud intake, more of a gasp of air. I looked to Jacob, I had never seen him look so hurt, so sad before. He howled a low cry of pain. Even as a wolf he looked heartbroken, tears rolled down from his dark eyes.

I heard Victoria's shrill cry, and everything was loud, growling, snarling, fighting once again. My eyes were locked with Jakes though. Suddenly Michael hurled him into the thick brush of the woods. I heard growling and snarling come from somewhere in the dark.

I started shaking my head.

"NO!" I screamed as I tried to will myself to move, to run toward Jacob, to help him. My feet wouldn't move. I heard a loud howl of pain. I knew it was Jacob. My eyes darted into the darkness, praying for the sun, praying for light. Anything to see what was happening. It felt like forever, suddenly I saw a large dark figure walk toward the clearing, my heart stopped. I couldn't breath. Anguish rushed through my entire body.

Michael stepped into the clearing, baring his bloody teeth at me. My heart sank, tears ran down my face like rivers. I was suddenly over come with so much sadness so much pain, I couldn't stand, I fell to my knees. My eyes watched, I waited for him, he would come running out of the woods to join the fight again. He had to. Everything else was lost. I couldn't see anything else, I waited, watching the exact spot he went in at.

I heard another loud growl, which followed by a vicious snarl, and then a yelp. I didn't know who yelped. Whether it be Michael, Marcus or the pack. It didn't matter all that mattered was waiting for Jake to emerge from the trees. I was on my knees still.. Waiting.

**A?N: I know I know your totally going to hate me AGAIN for leaving it at a cliff hanger once again lol…**

**who thinks Jacobs dead?!**


	25. Chapter 25

_**A/N: **_

_**thanks for all the alerts+ and reviews.. **_

_**Thanks yet again to angel of sinne for another awesome and super long review!! She so rocks!! Lol... She also got her wish and so this chapter is for her! Lol…**_

_**Edward should totally be a real person lol… he has totally given the female population, un attainable expectations of the male race lol… shakes head**_

_**Chapter 25: Forever be Missing**_

_I waited for what felt like hours not daring to move an inch. Not caring what came after me. My vision was blurry, my face was covered with tears. I was shaking uncontrollably. He had to walk through the woods he had to. He was ok, he was strong, he wouldn't just give up. I knew it, he was ok. I would know if something happen to him. I would feel it. _

"_BELLA!" I heard my name, it sounded like the person was miles away. "Get up! Move. Bella, PLEASE!" they wanted me to move, I was annoyed, I was waiting for Jake. couldn't they see that. I looked up for a split second as a large object collided into my side. Sending me into the air. _

_I landed in a heap on the ground. I gasped as the air in my lungs was suddenly knocked out. I coughed and sputtered trying to catch my breath. Realizing we were still in a fight. I kicked and punched at my attacker. I saw Michael rise to his feet in front of me. He was hovering over top of me licking his bloody lips. _

_I kicked up at him furiously. Coming in contact with his underbelly. He let out a low whimper. I rolled to my side and scrambled out from under him. My hand came down on a large splintered piece of wood. _

_I heard Michaels loud growl echo in my ear. I grabbing the splintered wood and rolled over onto my back holding the wood in front of me just as Michael pounced for me. His sharp claws dug into my leg. I let out a loud cry of pain. _

_I heard Edward shout my name from somewhere beside me. _

_Michael landed with a loud thud, and then loud whimpers and whines erupted from him as he jumped of me pulling the wood from my hands. I looked in fear, and then in satisfaction as the large splintered wood stuck out from the side of his chest._

_I looked around anxiously toward everyone else. I realized there was only four left, Michael, Marcus Victoria and a male Vampire fighting beside her. _

_The entire pack along with Carlisle and Esme were attacking Marcus from all sides. Ripping fur and chunks from his body. I felt nauseas, I shook it away. Looking for Edward. He was fighting Victoria and the other vampire with Emmett. _

_I was hoisted to my feet by Alice. I looked back again and saw Rose tear into the other vampire, ripping his hand from his arm. _

_Emmett suddenly came barreling toward us turning into a blur as he whizzed passed us. I saw Michael fly back, wood still deep in his chest._

_He growled in pain, or angry. I wasn't sure. He grabbed the splintered piece of wood in his mouth, and pulled it out hurling it toward Emmett, who was distracted by the vampire rose was trying to deal with. It struck him in the back sending him flying forward to the ground. Michael was on him, before Emmett had time to react. I tried to pull away from Alice. She wouldn't let me go._

_I couldn't let anything happen to anyone else._

"_Michael!" I shouted, he slid to a stop almost a foot away from Emmett who was braced for the attack. Emmett lunged forward attacking him with everything he had. I heard a loud snap. As Michaels body collapsed to the ground with a thud._

"_NO!" I heard Victoria shriek from behind me. I spun around she was still fighting Edward. "You Stupid Mongrel!" She shouted. _

_I suddenly heard a loud furious malicious growl. I suddenly saw Marcus leap into the air over the pack that was fighting him. He headed straight toward Edward and Victoria. _

"_Edward." I shouted. Alice wrapped her arms around my waist keeping me in place._

_He ducked just in time. Marcus now was crouching over Victoria snarling ferociously in her face._

_The other vampire suddenly shot after Edward. My heart skipped a beat. Edward suddenly pounced on the vampire. Teeth bared and sparkling white. I heard the vampire let out a loud cry in agony, and it was cut short. Suddenly his head dropped to the ground, and rolled toward me. I looked at Edward, my heart skipped again. _

_No one was left now, it was Victoria and Marcus, and suddenly they were no longer alias. Marcus was teasing her, keeping her trapped, held tightly against the ground. _

_Then suddenly blood was everywhere splattering all around as Marcus viciously tore into Victoria, defining her cries of pain. _

_Edward was in front of me suddenly. I saw the pack all pounce at once._

"_Don't watch." he warned._

_I buried my face into Alice's chest. I heard snapping, and growls, snarling, crunching sounds, and then nothing. _

"_It's over." I heard Sam call. The pack must have changed back. _

_I pulled my face away from Alice. I looked over to Edward. _

_He looked scared. _

_Why would he be scared. It was over. I was bewildered, he looked terrified, he took a slow step forward. _

"_Bella." He whispered. "Bella, love." _

_My eyes widened. Why was he taking his good ole time to get to me. Screw it._

_I ran toward in, my leg ached with pain, but I didn't care, all I wanted was to be in his arms. _

_I jumped at him. He gasped in surprise. Suddenly he wrapped his arms around me, buried his face into my hair. He kissed my neck, my shoulder, my cheek, and finally came to my lips. _

"_Oh Bella." I sighed. "I thought, I thought you'd be afraid."_

"_I was afraid." he pulled back suddenly letting go of me._

_I looked at him confused. I went to step forward but my let shot up with pain again. I almost fell. Edward grabbed my arms and I buried my face into his chest and started to cry again._

"_I was so scared I had lost you. He was so big, so lethal. He, I, Oh Edward." I cried as I pulled away from him glancing at every part of him._

"_Are you hurt at all?" I saw some cuts on his arms, his clothes were a bit tattered but he seemed mostly unharmed. _

"_I'm fine Bella, I'm more worried about you." _

"_I'm fine, I just was scared of someone getting hurt." Then my mind flashed back to Jacob. I looked around worried. _

_I pulled away from Edward and spun in a circle looking at everyone, they were all mostly unharmed as well, some blood stains, bruising, cuts, tattered clothes. The pack was only wearing tattered shorts. I spun around once again. Still not finding him. I walked forward._

"_Bella." Edward whispered softly._

"_Hold on I have to find Jake." I stated bluntly_

_I pushed my way through the pack, looking at everyone's face. They looked sad, worried. Why was everyone so worried. It was over. I just had to find Jacob, I had to explain things._

_I walked through everyone. Coming to the last in the cluttered group. Carlisle stood beside me. He placed his hand on my shoulder, and lowered his head._

_My eyes got wide, as I spun around and looked at everyone. Jake wasn't here. No, he wasn't he couldn't be. _

_My mouthed opened slightly and then I remembered he was in the woods, I took off at a run, tripping over god knows what. I ran toward the edge of the clearing. _

_Why was no one following me, we had to go find him. _

_I ran through the woods, pushing branches out of my way. _

"_Jake!" I called. I was getting annoyed. _

"_Jacob!" I yelled. Why wasn't he answering me, he couldn't be that mad at me, could he?_

"_Bella." It wasn't him, Edward came up behind me. "Bella. Your going to get lost. Please come back to the clearing." _

"_No, I have to find Jacob. I have to explain I cant let things go the way they are. He shouldn't of found out that way." _

"_Bella." he whispered again. I turned around to look at him. He wouldn't look at my face. He just looked at the forest floor. _

"_Edward, what?" _

"_Bella, I…." His voice trailed off. _

"_No, your lying." I stated. As he picked me up._

"_Put me down." I started hitting him as he walked me back into the clearing over to everyone else._

"_Put me down, I have to go talk to him." I shouted as I smacked his arms. _

"_Bella, Love. Please. I'm sorry." He said softly. As he placed me on my feet._

_I looked up at his face. There was nothing but sorrow in his eyes. _

_I shook my head, not willing my self to believe it. He was lying, he had to be lying, but why would he lie about something like that._

"_No." I whispered mostly to myself. "NO he cant be! Your lying your all lying! He's just in the woods, just through there." I shouted._

"_Bella." Edward shook his head._

"_Bella, we cant sense him anymore, we cant here him." Quil said lightly_

_My face dropped. _

"_NO, he was just in there, he's right in through there. He never came out when.." My voice trailed off as I remembered seeing Michael come out of the woods into the clearing blood stained teeth and all, alone. No Jacob in sight. And the defining howl of pain that happen before. _

_I started shaking violently, if I didn't know I had no quilette blood in my bones I would have sworn I was about to transform for the first time. I started to sob heavily I collapsed to my knees. My hands over my face. I couldn't breath, I tried to gasp for air. Everything around me went black. _

_**EDWARDS POV **_

"_Bella! Bella." I shouted, she had collapsed to the ground. I had my arms wrapped around her trying to wake her up. It was no use._

_Carlisle came running over. He looked her over. I gently rubbed my hand on her cheek as he checked her to make sure she was ok. Her ripped a piece of his shirt sleeve and wrapped it around her leg to stop the bleeding. _

"_Is she going to be ok?" _

"_She's just had a lot to take in, give her time. She'll be ok. She just fainted from the, stress." he finished._

_We all knew it wasn't stress._

"_Alice, run to Bella's house, write a letter to Charlie telling her you stole Bella early for a shopping trip. Give him Esme's cell phone number to check. He wont believe it until he hears it from her that she's not with Edward. Do it fast, he should be awake soon. She can't go back like this." Carlisle stated and Alice was off in a flash. Jasper took off after her. _

"_What are we going to do?" _

"_Leave her be for a minute or so, she'll wake when she's ready. I have to look at everyone else." and with that he stood. He walked over to Esme she had a few cuts but other than that she was fine. _

_Embry had to have his arm popped back into place, and Sam had a few broken ribs. Carlisle set them back in place. _

"_You shouldn't phase into wolf form for at least a few days. To make sure they set properly." He informed Sam. _

"_Thank you." Sam said shaking Carlisle's hand_

"_No thank you. We couldn't have done this with out all your help. I am terrible sorry for your loss." _

"_As am I, I have to be the one to tell his father." _

_Bella began to stir. She as screaming shouting Jacobs name._

_She shot up from my lap and looked around. _

"_No" was all she said she was on her feet._

"_He, Cant be, he just cant." _

"_Bella." I grabbed her in my arms._

"_No." she whispered._

_She began to sob in my chest again. I tried to suppress mine, it did nothing. Tears began to roll down my face. _

_Bella was hurting, she was in pain, and there was nothing I could to do ease it._

"_He can't be. We have to go look for him." _

"_Bella, we did, and we don't sense him anymore. I cant feel him anywhere." Embry came up beside her and put his hand on her shoulder. She leaned over to him._

"_No, try again." She yelled. _

_Quil was suddenly a wolf. His eyes were closed. _

"_Embry look for him. We have to find him!" She was screaming, shouting at us. _

_Quil took off at a run into the woods, Embry followed. The entire pack walked toward the woods. I could hear they were just doing it to appease Bella. They couldn't sense him anymore, and that could only mean one thing. Unless Jacob was a miraculously quick learner on how to ignore the wolf instinct. He was gone. _

_Bella took off at a job toward the woods. We all followed._

_All around you heard Jacobs name being shouted. We all were searching for him, any sign of him. There was none. _

"_Edward? Bella?" I heard Alice shout. _

_I pulled Bella toward where Alice was. We walked over to her._

"_I left the note like Carlisle had said." _

_I heard Bella gasp lowly from beside me. I turned to look at her face._

_She was staring directly at Alice._

"_What?" Alice said nervously as she looked all around her. _

_She took a few steps back. As the pack and the rest of my family suddenly circled her. _

"_No." Bella whispered as she collapsed to her knees again in front of a large burnt area of the woods floor. Jacobs tattered burnt shorts lay in the center of ashes._

_I kneeled down beside Bella. Wrapping my arms around her gently. _

_I knew I couldn't heal her pain. I could do nothing but let her cry, and comfort her as she did. She had lost her best friend. I then realized how much she truly cared about him. I suddenly was kicking myself for not listening to her when she told us to get along. I knew how much it had tore her up to have the to most important men in her life fighting and being at each others throats all the time. She sobbed heavily into my shirt. My sudden realization made me grieve for the loss too. Knowing if Bella had cared that much about him, he couldn't have been that bad of a person. Even if he was trying to steal the reason for my existence, he didn't deserve this. _

"_Bella, I'm so sorry." I said as I rubbed her back. It only made her sob more. _

"_He can't be gone." She cried. _

_Quil and Embry quietly Knelt beside me, head bowed in silence. She looked up for a second, and slowly stopped sobbing. I only saw sadness and pain in her eyes. She reached for Quil's hand. I let her go softly. Quil pulled her into a hug and she began to cry again. Embry leaned his head onto her shoulder. _

_I wanted to pull her away, pull her into a hug, and suck the pain out of her. But I knew that was impossible there was nothing that was going to heal the pain she felt. The pain we all felt. _

_Jasper kept sending waves of calm to everyone but soon gave up. He had to walk away the emotions were just to much for him. _

_Alice soon followed after him, after Carlisle had examined her arm. She had been bitten. The vampire venom and stung her arm badly but that was the extent of her injuries. It would heal over night. _

_I wished Bella would heal that quickly. _

_I looked down at her as she hiccupped into Quil's chest. Embry was shaking, but not from anger, he was sad for the loss of his friend as well._

_The three of them sat there on the ground for a long while. Consoling each other. I wanted to pull Bella away, but I knew she needed this. I knew they all needed this. _

_I walked over to Sam who was sitting on a fallen tree. His face in his hands. _

"_I'm sorry for your loss Sam." I said, he looked up at me and nodded._

"_I think this will effect us all." _

_I nodded and agreed._

"_Werewolf and Vampire alike." I added. _

_I thought your kind couldn't cry? He thought_

_His sudden thought startled me. I raised my hand to my face and felt he wetness that was now leaking from my eyes. _

_He narrowed his for a moment "I Forgot you could read my thoughts." he stated_

"_Yea, I, sorry." I said as I wiped my face. "Usually we can't, no ones heard of it before. it's a recent development to me to. It started when I cried over Bella a few weeks ago." I stated, probably telling more than I should, but at this point I didn't care, I owed Sam for my life. As he did me. We had fought side by side against Marcus. Saving one another a few times. _

"_That's strange, I've never heard of it before."_

"_Carlisle looked in all his books, there was nothing about it. He thinks with deep sadness, deep emotion some how I can now." I shrugged unsure._

"_Thank you Edward." is sudden thanks baffled me._

"_For what" I stated as I wiped my eyes again. Trying to blink the tears away._

"_This has showed me that maybe your, family at least is different. You cry for Jacob as the rest of my pack and Bella do." _

_I went to open my mouth but he raised his hand. _

"_You may be crying because of the loss that Bella feels for Jacob, but at the same time it is your own loss. I see that now, alias or not, we have no reason to fight a battle against each other. I see that now. Jacob tried to tell me that a while ago with Bella. I wouldn't listen. You were gone why did I have to." He grinned. "You came back and with that I the treaty came back. I see no reason for a treaty anymore." _

_My eyes widened in fear for a short second. Sam laughed half heartedly._

"_Not because we can now fight each other. Just I see no reason to keep up the fight to keep you off our land. You fought well, you saved my life, you grieve for my loss. Enemy of my enemy is my friend." _

"_Yea, you saved my life to." I said _

_Carlisle walked toward us. _

"_Thank you Sam." _

_Sam stood to shake Carlisle's hand._

"_Please let us know when if you need anything, anything at all." _

"_His father will make the arrangements." _

"_If he needs help with anything, doesn't matter the cost. You tell him I am more than willing to help. Jacob fought well tonight, he should have a proper and fitting burial. He should be remembered for the great person he was." Carlisle stated, Sam nodded._

_I heard Bella sob loudly again. I walked over to her. Quil lifted her slightly I picked her up. _

"_Edward, take, me, home." she whimpered shakily. _

"_Ok love." _

_I walked away from everyone else. Leaving behind Jacobs ashes. _

_I wanted to walk forever, walk Bella as far away from this place as possible. Let her forget it quickly. I knew it wouldn't help though. It didn't matter how far I took her. Jacob would always be a part of her, a part of her that would forever be missing. _

_**A/N: lemme kno watcha think please!!**_

_**PLEASE R&R!! **_


	26. Chapter 26

**Chapter 26: Epilogue**

**BELLAS POV**

It had been three weeks since Jacobs, I gulped at the last word, death. The funeral was hard to go to. I didn't even want to get out of bed. I cried for a few days straight, I wouldn't sleep and barely ate. I probably only did that because Edward would have force fed me. Same with my dad. The funeral was down at La Push on the beach.

Everyone was there. The Cullen's were all there. Edward was consoling me, Charlie was consoling Billy, and Carlisle was talking to Sam, telling him again that if they needed anything.

Carlisle had also made sure that Jacob wouldn't just be a distant memory. He paid for a service, and a miraculous grave stone. 'Beloved son, cherished friend. A great hero.' Charlie was the only one who didn't get the hero part but he didn't say anything.

Hero he was. He gave up his life to save mine.

I looked up at Edward, he was on the brink of tears, but was fighting them back.

Billy was crying, sobbing into his hands. He knew the truth about what had happen to his son, he was relieved at the fact he went out fighting.

That day there were no stupid boundary lines, there was no need for a treaty. There was no such thing as werewolves and vampires. We were all just friends, coming together to mourn a lost loved one. Some how Jacobs death had some good come out of it. The pack was grateful for all the help the Cullen's had given and vise versa. Billy wasn't thrilled with the idea at first and neither were the rest of the people down at La Push. I don't think any of them would really understand. They weren't there, they didn't see how the pack had risked there lives to save not only my life but the Cullen's as well, and they also didn't see how the Cullen's had protected the pack as if they were one of there own.

I don't think anyone ever will clearly understand how thankful they were for one another.

The rest down at La Push didn't fully understand still, but they realized they had no need to worry, or feel threatened by the Cullen's when Carlisle had set all this up for Jacob. So he would be remembered properly.

I knew that Billy would soon be telling stories to the kids of La Push about Jacob. He would soon become a legend amongst his kind. A great protector Billy had said in his speech about Jacob.

Three weeks. It was a long time to hope, but I still had hope. It was crazy I know. I almost expected to see Jake come running down to the beach as I sat there watching the waves crash. Every day I would come sit here in silence, sit in the same spot I had the first time I had talked to Jacob. The first real day my life had changed, the day he told me what Edward really was, and what he was for that matter, even if he didn't know it at the time. I would just sit not saying a word for I don't know how long, hours sometimes. Remembering all the good times that we shared. Remembering how he had been there to save me from myself when Edward had left.

It was ironic, now Jacob left me alone, and Edward was comforting me. It was as if some how the rolls had been reversed, but I knew Jacob would never be coming back. I would never see him smile at me, I would never feel his warm arms around me as he squeezed the breath out of my lungs in a tight hug. We would never again laugh in his shed as he worked on his car. I thought about everything I would miss. There was a lot. I looked next to me as Edward was doing something the drift wood I was sitting on. I tried to peek.

"Stop, it's a surprise." Edward hissed with a smile.

"Fine." I stood up and walked over to the waters edge.

"Ok I'm done." he called. I walked back to where I was sitting and Edward stepped away letting me see what he was doing.

My mouth dropped.

Carved deeply in the wood was a big wolf print, and the words Jacob Black will never be forgotten sketched perfectly in the wood.

"Edward. It's amazing." I hugged him. "Thank you."

"It's not just for you, but now when people come to the beach they'll see this and remember."

I smiled up at him.

"Thank you, it means a lot to me. I know you didn't.." he didn't let me finish.

"Bella, he not only saved your life, but mine as well. We fought together, we all did. The pack, my family. There is a new understanding. Even for him. I still don't like the fact he tried to take you from me, but everything else is forgotten." he smiled at me and kissed my forehead.

I started to sob again. I promised my self I was done. I was over this, I was through with crying. I tried to stop, I closed my eyes tightly willing the tears to stop falling.

"Bella, stop love. Its ok. Let it out cry."

"But I promised myself I was done crying." I sniffled.

"Bella, there will be days, probably for the rest of your life that you cry for Jacob. He was your best friend. You don't just forget things like that. Jacob wouldn't want you to forget."

"I'm not forgetting, its just, I don't want to cry anymore. Its not fair to you."

"Bella, look at me." I looked up at him he too had tears in his eyes, not as much as mine did but still.

Edward had come to a great understanding I still didn't fully understand, but he understood why Jacob loved me because he loved me too. He understood why Jacob did all the things he had done and said. He told me that if it was reversed and I was with Jacob, he would have done the same things, probably even more.

He told me that he regretted not listening to me, that he should have gotten off his high horse and forgot about his hurt pride and gotten along for Jacob, not only would it have been easier, but just for the simple fact its what I wanted.

This entire thing had everyone acting oddly strange. The Cullen's had the pack over for a dinner party even though they don't eat they had a huge caterer with all kinds of food. Just because they knew how much the pack could eat.

The Cullen's were now allowed where ever they wanted. There was no stupid boundary line.

Jacob had united us all. They weren't close friends having sleepovers but they were all friends the same. Rosalie and Leah had actually went shopping together, they got along great. No real surprise there, at least not to me.

There were no enemies between them anymore. Edward and Sam got along rather well. I think it was the whole fighting against Marcus and saving each others butts as Emmett so thoughtfully put it.

Emmett also liked the fact he had more guys to try to beat at video games. He had more opponents. I didn't understand how they all got along I came over to Edwards a few days ago and found Embry, Quil, Seth, Sam, Jared, Paul, Emmett, and Jasper all playing Halo 3 on three different TV's. Edward tried to explain how that was possible but it went over my head. I think the only one who had a problem with the new sudden understanding between everyone was Paul, he was slowly coming around though. This was the first I had seen him actually laughing and smiling when in the presence of the Cullen's.

I walked up my stairs after the long day at the beach with Edward. I plopped onto my bed with a loud whoosh as I breathed out.

"Bella I'll be back later tonight I promise, as we planned after graduation we tell your father the news." he grabbed my hand in his and kissed the ring. I groaned. Graduation to engagement. I rolled my eyes.

"Where you going?"

"Hunting with the family. I wont be far. I'll have my cell if you need me at all. Alice said she can come stay with you if you'd like."

"No that's ok tell her I'll be fine, to go hunt with the rest of the family. You haven't hunted since I cant remember when."

"I've had snacks." He grinned

"Go hunt, have a deer for me?" I smiled.

"Are you going to be ok?"

"Yes I'll be fine I promise. If I need anything ill call you."

"Ok, I'll be back in a few hours." He kissed me patiently on my lips and gently traced circles on my cheek I moaned lightly.

"I love you Bella."

"I love you." I said as he walked back downstairs.

Charlie had been spending a lot of time over with Billy. He wasn't home so there was no worry for getting caught.

When I heard the car pull away, I flopped back on the bed and sighed. I tried not to think about it but it was hard. I missed my friend, I missed Jacob.

The fact that I knew he was never coming back made it that much worse. I tried to think of something else. Anything else, but the agony was to strong for that, there was no escaping it. Jacob, was gone.

I sighed deeply and pushed myself up off the bed. I walked over to my window I didn't remember leaving it open, Edward must have opened it. I shrugged and leaned my arms against the frame sticking my head out.

I looked out at into the distance at the full moon. I sighed, I heard a wolf howl in the distance. Ugh I pulled myself back into the window. I heard something fall off the window sill and clink to my floor. I looked and saw something on the floor.

I kneeled down and picked it up. A sudden shock washed over me as I rolled it around in the palm of my hand. I glanced back at the window and pushed myself through, glancing into the distance, searching, looking all over. I saw nothing, everything was silent, still.

I looked down at what I had in my hand.

It was a leather string with a tiny familiar wooden wolf pendant attached to it. I clenched the wolf in my hand tightly.

I have learned two lessons in my life: first, there are no sufficient literary, psychological, or historical answers to tragedy, only moral ones. Second, just as despair can come to one another only from other human beings, or creatures, hope, too, can be given to one only by others.

**A/N: that's it, there isn't anymore! All over… full moon is now finished..**

**Should I make a sequel or should I just leave it the way it is? Let everyone wonder what happen. Or should I make a sequel with more?! Lol…**

**Let me know!! **

**My friend said I should make a sequel explain more bout jake… and have someone new come to forks. Whatcha think… anyways…**

**If you want a sequel then PLEASE tell me what you would like to see in the sequel or what you would like to happen!! : - ) please and thank you..**


	27. the end

**A/N: FIRST OFF. READ FULL MOON BEFORE GOING ANY FURTHER, OR YOU WONT UNDERSTAND!**

**Second… **

**I'm not sure if I like the title… :-/ **

**So if ya have any ideas LEMME KNO!! **

**Also any ideas or thoughts of what you wanna see or thinks gonna happen in this story… let me know!!**

**Thanks for all your reviews and alerts on full moon…..**

**I'm glad you all liked that story so much!!**

**Hope you like this one just as much if not more!! **

**Please R&R **

**Chapter one: Prologue**

We must accept finite disappointment, but never lose infinite hope. 

I forget where I heard that from but I think it fits how I'm feeling. Everyone else is loosing hope, or I should say I'm the only one left with it. 

Its been a little over three months since we had all thought Jacob had died. Three long months. A lot has happen since then, graduation, my engagement, Me and Edward had agreed we were going to tell Charlie this week that we were getting married. I dreaded that. I knew he wouldn't be happy. 

Three long months, and a lot has changed, and then so little has at the same time. Three months since Jacob disappeared, three months I sat here worrying whether I was loosing my mind for having hope, three months it felt like forever, and yet I could still see the pain, the sadness and hurt in Jakes eyes like it was yesterday, he had heard I was engaged to Edward I blamed my self for his so called death, I didn't believe he was dead. I still had hope. 

I knew he had left his necklace at my window for me to know he was ok. Edward came home the day I found it. He said I was crazy that it could have been there for who knows how long. I remembered he had it on the day he supposedly died. The day we had got in the fight, the day my life changed forever.

No one would listen to me. 

'He could have come after the fight and left it.'

I was in my room the entire time waiting, with Edward he would have known he was there. Again no one listened to me. They said it was wishful thinking. 

There was so many things that proved that he was gone. His ashes, his tattered burnt shorts, that fact there was no sign of him since. Why would he stay away this long make everyone worry about him. The biggest one of all, why cant the pack sense him, hear him at all. 

I had no answers to any of them. All I had was a leather necklace with a wolf pendant that now hung around my neck. It gave me strength it gave me hope. I knew it was his, I could feel it. I saw him wearing the necklace the same day he disappeared. Jasper had told me that it could be anyone's necklace, I almost killed him with the anger that was coming from me. 

Edward just went along with everything I said and told me he'd be here if I needed anything. He just didn't want to upset me anymore than I already was, I knew he didn't have any hope at all. Whether it was he didn't want hope, or just couldn't see the point, I didn't know. The pack wanted hope, but they didn't believe it was possible. Quil and Embry were the only ones who would ask if I had found anything new out. My answer was the same, I never found anything new, except the day I found his necklace, that was the only clue I had, the only reason for hope. 

Billy was the only one who had hope with me now. He would help me put up fliers, call around to different hospitals, and police stations. Charlie helped with that, he wanted to see Jacob back home safe and sound. I asked Edward if he really had any hope at all, he would always change the subject, so I always took it as a 'no Bella you're the only one crazy enough to still have hope' but he did it just for me, and Billy. I was beginning to think Billy's hope was diminishing. It has been so long and no word yet.

No one really thought I was right but they knew I had to have hope. They all listened to my theories, they all agreed that it was a possibility, but I knew they didn't believe, they didn't think it was possible after all this time, Jacob was just going to come walking into the house one day. 

I had to believe, I had to hope. Without hope, we have nothing. 

**A/N: this one will have no limits.. But please R&R Still… the next chapter however will have certain of reviews I have to get before I update. So review review review : -) **


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